In the beginning it was all so simple ... Then you started messing with my mental... What is with you ?
When you are gone , you do everything to make me miss you ...
Oh, how I wanna kiss you ..even when I'm mad.
Your kisses were always so sweet. Your touch was always so gentle ... Lately, your touch feels different. Why ? I don't know .. Your here but your mind is elsewhere .. I lay on your chest, and your heart is not beating the same ...things is changing. Is it you within? Or is it me ? Did i do something ? Is this still something ? You are still the one for me.
Am I even an option to keep , for you? I know all you been through .. You get scared. Cant take that out on me ..I told you , You can count on me.
In the beginning it was so simple ... If you still with me , Im with you !

Most nights, I cant wait to fall asleep.... Every morning its so hard to get up.  The sun shines through the window , as I smell the coffee being made..
The smell of that cigarette being lit, ..
I know I'm alive ..
But I still feel so dead.
When the sun shines through the window, I smile all the time ..
Its beautiful to me .. And when it hits my eyes, they look so much brighter and prettier ....
I roll over and yarn .. I streach and try to make my way out the bed. .
Instead, I rest.
The coffee is very soothing.. & even though I know deep down inside I'm lost and broken ...
That sun shining through the window , leaves me open.

Yes I'm moody , so what !
I really dont care ..
Cause nobody was ever there.
Those early mornings and long nights. Im the one who wipe my tears through every fight.
With all my might , I had to pretend I was alright ... Im never in the mood. The fake love, the playing the fool.. The trying to smile, being anti social .. People i couldn't get use to.
I'm in my own world, being moody.. "Get out my face"! Im not a cutie.. My family yells upstairs to get my attention, come join the party ...
I was always missing.
In my room, all alone.
I couldn't be around anyone... I didnt want to..The depression took over, so that's why I'm moody.. You would know, If you really knew me!

You say its not goodbye.
But I can see the fronting in your eyes, I can feel the distance. I can feel the love dying... I can feel something missing ...
I'm not gonna do a lot of crying. Matter fact. Just tell me where your mind is at ? Where your heart is at ? Is me loving you to much, making you not love me back ? Tell me ..

Early morning drink with ice, of course. I always felt so lost.
In my mind was dark, my soul was crushed and my life was built on pretending.
I smiled, I laughed a lot.
No one knew my heart was in a knot. My body was numb, My thoughts were evil. I tried to break through all that I was going through. Could this all be so true? Was I losing myself, ...it was all something I was new to.  
Nothing I was use to.
The pain , frustration and anger.
I didn't wanna talk, some days I didn't wanna get up ... Everything was a fuss.
I had to figure out what was wrong, the depression I couldn't take ..I knew it would take over one day ...Will I ever be okay !?

IF YOU KNOW YOUR POEM OR WRITING IS GOOD. SOME PEOPLE MIGHT NOT LIKE IT. WILL VIEW IT BUT WONT LIKE IT. DONT GET DISCOURAGED. XOXO - LEEANNROSE #POSITIVE #VIBES love is love

I was to depressed to love you correctly.
I swear I tried ...
I thought letting u do whatever ,would make u happy and maybe would make me happy. Most nights I cried.
Pretending I didn't care that u went out those nights .
When I never wanted to be alone ..  
all it did was push me away from you.. Everything went falling and crashing into pieces, all that we worked so hard for , there was no more.
Had one foot in , and one foot out the door. Maybe, our love wasn't ready for loving anymore.