I am aware
of all things present,
the pinch behind my eyes
the pressure in my nose
my deep, soft,
too loud–heavy–quiet breathing
(How?)
Give me back my bones
Give me back my sleep,
my dreams.
Too close, too much, not enough:
I am endlessly ending

Cry

Please let me sleep–end–cry–
somethinganythingplease

Silly boy
Broke my heart

Hes a toy
Been from the start

But we got this way
And its all jumbled

Seems my hearts to pay
For this fumble

What is the meaning to walk, to wail the way
I hold dear to me what’s not and shame what’s what
No meaning, for meaning is meaningless, just as meaningless is meaningless
But what if purpose?
Is meaning purpose?
Most do not think this; though I do
Those words are similar, but not same
I walk, cry, think, live suffer for you

For you are purpose.

The marks and bruises on my body
daddy says don't show
His voice in my head
screaming  "don't tell"
Daddy says it's okay to be a *****
He says it's okay to earn what you eat
But then why do I feel filthy everynight after he is done?
Why can't I wash the filth away?
Is daddy doing something wrong
or is it just me?
Forget me
iam just being paranoid
Daddy is never wrong.