I can drown myself in new music and relive my memories
sometimes I write a lot and sometimes I need to get away

you thought you got away with ****** but everything was on tape
it was like painting numbers on a white pale wall, something clean

humans don't go look for danger, danger will find them where needed
you never waited for me to get my **** together, you said you hated me

it were the bad things I only could remember about you, all the bad

and all the lonely boys fell for the girl who was now a thing called pretty
and all the popular boys didn't fell for the same girl back in those days

Mondays always came with rain and Friday always left with a smile
the moments you lived for were minimal, it were only the weekends

I remember how lonely you felt, missing the people around you
the voices in your head became your new home, they were your friends
sometimes they come back, just to say a simple hello...

it was all about living for someone that never take a breath for you.

im laying on your bed, still wearing your used sweater
singing songs again and loving my life like I did before I met you

the storm was over and I could go back to that one place I loved most
the ocean was waiting for me, I could feel the wind in my face

my hair never grow long again and my legs never got skinny
and I was okay with that, I was okay with myself, everything was okay

the drugs did its job last night, you kissed me on the dance floor
and you always thought my jokes were serious and you always loved me

the alcohol did its job last night, you walked me home after all
and you always smiled at me and you always loved me for who I was

but still one day you stopped sending me flowers, you needed space
either you want me or you don't, I need to know about our future

I can't read you like I can read the stars in the sky, the rain, the sun
my heart knows when I should walk away, that moment is now.

Im done feeling like a stranger to myself.

I was a mess and you just walked away, leaving me for nothing
I still could write a thousand stories about that one night, you left

without your tears I don't have inspiration to write like this
because I know you cried too when I said my last goodbye..

and when she was alone in her room with all the lights out
she started to believe that all the good was happening somewhere else

the angels were done saving you when you stopped singing your prayers
god still loved you, he loves everyone but you were something special
she could not be saved anymore, it was done, she was gone, dark, out

her nails were painted black, her eyes were painted black
the color in her life was fading away, the color left when you did

now she's wearing a smile that nobody believes in

you need to learn when the party is over little girl, put the bottle away.
save your tragic stories for somebody who cares because he doesn't

we never were friends because we never tried to be friends.
it is really not that bad, I hope this makes you sad.

dear diary,

I know I havent wrote to you for a long time
but you have to understand a lot happened in my life

sometimes I feel bad because I know some people have it worse
but does that mean I can't feel like a worthless *******?

to be honest I don't know what to think or feel anymore
maybe I stopped writing because I felt like I was annoying
if I am annoying I'm sorry

last week I made a new friend, his name is Delorian
the truth is he doen't exist I made him up, but I act like he does, breath
just to feel less lonely, I need someone to be an outcast just like me
I can see and feel him though

does that make me weird?

last night I had a dream about him, he was very nice to me

thanks for listening, as always

you stopped loving yourself when they started loving you

it was the moment all the people around you opened their eyes
that you decided to keep them close, you kept pretending, you kept hope

Jersey just got colder when you packed your bags and left me for dead
I was crying in the hallway begging you to spend another day with me
but you said you never wanted to see my blue eyes again, and you went

it was like the world stopped turning that second you looked at me
the people on earth stopped breathing at that moment you said goodbye

my heart couldn't stop screaming, my lungs were getting out of air
talking is cheap and your talks were expensive, I had to pay it all..

you always wore a necklace with my name on it, you always were happy
I took away that smile when I came into your life, like the dark night sky

a day after the day you left, my life felt miserable yet wonderful

I could hear the broken kids whispering my name while riding my bike
they would call me things like hopeless and sad, cruel and ugly

but he never seemed to care about the whispers,
because I didn't loved him anyway.

I always could care less about my own feelings as long as you are okay

you are my favorite human being because you make me feel complete
because she was the only one who didn't see me as a crazy psychopath

and I thought she was so beautiful with her green eyes and white scars
it was the kind of beauty not a single soul could ever describe.

this girl was the light in my world and yeah she kinda saved my life
all the demons were gone whenever she was near me, she was my angel

the way you talk about your passion for guitars and your favorite bands
I love you for the way you speak about life and our future together..

and would never ever dare to let you go my darling, you are mine

you are so insanely sweet and so insanely beautiful, you cant even see it
I love you for everything that you are and everything you want to be

this cant be healthy now how much I want to be with you, always