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From the days I've always held your hands
To every drop from the sorrowful
waterfall
From beautiful paleness to crimson illness
Night to day
Sunlight ray
Love like rich soil
Hollowness finally at bay

Beautiful like a porcelain doll
Like a sunset from a mountain fall
Memories of a blissful past
Emotions sustained like an icefall
At long last
My truly dearest...

From the summer breeze
To the autumn fall
The winter night
An endless darkness
I wish to see the light

Pain from a raven's claw
forceful despair
As if it was divine law
Distastefulness
From a tainted pear
It's too much to bare...

As the last leaf falls from the oak tree
Only a skeletal structure remains
From its former beauty
A monolith of youthful & elderly
Like funeral roses
Dying in many poses
Red scarlet child
As the last petal falls
One last breath
At long last death

Mourning rainfall
Soft spoken lullabies from the wind
Lamenting days that ceases to
exist anymore...
Upon the ocean shore
Whispers of the waking dead
Midnight blue moonlight
Symphonies from the ocean floor
Alone at last
With my truly dearest
Ruby diamond eyes
No more frightened cries
Promise me you'll never leave again
Promise me you'll always stay
forever...
haven't posted a new poem since last year
Here we lie, tangled in
Each other, yet apart

My eyes focus, I track across
Your face, this room, these clothes
So known and yet as blurred
As the graphics on your shirt

I count your eyelashes
As though they are rosary beads,
And try to find you hidden
In their shells

I see you, but don't know you.
Bittersweet memories
Crash and break around me;
I lose you in their depths

Two pairs of lips in a blind dance
I barely follow.
Disgust and want fight over me,
Love lost in waves of apathy

Hormonal needs are met by hands
Ill-conceived kisses greet them-
Breath is caught too quickly
And my desperate searching fails.

Your mask grimaces. You smile,
I’m blank, and pale and still.
My mind and soul are smothered
By dark polluted thoughts

And when it's over, it's not finished;
You study my face for clues
While I trace the etchings of my skin
And yearn for clean release

It's not you, it's me.

It's not you, and it's not me either,
This room is not your room.
I drift, unanchored, unresponsive
Too tired to understand

So I silently indulge
You in complicity
And although our bodies join
We both miss our connection

My mind has turned the one I love
Into a stranger.
You are that sweet old trouble brewing,
as I sit and watch the fire tonight,
and I wonder...
hey boy what you doin'?

As that failing memory plays..
this is what I hear it say,
as I'm staring out at you & viewing,
and though a relationship with you,
could not be worth pursuing,

Until you call me again,
& come to me
& I'm the one you're wooing,
except I think it's just the ***,
to you I think it's just the *******,

But I don't know how to disagree,
as again my blouse you are undoing,
reality is sure looking pretty fuzzy,
& my everything you're quickly skewing,

I say OK let's do this thing,
as inhibitions are now subduing,
and as we again indulge,
to you again I'm always cuing,

As your sweet sweet lips press,
on my weak weak neck,
you run your hands down,
my waiting body,
hey sweet baby,
I say,
what the heck,

As you
run them down,
across my eager chest,
& over an ever arousing breast,

I know I shoulda stopped at just a peck,
& your past I hear is something,
I should check,

But wait you say,
hold there girl just a cotton pickin' sec,

I play it over and over,
I should have stayed away,
and now...

I'm just a complete & total wreck.

Cherie Nolan © 2016
No idea anymore ...any of it ugh...
Do I love you
Or do I just love the thought of you?
The thought of you with me
Is this just an illusion my rotting heart has drawn
For it to have a reason to keep beating?

Is love a lie
Or just my idea of love?

Do I hold your hand
Just for the feeling of your warmth
Or because I care?
Does the thought of you keep me up at night,
Because I need you
Or because I need comfort?

Is passion my drug
And you're just a relapse?

Do I love you?
Do I really love you?
Did I really love you?
Leaves  changing color
Visions of nature
My eyes roll back in my head.
Get the bad thing out. Just **** it.
Summoning or suppressing demons: Take a pill and swallow hard.
Have you ever lost control of your body before?

— The End —