Time..
ticking by..
suns and moon..
Passing by..

Long ago we did not mind,
Of the weight of choices,
of what we'd find.

Long ago we did not care,
for tomorrows and soons,
for they were always there.

Long ago we felt no pressure,
no joy to end,
no sadness to measure.

But now..
It's time,
to make a choice,
to decide.

Whether or not
we take a stride,
into the future
with dreams in our hands.

Or take a step back,
and blow everything,
to sand.

Whatever we do,
whatever we say,
It's our decision,
To go on or stray.

It hurts like hell,
It's embarrassing
Am I the only one who can do no right?

I feel unwell,
like only ripping apart my chest,
slitting my throat open,
and gouging my heart
can make me feel better.

I feel useless,
I feel unwanted,
I don't feel good.

I feel a pain in my chest,
I've felt it before,
I've hoped it would never return.

I don't know anymore,
I'm at a point in my life,
where I need help,
where I need guidance.

But I'm so **** stupid to see!
All this revolves around me.
My decisions,
my choices.

If I weren't in this ****** world,
would something be amiss?
Would there be any change at all?

I hate it!
I hate myself,
Everything seems to be crumbling around me.

Every night I can't sleep,
Every night I cry just to feel relief.
Every night I need someone to tell me it's okay.
But no one does.........

I can't take it anymore,
If my best friend is reading this..
I'm sorry...
I can't tell you face to face.
It just hurts so badly.
I can't help it,
**I'm sorry

I've never been the type of girl
To fall so easily for a guy
But here I am falling for you
And I can't even fathom why

You were just a cafeteria crush
My feelings weren't supposed to grow
But with these food and snack encounters
I found that we've reaped and now we sow

Your cool fingers on my neck
Halt me enough to arch my spine
I know our love wouldn't be tragic
But I can't let history rewind

So I'll let you in eventually
When these walls all finally come down
But if you decide to climb them
Please don't be crushed if you hit the ground

Color in my dull palette,
light in my dark abyss,
eyes to my unseeing soul.

You who has conquered this heart,
knows nothing of a battle.
Sitting as still as a metal pole.

Hold my fate
gingerly I plead.
As the storm's waters
in my heart secede.

I've given everything,
anything and all.
Please, I beg you,
**quit trying to stall.

You know I like you,
You brush it off like nothing.
I am here hoping.

How happy was I
when we first spoke,
when you would call
and bring joy to me.

It went on for a while
but maybe.
Somehow you grew tired of me.

It hurts because I believed,
It hurts because I fell.
It hurts so much more,
because I thought it went well.

Today I was excited,
to see you at last.
I would see you amidst them all.

But what I saw,
and what I felt,
made my vision go small.

There you were,
standing with a smile.
The kind that made this life worthwhile.

But everything changed
when I realized.
I wasn't the one who made you smile.

She stood beside you,
hair hiding her face.
You spoke sweetly,
like honey's embrace.

It pained me to think,
that you didn't want me.
That all we had was just play.

Why didn't you like me?
Why didn't you say?
But I guess that's how my story will go.
Each and every day.

We've all got problems,
You and I.
We've all got secrets,
some truths, some lies. *

Yes its true,
you've got things on your mind.
But don't think for a second,
I didn't give you my time.

While you rambled on,
I was always there.
Comforting, protecting,
Did you even care?

I put you first,
I did what was asked.
And now you tell me,
our friendship won't last??

You said I never shared
a piece of my mind.
Oh, I'm sorry I'm too busy!
I was just being kind.

You always spoke,
I merely supported.
You had to many problems,
I did not want to add.

Yet now you say,
I was never trusting.
That I kept to myself,
Finding them amusing.

I hate being rejected,
I am never appreciated.
You think I'm mad?
You're just overrated.