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MicMag Aug 2018
What's it take
These days

To write a poem

That makes the world go mad
That brings the crowds to their feet
That spreads like wildfire
Through a dry winter forest

Is it those excessively long words?
The ostentatiously loquacious
Platitudinous ramblings
Of an insecure mind aspiring
To authentic intellect?

Is it perhaps...
     the "creativity"
               of      varied      spacing
  or...    could it be..... the lack
                              of capitalization
               the loathsome little letters
               screaming out
                         hey, look at us!
         ... or maybe it's
               the punctuation marks,
     littered, haphazardly
          through the text
                    (whether used correctly)
               or, theyre not?!
     despite worrds mispeled
          and a grammar might is broken
   can these gimmicks increase interest
        though miswritten or misspoken?

Is the trick alliteration
Whose bite brightly bids us
To center on the snappy sounds?
Although all along
     unvoiced underneath
Ideas idle in the isles
   (or perhaps the aisles)
Of the mind
To meld and craft and bind
Our thorough thoughts
And worthy words
Into lines
Which
Heard by herds
Raise the
                  Praise for which we
                  Privately, desperately
                  Pray

Maybe it's a magical mix
Of splendid in-your-head rhythm
Marvelous meter that perfectly clicks
Flowing smoothly without schism

Well-spaced stanzas
Well-used time
Well-crafted phrases
Well-thought-out rhymes

Well, maybe not...
     those gems are often ignored
     cast-aside, unread, even abhorred

Why?

Because the modern world
doesn't need your rules
your restrictions
your regulations
your misguided boundaries
your oppression
your antiquated ideas
   of "the right way"
   to write
   to speak
   to act
   to live
   to (fill in the blank)

No, what the modern world needs
is
Negation!
Contradiction!
Resistance!
Revolt!

And poetry whose words
Say the same thing
Repeat the same meaning
Echo the same lyrics
Rephrase the same thoughts
But in an ever-so-slightly
Different
Varied
Altered
Adjusted
Changed up way

Line
After line
Of synonyms
          over
               and
                    over
                         and
                              over
                                   again

-----

What's it take
These days

To not give in
To narcissism's spiral?

But more importantly:
What's it take

To make my poem go viral?
Only halfway cynically written, I swear!
Poetoftheway Oct 2018
how do you know (when a broken human can be fixed)


https://hellopoetry.com/poem/2644586/how-do-you-know-when-a-human-is-too-broken/

supermarket checkout line, so lazy broken down dressed,
I’m probably arrestible for disturbing the peace,
my haired piled, and held together by a broken clip,
makeup at home in
a drawer labeled ‘why bother’
my t shirt, don’t please look too closely,
yesterday’s coffee spillage outline
only mostly gone,
and the skinny jeans that felt inappropriate
ten pounds ago,
now looking semi-completely ridiculous

is this a tv show?
wallet, a twenty and a single,
who knew a pound of ground blue mountain
cost the better part of the the twenty
in that case no need for a gallon of milk
and *** a box of chocolate frosted donuts
silently slid far far away,
evidence of a guilty plea of irresponsibility resignation

short $2.42 (cut up the credit cards)
and no convenient pit to fall into
when the teenager cashier snickers,
when a sam elliot voice says here ya are,
stammering a no, a thank you, and thinking getaway direction

truck safely, made it,
knock on the window
sam elliot soundalike is a lookalike as well
standing outside with my wallet in hand,
two heads taller than my ex-petite figurine

more stammering ******* could I look any stupider

but inside a piece of brown shopping bag torn
with ten whole digits
I’ve never seen prior to this disaster
saying call when you want to return my $2.42

turns out he got, no, he is glue and paste,
an eraser man for fine lines and sad times,
and a lasso to keep me held together,
a pocket red handkerchief hanging half out
of his back pocket, never without, calls it his tear catcher

pulled out that too tight blues-blouse
from back of my closet
that still complements my complexion,
wear it ever time that day rolls around

just dumb luck ain’t much of an answer
so I’ll rephrase, dumb luck is in the everything
cause his number was 917-242-2424
and he is a gambler in matters of the heart

bust his ***** when he says he’s a lucky man,
reply he ain’t got no luck at all
compared to me on that daft day

and every daft day thereafter
I glue his lips shut to mine, no escaping,
and paste a new $2.42
into his wallet
when he is sleeping mine,
no erasing our lines,
just redrawing them deeper and finer,
just making sure my
dumb luck is working overtime
Dea Sep 2018
How to start writing
How to keep writing
Write, write, write
Writing

Pick a subject for writing
Make sure you reference your writing
Write, write, write
Keep writing

This amount of words for writing
Plus or minus 100 word max leeway for writing
Write, write, write
Still writing

Quotes in your writing
Punctuation for writing
Write, write, write
Writing

Title for writing
Page numbers for writing
Underline, paragraph, CAPITALISE
Your writing

Margin your writing
Spell check your writing
Re write, research, rephrase
Your writing

Is this your writing?  
Question your writing

Read
Hate
***** up
Start again
Your writing

Check your writing
Get a friend to check your writing
Panic, stress, just write
Your writing

****** writing

This will do, writing

Print, bind, hand in
Your writing

Write some more as you sign off your writing

Sigh
Feel sick
Crash
Sleep
Writing

Wait, wait, wait
Wait for someone to read your writing

Judge your writing
Mark your writing
Wait, wait, wait

Receive your writing

Read another's writing about your writing

Their writing, writing about your writing

To write whether the words in your writing are good writing
Therefore RIGHT writing

Or

Infact writing that ought not to have been written in the first place.

Now tell me

From this writing
And writing
And writing
And more writing

How do you write the words that you now want to be written?
Mateuš Conrad Apr 2017
.how does philosophy and psychology differ? well. psychology was spawned from having to focus on the "need" of a "learning" for writing: speak comes easy, writing, not so much. psychology is so easily spoken, philosophy isn't, philosophy is like a child talking to an adult when psychology / sophistry comes into play /
    refrain... how do i rephrase this statement?
      ah! philosophy is like a child talking to a child...
psychology is like an adult talking to a child...
psychology is a supertition of knowledge...
philosophy? a fear of knowledge.
  knowledge does not make happy people,
or gullible talkative types, either.

... the birth of psychology contra philosophy... the when sophia over-powered the philosophers with too many observation cues... maxims and aphorisms... la rochefoucauld & nietzsche... it began with a dialogue, it maintained itself in a solipsistic monologue... it ended up as advertisement slogans: maxims and aphorisms.... cute observations: seen, "seen" but never tested... i've seen the ugly side of psychology... it's psychiatry... the big pharma carousel and slurred sedative spreschen... try getting a slurred sedative spreschen out of me... i'll sock you... i'm this: )( close to the itch of throwing a punch, i almost forgot what implies: peace... me dancing on old college's (edinburgh) roof while listening to: the shins, new slang... that was peace...
  that was me: rooftop, night, moon,
and the lingo of limbs floating freely off my torso
and at the same attached to it...

       i once cared about a "double" chin...
i grew a beard,
stopped worrying about: when will i learn
the violin... fiddled with my beard
for a while and figured: not now,
not ever...
                much much more gracious
than fiddling with ***** hair...
after all: a beard is very much akin
to ***** hair...

          jordan peterson and the old testament...
right...
       if ever a cain...
  siberia looks like the ideal prison...
after all god said, or "said": let him walk off his sins...
hard to walk off your sins when caged...
siberia? perfect training ground...
all that ******* being sold, cain? a vegetarian...
abel? sacrificed animal flesh...
paradox... so... god... expected us...
to remain hunter gatherers?!
  cain was thinking ahead!
he sacrificed fruits and veg. and...
cain was like: we better start thinking about
morphing into an agricultural society!
god praised abel, the neanderthal hunter gatherer...
cain was like: but look! look! wheat! bread!
we can feed more people!
god said: hunter gatherer! abel! win win!
cain paid homage to god
via fruit & veg...
abel... via kosher blood sacrifices...
now... either i'm just plain stupid...
or god is a really bad fiction....
written up by circumcised men
who never learned to *******:
since: the obvious impediment restriction...

cain was a veggie... abel sacrificed animals...
mea culpa somnum... send this whole
died on the cross
          ergo saved ergo ergo
my fault ******* to sleep... i'm tired of this mantra
like an eskimo is bored of ice...
i'm bored of listening to semitic proverbs...
   i'm bored of their rubrics...
their: "fate-warnings",
their superstitions... a semite will forever remain
a semite for me: kippah-***-tonsure...
or a camel-jockey brigade... lucky them they settled
on a once grand mountain range
of Sahara that was the bed for oil...

oh look! wow! i can think for myself!
wonderful...
               which is what i always thought
would become reality...
i'd watch a video...
not comment,
                 and write a rebuttal...
                  which would fall on deaf ears...
or that sacred minority report...
i'll face it if you face it:
the monotheistic god of the semites...
is as ridiculous
as the poloytheism of the pagans...
      the monotheistic god of the semites
is just too... pristine...
     give too many omni- prefixes
to a being and he becomes, boring...
like superman...
                  and to still preserve intellectual
integrity within the ontological omni-
zoo?
                              hey! feel free!
       i much prefer to believe in a "god"
of a limited circumstance...
                  as the will of creation? sure: omni- etc.,
but as a spectator in the back of the minds
of the "created"? cameo presence...
hence not omni- etc.,
                  after all: free will is free will...
and it requires no divine intervention
in order for it to be proved...
  however bad it happens to be upon
embodiment...
    god was never a source of intervention...
the jews begged prayed lampooned for
that sort of god...
did it fare them well? i don't think so...
god was always a cameo for me...
   something i could rely on...
in terms of finding my grand jurisprudence
libra... when the human sense of justice
would disintegrate...
and i'd be met with the west saxon mantra
of: innocent until proven guilty...
or a jimmy saville...
  i was wronged,
no one will believe me,
fair enough...
                     at least i've found some source
of compensation,
for the time being,
before i believe: not to be reunited
with the dead loved ones...
but before i believe to stand
in the grand court of judgement...
with king Solomon as the prosecutor
.


do what the english language does, it uses
hyphens to create compounds...  just do this:
            object-object...
   would i **** it?                depends on the follow-ups
that constrict the two-way "system"
of re-appropriation
            with the german language...
it really is the new: north south east west
"copernican" discussion...
    the **** am i supposed to do
(as a male) with an object
     that's not object=object... because it isn't...
      or object≠object: well? because it
clearly isn't...
                      ****, bro?
                       can i get a hotdog instead?
yeah yeah, extra onions on top...
                            but write it out in
that natural **** schizoi fashion
    as post-german compounds... hyphenated,
but instead include the following variations...
      and put them up for a narcissus inspection
and ask: are they chiral?
               stress-free is a compound word...
           but it's easier with an object-object
compound... 'cos' then you can **** around with
object-object... object=object...
             object≠object...
                                object~object...­
                       object≈object...
                           and   object≡object...
it's close proximity, i gather, so it's hard to
orientate yourself as you might with 1 + 1 = 2...
                      but it's in english, and english is
prone to try and forget the norman conquest
and rekindle itself as: with a germanic origin,
and all that custard that modern german
looks like: i'd be sooner wearing sun-glasses than
actual optic magnifiers if i was found
reading german krupahunddoughchew...
                               or the likes of this fake example.
true transgender? it happens in the ≡ category...
the binary...
       it means: even though you're male
   and can't fulfil the female role of a reproductive
****** capacity... i'd still *******...
    joke's on me...
                 but otherwise? apart from the starting point
in the english language...
      the hyphen and compounding words
as is the "vogue" standard...
               so working from object-object...
and then including the stated variations
                       of a dualistic **** by dichotomy...
         ah man... i'm just talking about
how english is trying to resurrect its saxon
ancestors... what with creating these hyphenated
words... you're going to shove some
      other mathematical symbol in between
the two stated words and think of
                                  some grander schematics...
the death of the university coincided with
the death of the asylum...
                               evidently 2 + 2 does equal 4...
         but it's still a case of working
from object-object...
                            object/subject-subject/object?
north, east, west, south...
                      what the ****?!
                        we have modern neanderthals
roaming this place, and they're faking
  the status **** sapiens... that the hell can
evolve from that?
                    clear and bite-sized truth acknowledgement:
we're **** schizoi... split brained...
                     we've reached a stage where
we're not modelled by a multiplication impetus,
but an obelus impetus (÷)...
                       western society figured...
as **** similis: we have a billion chinese and
a billion blue indians of the raj...
                                why should we be bothered?
                isn't that the case of what's happening?
unearthing the nag hammadi library
                               and the whole transgender movement?
oi! where's the vatican! get those cardinals off their *****!
                                 white, red, purple, black.
pope, cardinal, bishop... priest...
           sure sure... brown....                          monks.
but we're losing a fight against neanderthal islam...
                   come your hungry, your oppressed...
your first cousin ******* retards.
                                         i know i'm taunting,
i'm taunting with a reason: neanderthal islam....
                 so much for history and gloating about it
citing the ottomans; thing is... i have lost the ability
to fear death... i'm actually teasing it, more and more,
day after day, after yet another day...
                          it's a bit like the reverse process of
castration... i'm feeling up pigs' genitals, saying:
      oh look! this porky can sign in #A!
                               quick! to the castrato oink corp!
yep... etymology... the alternative to reading
history.
menmarou Dec 2014
~Entry #1 12.02.14

Akala ko madali lang ang lahat. Ang yabang ko pa.. sabi ko mai-inlove din saken to. pero mali pala..
ako yung na-inlove eh.

Ang sakit pala, kasi ginawa ko na lahat ng kaya ko, lahat ng paraan para lang abutin siya, tulungan siya, kasi naiintindihan ko siya.. sobra.
Pero ang sakit pala kapag ikaw lang yung lumalaban. ikaw lang yung naghahangad ng happy ending, kasi sa dulo walang ganun, walang happy ending..
kasi nde pa siya maka move on.
ang masaklap pa nito ..
matatanggap ko pa sana kung yung mga umaaligid na babae kasi madali naman sila paalisin, pero yung kalabanin mo yung bababeng minahal niya ng sobra bago ka dumating..
nde ko kaya. ang sakit pala.
ang tanga ko kasi nde ko kayang magalit sa kanya, kasi hanggang ngayon naiintindihan ko pa din siya.
lintik na one sided to oh. nde ko alam na ganito pala kasakit ang mag mahal ng isang taong nde sayo..
let me rephrase that. taong nde magiging sayo
akala ko. yang word na yan, madaming namamatay diyan . isa na ako dun,
naniwala ako sa sarili ko na magiging okay ang lahat sa amin. pero nde pala..
ibang iba sa reality, kainis kasi eh napaka hopeless romantic ko kaya ayan kahit imposible sumugal..
pero nakita ko na kasi na ganito mangyayari eh,
nasa isip ko. "nde naman siguro ganon, kasi kahit papaano mahalaga na ako sa kanya, malay mo naman diba? mai-nlove"
Assuming din kasi ako, kasalanan ko din..
sa simula pa lang naman kasalanan ko na. Sinubukan ko kasi gusto ko siya eh. gustong gusto.
pero eto pa din ako, naghihintay, umaasa pa din ako kahit pinaliwanag niya na sa akin na nde pwede.
nakakulong kasi siya sa regret at pain in the past. sabi niya gusto niya lang daw ako "protektahan" lintek na.

Nasasaktan na ako eh. sobrang sakit.
welcome to SMP menma.
~unspoken feelings.
Sarah-Jane Platt May 2010
I cannot write a sonnet; it's too hard
To put such barriers around my brain
And thus I find my efforts often marred
Although I rephrase again and again
I cannot write a sonnet though I try
Through day and night; through winter, into spring
And even though I have no reason why
A ten-syllable line my thoughts won't bring
But now I wonder just what is so great
About this iambic pentameter?
And am almost resigned that it's my fate
That from the sonnet form I should defer
Yet, having spent so long in search of one
'Twould be a shame if it should not be done
Written as an "up yours" to an English teacher who said he bet none of us could write a proper sonnet that worked the way a sonnet should.
Mateuš Conrad Aug 2018
.reiteration... em.. you're not internet providers... are you?! the best you'll ever be, is, software *******... you're about as invested in hardware, as the mafia is invigorated by mainstream politics...******* wankers... you what?! huh?! censorship?! who's supplying you with the copper wires?! you?! ha ha ha ha! how about getting leg ***** by a mongrel tongue... and considering your type of companies, as, serious, "mediators"... no hardware... just a software monopoly... ******* **** wasps! you almost want to cannibalize their presence! like... ever taste bone marrow? these "companies"... are teasing a taste of bone marrow! i want to eat something... these, companies, forgot, that, they're, not, service, providers! d'uh! and they're making the dicta?! inch copper **** making all the rules... what rules?! they don't make the rules... they're not hardware enforcers! they block my presence, i subsequently return to over-exemplifying using the scissors, counter the computer! yeah?!

em...
but you're not BT...
British Telecommunications?
the hell is up with these
software nuggets?!
how can google,
facebook,
youtube, ban, someone...
when they pay...
for their hardware provider?
did, said companies,
pay, for the copper wires?!
i'm pretty sure the answer is
no...
    unless you've not been banned
by authentic internet providers,
but, rather,
banned by content creation
mediums?!
       **** 'em!
           **** 'em silly!
         they do not actually
own access to internet
provision, i.e. ACCESS...
they do not own
the armory
of copper wiring....
that connects the dots...
*******!
BT or SKY or ******
pulls the plug,
you're all out!
             you get the
differential "bias" against
the format of software
contra hardware?
no?
            there are,
internet, providers...
there is the hardware of
occupational hardware user basis...
these companies...
censoring...
have a software stature,
without a hardware status...
   want to rephrase the thesaurus
to concern yourself
with legislative phraseology?
      really?
     me? can't be bothered...
do it yourself,
VEGAN dietary requirements
and... whatever.
but you can't deny someone
content provision...
when they're paying for
an internet access...
these software companies
do not have to answer
to governments...
they have to answer
to hardware providers...
   internet access deposits /
access points...
            not governments...
hardware instigators...
    oh, really?
    software censorship?
   if there's no one using
the hardware?!
              good luck...
and a goof ball speeding!

these companies, who are exercising
"depth",
of the parameters of conscription
of legit consent?
   they have this amnesia...
this amnesia...
of...
   not being hardware utilities...
i.e.?
   a comic book...
without the printing press...
   savvy?
             now i'm mowing down
eyed
    claustrophobic eyed -
   horses running,
with shutters on their eyes
for the added advantage
of tunnel vision...
   that Bane scene equivalent...
    with the quote -
  crashing this plane...

"who" are these companies
to dictate,
"correct" internet usage?
they're not internet providers...
to begin with...
   if... a company like SKY...
or BT... or ******...
obstructed internet access
of a person?
  i'd be nodding...
    in a coherent access of
agreement...
    but...
      these websites are not
hardware, they're software...
see the difference?
they're not internet providers...
they're pixel blank bulk anticipating
canvases...

unless there's something
wrong with the original idea,
of an un- investigated
genesis of a pixel blank?!
     can i make this an issue
with your, internet provider?
i don't like you excluding
the content of the content
that is a blank pixel anticipatory
excavation wait...
   sorry...
  
   i don't like you miscarrying my
payment of internet access...
having censored interactive outlet
canvases...
   i pay for one... i pay for all...
   can you please pay
the proper amount of
compensation to the hardware
companies that provide
universal internet access to
the full spectrum of internet users?!

namely?
BT... SKY... ******?
yes?!
Mateuš Conrad Aug 2018
a bit like listening to
enya's take on the lord of the rings
soundtrack...
who, the ****, wouldn't
wish to drown, listening
to these Celtic mermaids?
i know i would...

the lunch?
salad....
  cherry tomatoes, fresh pepper,
fresh chillies...
      guacamole with chillies...
god, infused with lime...
greek goat's cheese...
           crunch iceberg lettuce...
and?
****... must have missed somethng...
well...
there was also prosciutto...
like i once said:
i hate bacon...
    prosciutto?
             give me a bucket-load
and i'll play the chipmunk...

   god i hate bacon...
ugh...
     it's lile eating gorilla turds
with a comparison
to what tuna steaks will never be,
and what smoked
salmon slices share with
prosciutto...

the bits that make a whiskey...
smoked salmon...
           if the Japanese will not
entertain salt in their sushi?
**** it...
we'll smoke the ******* out...

what a glorious statement of
attaching oneself to hubris...
  and the Celtic mermaids?
one question:
can i drown, right here and now?!
i want to drown!
i want to turn into a merman!
i want to cry!
oh god... for all eternity!
i want to cry!
i want to cry when
beauty is expressed so piquantly!

i want to be acknowledged
my by second mother, art,
who would never dare
to engage in the ancient greek
ritual of placing two coins
over my eyes to pay
Charon...

             oh sweet Celtic mermaids
from a missing Odyssey!
I.R.A.: punch the grieving
paw of the Anglican lion
surrendering
with a take on dentistry!

i want to drown...
   you songs turn the salty
seas into sugary fountains!
   i want to drown!
embraced by your voices
in the choir or the echoing
chambers of oyster shells!

   i never liked sushi to begin
with...
either the north sea smoked salmon
slices...
or the Baltic Sea raw herrings...

                 the English?
leave them...
   congregating on the money...
surmounting there sphere of influence,
the Atlantic Ocean that becomes
a pond...
   leave them... bestow a leverage of
stalling them...
         keep them comfortable...
keep them exclusionary...
  keep them: 50+ years too late...
that will buy us time...

           keep them sifting through rat ****...
we need them disorientated,
looking at a cul de sac,
rather than a road with, other, road
genesis injunctions
of what life, twist and burden turn
we have to share...

         now... i don't cry because
i'm sad...
      i cry... when beauty is made
sacrificial...
             and since so few cry at beauty?
i have to cry...
because?
  whatever is being regurgitated
mainstream?
   does not gravitate me
to the necessary emotional stratum...

all i can think of is...
  
               Celtic mermaids of Ireland...
and drinking buddies of Scottish
trans-gender kilt highlanders,
Welsh longbow men spies
   of Swansea...
   and the English?
guess it's just a case of talking:
"right across the... 'pond'"...
     like ******* are...
pond people my ******* god...

          i would have feigned the delusion
of... a shared tongue = a shared
cultural reference!
but in sudoku?!

   linear + sq. ≠ diagonal -

England and the U.S. and Australia?!
a dog barking up the wrong tree...
it always was, it always will be...

          i'll rephrase my concept
of England and America...
   being "specially" connected...
what? like retards?!

                        Pontius Pilate:
i'm washing my hands clean of the affair...

ask a Swiss... what he might have felt
about **** Germany!
no?
                           no what?!

      this country already constituted
a perfected allowance to deem my
ethnicity equivalent to vermin,
rats.... foxes...

     well... better this commentary
stays underground...
i wouldn't want some, ******,
reading this sort of wording;

mind you, he, it, she, they,
might forget it 10 minutes later.      

god, i hate bacon...
   but prosciutto?
                            as long as it's combined
in a salad...
  with fresh veg., and greek
goat's cheese...
    no, *******, problem!

SPRING ONIONS!
Vivek Dec 2012
For them who dwell in mindful wanderlust,
their love, the road; their home, the road,
To grapple their love, their home,
We dont give them their birth right,
cos we, the orderly chaotic,
they, allow me to rephrase,
say, keep order!!
To hell with the gatekeepers,
Let's hop borders shall we?
before all that's left to hop,
are landless latitudes!!
April Hapner Jul 2013
i am up too late w/o reason
a date in mind, i'll find the season...
to jump and sit back, relax.
as the waves of the day relapse,
the winds behind the drive,
to see a smile in innocence,
to repeat later in a over done line
of repetition, recognition, rephrase,
words recycled, garbled, rambled,
all in miscommunication
crying to help, choking down a shot of hope
but this is a end of a rope
severely torn and frayed
at the beginning or at the end
i cannot remember if a day or night
there is always more than enough light.
the engine in my jeep just went, and where we were-- to get a signal is the equivalent of hunting for a bar of service. Good Luck!
Aaron LaLux Jul 2016
Fck these words,
no one really reads much anymore anyways,
thought we were on the precipice of a Literary Renaissance,
but I was wrong we’re all too far gone to really care,

fck these words,
should’ve just shot a ****,
maybe then you’d at least give me a few minutes of your time,
maybe then I’d be able to get these thoughts into you,

fck these words,
maybe I should rephrase that,
make love with these words,
let me rephrase that,

fck these words,
fck politically correct,
Donald Trump is winning the election,
our country is the **** of a bad racist joke,

we’ve gone numb,
seen so many murders on the big screen,
that when our own character is assassinated,
we don’t even blink we just shut our eyes,
we will bring flowers to the funeral,
but we won’t tell them we love them when they’re alive,
we’ll write a beautiful eulogy once they’re dead,
but we won’t send a postcard while they’re still living,
lost my adopted father,
saw his wife and daughter cry,
and after missing two seasons of holidays,
I only came out to see him after he died,
and honestly it’s hard to feel connected to a black casket,
so I blocked out the white noise and read my eulogy,
then I flew back to Hollywood after the 21 gun salute in DC,
because I’m a narcissist and I think the world revolves around me,
but I am not the Sun,
I am barely even a son,
I just think I’m someone somewhat important,
because I’ve ****** out my words and thousands read my naked verses,

fck these words,
fck these fckn words,
I swear to God I’ll shut my MacBook for good,
pull that trigger and open up my mind maybe then I’ll be understood,

shock therapy,
self promotion,
suicide doesn’t answer any questions,
but it sure is an all-inclusive simple solution,

pollution,
in my atmosphere,
is there anything I can write,
that will really make anyone really care?

Seriously,
I’m asking a serious question,
share a few moments of your time with me,
and I’ll give you me entire eternity,

my heart is on fire and it’s burning me,
I need some fresh air,
I need some new hope,
I need to not need anything,
anymore,

I am a fckn *****,
I told you that before,
we all are in our own ways,
that’s the reality of this world,

and I try and write to find redemption,
because I’ll sleep with a *******,
then donate a thousand dollars to a charity,
I’m an unbearably uncontainable contradiction of virtues,

writing the madness of us all,
writing with the urgency of a conductor as his train careens off the track,
flying over the edge of a mountain cliff in slow motion,
getting out the final proses before it’s all over for all of us,

fck these words,
fck them until you’re sweating out all your pores,
until you’re coming over and over with these words,
until you become overly sensitive from overstimulation and you’re begging for no more,

until we are both exhausted,
laying there in the thick humid silence of a passed moment,
staring up at forever tunnel vision bright lights everything blurs,
and we become memories of our passed selves and all that’s left are these words…

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆
www.amazon.com/dp/B01I4621OE

Volume 1 of my new trilogy about Hollywood is now available worldwide.
I’ve decided to donate ALL of the profits of this new trilogy to three charities.
Volume 1 profits will go to a charity that prevents abuse and ****** assault on children.
Please support my new book and by doing so you’ll not only be helping prevent ****** assault,
but you’ll also be helping set an important precedent in making a statement to other artist,
saying that we all need to start giving back and helping each other more than we have.
PLUS you’ll also be getting an epic book of poetry from an epic best selling poet.
Let’s make charity cool and change the perception of coolness for the better.
Who cares what car you drive or what clothes you wear anymore?
What matters is what you’re doing to help those with less.
We live in this world together and can all give more.

It took me six months and thousands of dollars to create this trilogy in it’s entirety,
and all I am asking for in return is a few dollars and a few minutes of your time.
We made the last book I published #1 worldwide and we can do it again.
Simply purchase a copy now for less than it cost for a cup of coffee,
and/or PLEASE WRITE AN HONEST REVIEW about the book.
I’ve priced the book as low as I possibly could with Amazon.
And honestly If you really don’t have 3 dollars to spend,
at least REPOST this message,
or RESPOND to this message,
or something,
anything.
Love.


Here is the link for purchasing/reviewing the book:
www.amazon.com/dp/B01I4621OE
A frustration all  us writers go through...
Spencer Dennison Jun 2014
You aren't the first to walk these roads.
These lonely, gravel trails  covered in broken glass and nails.
Every time a rickety car breaks down and fails
it leaves it's wreck along the side of highway,
just watching the traffic pass them by.
They are monuments to every effort we have made and given up on.
They are why you MUST try.

Whether you live in a town or a city,
there are going to be some pretty ****** moments in life.
It takes a lot of strife to get a small amount of satisfaction
but the chain reaction
of doubts and down 'n' outs
is drowned out by the radio static and
I don't mean to sound dramatic but
I understand.

I just want you to know
you're not going to go on your own this time.
Every moment spent crying is time that could better spent trying.
If I told you I don't have these moments,
well, I'd be lying.
Because I've felt the color drain from my face
as I try to remember the last place I left my courage
because it's not at arm's reach this time.
Sneers and eyerolls draw spirals around me
like I'm at ground zero of an M.C Escher painting.

I can rephrase suffering so many ways.
But at this pace, I still can't outrun my own thoughts.
I find my courage at last
but there is no sticking place to ***** it to,
so I just say "***** it."
I can't say I knew it would end this way,
but if all this poem comes down to
is a whiny teenager trying to be edgy
than I guess I...
If you wonder why this poem drops off, just remember the title.
The moon shines down below
On us pathetic mortals
With nothing but malice to our name
And myths of love to counter those.
Love and hate aren't opposites
For they both display passion
Ground-breaking passion
But indifference. Indifference
Is where true evil lies
Then again, evil is but the absence of good
So let us rephrase,  
Indifference is like smoke to us humans
Flighty at best, comes and disappears.
Something we desperately try to hang on to
But it always slips away
Leaving nothing but a slight smell
As a reminder of the numbness
That was indifference.
In comparison to this,
Passion is like the tree
Which has deep roots
And has seen many a tale occur
If you try and remove it,
It will leave a crater, where it stood.
Lives that nested in it will be lost.
Left to fend for themselves,
Most will not survive the felling.
The ones that do, will flee
To something similar.
When these don't remain,
The earth will be in ashes.
So let us now place monetary value on information.
Let us return to the source,
Mining & prospecting that fertile intel seam.
To wit: WWII and G-2 shenanigans.
Wild Bill and OSS-capades,
Artificial disseminations.
Partial recriminations.
And PSYOPS:
A literary nightmare--
THE CYCLOPS from The Odyssey,
For example,
If you lack your own,
Your own personal Bogey Man.
Or men. For me:
Allen Dulles or Richard Helms.

The Intelligence Community:
It was a small tightly knit crew,
Less than battalion strength in 1942;
A few myopic soldiers,
Who, although could barely type,
Were still too cerebral to
Waste as infantry fodder.
It was a huge converted Army-green warehouse,
Space strategically partitioned,
Sectioned off into cubicle-like spaces,
By giant 4-drawer file cabinets
Standing tall like MPs,
Sentinels & Guardians,
Monuments to pre-electronic storage,
Data relatively comprehensive, and an
Archive secretive & intimidating.

Within the Army-green incunabula,
Scattered throughout the intel landscape,
Here and there a few commissioned officers,
A smattering of college psychology majors,
Personalities with predilections,
And penchants for mind games.
These self same WWII vets,
Would morph into Cold War Mad Men.
Stalwart, stouthearted men of Eisenhower,
And J. Walter Thompson,
De-mobbed, as they say in the UK.
Consumptive.
Self-indulgent,
Particularly when it came to the kids;
Children of the peace,
Called Baby-Boomers,
An entire generation enabled & destroyed.
Who would produce little of value
Except medical marijuana and
Coupons, clipped by that sober ruling class—
Fat interest-bearing college-loan portfolios
Held by that neo-Calvinist Elect: The 1%.
Fat cats one and all,
Loaded dice & canasta cronies--
In concert a stacked deck,
“Una mano lava l'altra.”
The words of my namesake--
My grandfather Giuseppe--
His vowels reverberating,
Rattling in my dreams.
Not friends, but
Fiends in high places, like
The Fed and dark liquid pools.
Thank you, Barack, for
Fooling us again.
For giving us
“Belief we can believe in.”

But I digress.
It was when the Government Secrecy Act,
In all its transnational incarnations,
Embraced capitalism in a big way,
Elevating the ideology to whole-Earth saturation,
Systemizing the ethos of Darwin,
Into one global Moby ****,
One solitary leviathan,
A multi-level marketing labyrinth,
Where wealth is the end game--
Greed: pure, unbridled & unrestrained.
Bond--James Bond—
Did his bit, supplying catchy
Slogans & tag-lines:
“For Your Eyes Only.”
“On a need to know basis.”
“Confidential Information.”
“Top & Ultra-Top Secret.”
“Hush, Hush & a Bag of Chips.”

The sealed letter sits in a locked drawer,
In that stout desk,
In the Oval Office
In The White House,
“To be opened by my VP in the event of my death.”
Another staggering work,
Of achy-achy-heart breaking genius,
The culture commoditized,
A disease containing its own cure,
Assayed, graded,
Portioned & packaged.
Priced accordingly,
To a logic that goes something like:
“Anything this tightly controlled,
Anything the government deems to be
This illegitimate and/or & secret
Must be really, really God-awesome,
Must really be Da ******* Bomb.”

Brother Coolidge was right:
“The Business of America is Business.”
And INFORMATION:
“The Most Valuable Commodity on Earth.”
So said Stanford Stuyvesant Whitehead III,
19th Century robber baron, and
Consummate Fat Cat.
Get the picture:
We were smoking cigars and sipping cognac,
Mighty comfortable in leather armchairs,
Muted billiard clicks,
Punctuating the atmosphere
In this spacious lounge,
His East Side
Downtown & private
Manhattan club.
I, his guest, had not the slightest idea
Why I was there.
"By God, man," he went on,
My eyes speared by his laser gaze,
His bushy eyebrows,
His monocle.
His bulbous nose;
His thick wet mustache.
And those EYES:  
Those crazy,
Insane eyes.

"I am talking about a profound change,” he continued.
“Back when the steamship
Gave way to electronic wireless radio."
He puffed smoke,
Removing the cigar from his mouth,
Holding it,
Examining it critically for a moment.
"I'm talking about communication,
Instant communication
With business associates, &
Cronies far away,
Way out there,
Far beyond the places we know well.
Picture it:
You're running a fleet of
Ramshackle Filipino banana boats,
Out of some nameless cove,
Indenting the south coast of Mindanao.
A cyclone comes out of nowhere.
Good God--there’s sixteen banana-packed
Coal burners lying on the bottom of the Celebes Sea.
Think about it:
You've got telegraph radio.
Everyone else has the post office.
Now, I ask you:
‘Who's going long,
Who’s getting rich on the
Caracas Banana Exchange?’
Good Lord, man, it would be
Like being omniscient!"
“This very conversation,” he went on,
“Could well be a verbatim transcription
Of a conversation right here in this very room,
Between people like: J. Pierpont Morgan
And some lesser Gilded Age nabob;
Some Astor, some Rockefeller,
A Gould or Vanderbilt,
Whitney or Duke,
Some Frick or Warburg--
To name just a few, old sport.”
He stopped suddenly.
He looked down at his hands,
As we both realized he had counted these names
Out on his fat curled fingers.
He looked at me and smiled.
I was afraid.
Why had I been invited to this meeting?
I smiled back at him,
Doing my best to mirror his
Carnivorous menace.

I knew it.
He knew it.
He knew I knew it.
Mr. Whitehead’s growling rabid jowls,
His slobbering canine smile held me steady.
“Okay. Touché. ‘Ya got me.”
He shook off the phony smile,
An absence, accentuating
His stare: lethal, carnal & rare.
“I never had much formal schooling.
I’ve been hungry.
Hungry enough to know for sure
That the correct fork,
Don’t mean ***** from shinola.
When I’m dining out, fancy-like,
Me manners is the least of me problems,
Far less important than
The dinner chit they
Hand me after I slake
My thirst & appetite.”
Again, he stopped suddenly,
Recognizing that, perhaps,
He’d revealed too much of his
Bedford-Stuyvesant pedigree.
He turned again and stared at me.
“None of that,” he said.
“None of that means squat to me, Boyo.
What matters now is I’m rich.
I’ve got mine, By God,
And ******* It!
Tough ***** on the rest of you losers;
The rest of you fecking whiners can go
**** yourselves over at Zuccotti Park.”
He pounded the armrest,
The padded armrest of the rich Corinthian leather—
( . . . ***, Ricardo?
Get your Montalbán
Mexicano ***, back in
Random Access Memory Land,
Where you belong.
**** ya’ Fantasy Island
Hospitality, Mr. Roarke,
Go be wrathful Khan Noon Singh,
Somewhere else.
Now is not the time, or,
Let me rephrase that:
This narrative will not allow your meme here . . .)    

Whitehead pounds the armrest again.
“My point is this:  
None of JP Morgan’s decidedly,
un-nattering lesser nabobs of negativity . . .”
BAM!  Again, he pounded the leather . . .

(Back in your ******* hole, Spiro!
Do you realize just how far back,
Just how far back
Maryland’s reputation
Has been set back by your venality?
Not to mention any shot at ethnic assimilation,
The rest of us grease ball non-Wasps
Have in this country?
You ******* Greek!)

I stopped thinking
When I realized Stanford Stuyvesant Whitehead III
Was reading my mind.
“So that’s what it’s really all about,” he said,
Rank smugness in his voice.
“So, I’m just a nouveau riche upstart,
A socially inept parvenu,
Yet they still let me
Join their tony clubs.
It chaps your ***, Boyo, don’t it?
I’m still Scotch-Irish, and
A WASP, Laddie.
Something your skinny
Greaser-Guinea-****-Spaghetti-*** ***,
Ain’t ever gonna be.”
But I digress, again.

So I joined one of Uncle Sam’s
Lesser-known clandestine services,
An assignment appropriate to my ethnic identity,
Namely GLADIO in Italy,
A NATO stay-behind operation &
Cold-War comedy.
I infiltrated the Brigate Rosse.
I drove the Aldo Moro kidnap vehicle.
I cooked minestrone for General Dozier.
I sliced off J. Paul Getty’s ear in Calabria.
Ironically, I lost my hearing during
The Stazione Bologna bombing.
I am consequently pensioned off,
Off both the radar and the payroll.
Years later now,
I live in one of those gated, golf-coursed,
Over-55, sunny southern California
Lunatic asylums.

Most days I am drunk at 9 AM.
I fill Bukowski mornings,
Conjuring up Jane Fonda,
Jazzercised in camo spandex.
She is high atop a Vietcong tank in Hanoi.
Or Daniel Ellsberg
Enjoying a second act in American politics,
Praising Snowden & Assange,
& Bradley Manning,
I summon up the ghosts of
Julius & Ethel,
Benedict Arnold,
Rose of Tokyo & Mata Hari—
And Ezra exiled at Rapallo,
And John Walker Lindh,
A Yankee Doodle Dandy,
Born in Washington,
District of Columbia,
By way of Afghanistan,
Taliban Americano,
Kangaroo-courted,
Presently residing at the
Federal Correctional Institution
At Terre Haute, Indiana.
Spies.
Traitors.
Saboteurs.
And Poets?
No longer capable of keeping secrets.
Desperate now to tell
The truth.
meana Jan 2018
putting back my pieces together. holding up and standing strong. i shouldn't be bothered anymore, i shouldn't care. i have to stop
ruthless
Poetic T Sep 2014
They said the wolf
Beware
But in truth it was not he
All should fear
Misunderstood
Stigmatised
Tainted
His name was mud
Listen,
Observe,
Eavesdrop,
On the words that growl forth,
Three,
Little,
Pigs,
They seemed so succulent,
"Wait rephrase that"
Those bacon bandits,
"Wait misunderstood definition"
Those  pink porkers
A triangle of terror they were
To me,
A birthday wish for their mother you see,
Fur, but fur isn't cheap
So a thought??
)POPPED(
In to there salty minds
A wolf could make not
One
Not
Two
But one for each.
"Are you still listening"
They planned, snorted
Laughed with glee, my end planned
By all three it seems
The first
Flame was his weapon
Straw
Tightly bound
Ablaze in my face
A circle
Straw,
Match
Fire
I had no escape it would seem,
But as I was pushing behind
A trap cleverly conceived
But I was not defenceless,
I
Huffed
&
Puffed,
And with an exhale,
The flame
Did extinguish
Was blown out,
Embers lit up the sky,
As a pig now in my sights
"Gulp"
"GUlp"
"GULP
And smile upon my face
As I huffed and puffed
Inhaled
All that surrounded,
Inhaled,
Exhaled,
Everything out
Piggy was now floating in air
"One final inhale"
And piggy was hanging by his pinkies
Inside of  my wolfs mouth
"This little piggy was  naughty"
"This little piggy used his  mouth"
"One final piggy down the  hatch,"
I licked my lips and that was that.
I walked along now knowing their plan
And by a whisker
It just missed
Matrix style dodges
Ensued
Wooden spears
Shrieked past,
Out of the corner of my eye
"I saw him"
"A glint in his eye"
As Ten wooden spears
Launched,
Flight,
Shards,
Of stick rained down
"Was this my end"
?
?
I
Huffed
&
Puffed,
And these sticks paper cut
My nose then
In to the wind they flew
Have you heard a piggy
Squeal,
Scream,
Oink
All in one exhale its not pretty
As spears one and another
Encircled my porky Friend
His pink now white with fear encircled
"No way out"
"Pinkie"
He smiled I inhaled
And once again a piggy held on
To my snout
Eyes watering I  said
"This little piggy was  naughty"
"This little piggy used his  mouth"
"One final piggy down the  hatch,"
I licked my lips and that was that.
"I hope your listening"
I growled
It was him or me I would be
Fur upon a back
So used my senses
Sight,
Hearing,
Snout,
But he was no where to be found,
I looked for this bad bacon
High
&
low
So I went home to ponder
"Was it over"
I sat in my chair,
Then a brick through my
Window did appear
Come out and play
I scratched my head??
"Why not just knock the door"
As I went out side
A castle of brick and stone
At the bottom of my garden
"Impressive I say"
"Did I just say that out loud"
You may have eaten
One pig,
Two pig,
But you'll not get the desert,
I
Huffed
&
Puffed,
And down the phone I shouted
To the council of the land,
"Permits"
"Height"
"Private land"
And with that the castle came down
There is more than one way
To get a piggy off my land
As they left, the piggy snuck off too,
"Where are you going piggy"
"Unfinished business me and you"
It was them they made
Me do it,
Then a growl came forth
And two voices spoke
One little piggy
"It was his plan from the start"
Then a second piggy spoke out
"He set you up, as well as us"
The piggy startled
Voices echoed out
"Really"
I spoke
Yes my plan he snorted then laughed
"What you going to do"
I
Huffed
&
Puffed,
And blew my wind out
Have you ever seen a
Piglet role down a hill
The noise was like
Oink
OUCH
Oink
OUCH
And with that  I
Inhaled,
And the bruised and battered piggy held
On to my whiskers
Eyes watering,
Nose dripping out,
"This little piggy was  naughty"
"This little piggy used his  mouth"
"One final piggy down the  hatch,"
I licked my lips and that was that
"I hope your still listening"
My belly rumbled
It was what I had eaten
Not agreeing with me
I went to the
Jailhouse
Slammer
Lockup
For this is where
They were regurgitated,
And Spat out, these
Three
Little
Pigs
Would be doing
Twenty five
To
Life,
In a prison of jackals
These little pigs are going to have
A hard time sweating salt,
Fear in there eyes instead of mine,
"Are you Listening"
What you thought I'd eaten them??
I'm a vegetarian for goodness sake
I licked my lips but *
bacon does taste nice...
My heart's ablaze
I'm so amazed
cluttered in clichés
in a daze
I'm dismayed
too many long driveways
Life's fortes
as we graze
upon the gaze
in a haze of haze
trapped inside this maze
our voices phase
into the next of days
Oh did we raise
with utter rephrase
glancing sideways
into stairways
how I hate your ways
as much as I hate causeways
too much decay
along the edgeways
inside the hallways
roadways
screenplays
my heart strays
on into Sundays
and Tuesdays
I hate the weekdays
they're gateways
into other days.
© 2012 Christina Jackson
Pardon this poem for not making much sense, practicing wordplay. I chose a particular word, such as the one used here, "days", and use any word that rhymes hereafter. You can choose to continue until you can rhyme no more, or add in another word and keep it rolling. Like I said, it's only for practice. I highly recommend using this website http://www.rhymer.com/index.html when you do these exercises.
night child Dec 2013
I like crying
Because I'm not allowed to
But since I'm not allowed
I
Can't.

Since you said
That crying isn't good
I physically can't do it
Even when  need to
Even when I have to
Even when I want to

And when I do
I burst
Every feeling that was trapped
Explodes in rage
And they come out all at once

I don't try to hide the pain
Trust me
I want to let it out
I like the feeling
Of drowning in my own thoughts

When I was a child
I sat in my closet
And wrote in the diary
As each word was written
I flew farther and farther away

At that point
I only wrote when I cried
So I could let my tears
Fall on the pages
To 'prove' my sadness

I liked-
rephrase.
I like being sad
It could be because
It reminds me that I'm still alive

I still picture her
When she came in
She dragged me out of the closet
And sat me on my bed
My uncomfortable bed

She snatched my book
Skimmed through the pages
And pointed at the smudges
They messed up the words
Plus they were circled with black ink

So I gave a simple answer
"Those are my tears"
I glanced at my book
In her clammy hands
"I circled them to remember the pain"

Hugs
Are supposed to be nice, right?
Well I hated her hugs
They were rare
But I didn't miss them anyway

She softly said
"Aweee"
Then walked out
So I went back into my closet
Where I can sit in darkness

She left my diary on a shelf
And I haven't touched it since
But I always remember the circled tears
And when she sat in awe
Adoring my sadness

She made me believe,
That sadness is loved.
Angie Acuña Jul 2015
I love children.
Okay let me rephrase that:

I love children that aren't mine.

I have abso-positively-*******-lutey no responsibilities attached to them.
They didn't leave *my
body completely wrecked.
They don't look at me and call me "momma"
or any other variation of the name
and I love that
because frankly,
children scare me.

Okay let me rephrase that:
The idea of ruining a child's life scares me.

First off:
I wouldn't think my newborn child is beautiful.
Newborns look like potatoes and I don't particularly find potatoes attractive.

Secondly:
They'd have a name that haunts them in their sleep.
I named my dog Legolas after gorgeous Orlando Bloom in Lord of the Rings so don't try me.
I will name them Harry ******* Potter without batting an eyelash.

Thirdly:
I will be brutally honest with them.
When they ask me why the sky is blue,
I will say that I don't know.
I didn't pay attention enough in school to know.

When they ask me why some boys kiss boys,
I will say that it's perfectly normal.
Mommy probably kissed some girls and boys at some point in her life.

When they ask me why the little girl in their 2nd grade class comes to school with
bruises on her arms,
with her hair in two pigtails,
a smile on her lips,
but fear, loneliness, and heartbreak in her eyes,
I will say that some people in this world don't deserve Angels.
They don't deserve to be alive at all.

When they ask me why they don't ever see their great aunt Perla,
but hear her name whispered at family events,
I will tell them to ask the little girl in their 2nd grade class.

Fourthly:
They will learn to clean house, top to bottom,
The way my momma taught me.
They will hate it.
Then they will hate that they love it.

Fifthly:
I will argue with them every step of the way until they can learn to hold their own.
But until then,
No, you may not have $60 to go shopping.
Unless you're buying books or music.
Then you can have $100.

Lastly:
I will teach them to love.
My love for them will be overbearing, smothering, and unwavering.
This is how they will love their children.

But when they finally ask me what love is,
I will smile,
bittersweetly,
and say that love is...

Love is drowning in the ocean,
gasping for air that never quite reaches your lungs,
but when it does,
it hurts
because water doesn't belong in your lungs.

You can't help breathing the water in, however.
You just want it.
Want something to fill you, to overwhelm you.

Love is repeating this, over and over until one day,
the breathing
doesn't hurt anymore.

There is no more water in your lungs.
Just air.

There is water still, all around you,
but you are not drowning anymore.

You're swimming.

You, my dear, sweet, beautiful, hypothetical child,
are swimming!

*which is something that I have yet to do.
Why. Is. This. So. ****. Long?????
*it's sucky but I wanted this to be spoken word lol*
Delta Swingline Apr 2017
"Rereading her texts doesn't bring her back from the dead."


And I'm dead anyways. So read my texts all you want.

Somebody pick a fight with me. Set this all ablaze and watch the photos burn.

No.

I can't do that. I will not give the world the satisfaction of being right about me. That I'm this monster...

Rereading her texts doesn't bring her back from the dead.

But she's not dead.

So let me rephrase:

Rereading her texts... doesn't bring her back.
Cowardice is my middle name.
Alice Burns Sep 2013
I have to be more careful with my words
Or rather the wording of said words
I have to take a leaf out of your book this time
Instead of slamming it shut each time you open it before me
Despite how ludicrous and unbelievable your avoiding answers are
There are only so many ways I can rephrase the question
Before insanity beats honesty by numbers from the infinite variations
So I'm not giving in quite yet as I said in frustration
And although from our argumentative conversation I failed to learn
I was in fact enlightened, brightened, given light
For my answers and questions stand strong and unchanged
Strengthening in stillness at every returning question you fire

I may not be the Right, I may not have the Right
Your belief might be silenced
My belief may be misunderstood
And though no result came of words spoken
And methods remain unsuccessful
The conclusion is always the same despite the uncountable alterations
So as I close this file to open one unfamiliar
I sign off with three last words
I am right
Michael Crowley Jul 2011
On good nights, I like to send messages to space, outer
or deeper though direction and dimension are lost on me.
I get answers but no translations, no key or stone to this alien
and spacy thought.  What?  You say you bet you could

rephrase space in a language even I could understand? After all
you passed algebra, walked around school a big shot, finding X
or its equals. I should have paid attention, but mine was fixed
on Linda, Lucinda, Corinna, Corinna where you been so long?

I might have learned the meaning of words from long forgotten
gods, frustrated issuing commandments, ok in their day, but
ignored now, passé.  I was absent for those god talks, apocalypse-isms,
missed out on saints with half-moon halos and beatific visions.

I heard only rumors of women, words like smitten, enchanted,
obsessed with love like striated bark on trees, canals on Mars,
rain and that sound that creeps under sod.  And so I wait
for an unambiguous, intelligible answer from anyone in space.
Don't promise me you'll stay forever beside me
Don't promise me that we'll bind the lose ends with gold
Don't promise me happiness

Tell me the truth
Tell me how you hate waiting for me when I'm late for our dates
Tell me how you wish we'd never separate
Tell me how you wish I'd never gaze upon another guys figure but yours
Tell me how you envy seeing  me with guys unknown and known to you
Tell me that you'd hate to lose me one day
Tell me how my beauty has nothing to do with me and you being together
Explain how it was never love at first sight because the moment you saw me, it was just like meeting any other random being
Tell me how I had you smiling as I tried too hard to cheer you up and every joke of mine was lame
Tell me how every girl hates me because of our love
Share with me how you hate the chocolate I always thought you loved
But you were silenced only because you loved seeing the smile on my face as I handed it to you convinced that it is your favorite

Now let me remind you :

LOVE is nothing but true emotion, I feel for you
This is why I tell you that I love you
But I do not expect it to be thrown back to me with letters foreign to its spelling like Luv or symbols <3
I do not appreciate the disrespect for the word as that carries your attitude towards me too
Is it hard for you to say it out right?
Its LOVE
Now tell me what forces you to engrave such words of value to me, falsely?
Once again if you do not feel the emotion of love for me
Tell me, don't pretend you "love" me  
Tell me that you only "like" me
Love and like differ but that's another tale  
Be honest
Tell me the truth

Don't hand me promise in gold
Don't try too hard, be yourself
Your speech should not be provoked by my emotion, tell me your feeling honestly
Be realistic

I don't like these comparisons used to describe our love
Its too cliché
Feels like we trying to please media,
Seems like we aim to become one of their materialistic couples

Be yourself !
Tell me how you hate spending most of your time committing your lips unto mine
Tell me how you wish to just hold me in your arms
Not forever though because my heart won't beat faster to the misleading words of your charm
You'll just make me wonder whether words carefully chosen like those aren't said to many who have come before me

Let me share a secret with you:
I hate the feeling of being in love
No let me rephrase that
I hate the symptoms that carry on for like a month or two:
The feeling of loving you more than you do
The feeling of missing you more than you do
Thinking about you more than you do about me
Ending up with your name tattooed right onto my left ring finger
I hate it,
I hate it all
Its all crazy, weird
Really makes me feel like a fool
Like an amateur stepping into unknown territory
Or like a child lost in the presence of beautiful nature.
But I've grown up, I've seen nature spike venom into my veins, I've heard it all
I've seen it all
All I crave for is:
Honesty,
Real life love
Real love
ivory Jun 2010
The very first line of the very first chapter ****** me in
And grabbed me like Freddy in my dreams and wouldn't shake me away until I had barely enough energy to wake up
Between chapters the pages were stapled together
Skipping so many so many many page numbers they all blurred together
And formed a weightless insignificant half & half story
Faces and voices and quotations
Forgotten then regained in new perspectives through new lips and emotional injections
The story stays predicted with some adjustments
Reading from the same script every ******* time
All those run-on sentences are continuously recycled
And you will choke them back up with every girl you bring up
And then drop them down down the rabbit hole black hole where am I and how did i get here
All that remains the neon highlighted favorite parts
At some point in the story it must've meant something
But after the ****** we just all fall apart in our heads
Trying to puzzle it together and giving up and finally walking out the door
Ripping the staples and paper flies everywhere
Like paper airplane love notes thrown and cutting hands just reaching for one last hold
Language is multi-dimensional and the angles from which they're read
The lost pieces have lost their place
Lost in time somewhere back there wish I could have stopped it and danced within
So the end wouldn't come
If endings are just beginnings than you are infinite indeed
Because you won't stop rewriting this book you are trapped in
You eat words for breakfast lunch and dinner
And then hold your stomach after it's so completely filled you want to burst
And wonder why you ate so much of them
When you are the author of this never-ending tragic story
But you'll still pick it up again and start over for each warm smile and rephrase everything
Make it seem like it's the first you've ever read with fresh born eyes
But the repetition will drag and you'll need some action
It's never enough or it's too much
I'm never enough or I'm too much
But at least I can say I was in there before I was expectedly torn out in insecure panic
Stapled shut out of sight and out of mind
How many different versions of this plot have you told by now...
How many of them were worth the waste of breath
Because I was pretty ******* sure I was worth at least maybe a ******* pronoun
I capitalized to strengthen you and I was edited out all the same
You're stuck in a labyrinth walking aimlessly and waiting just to find another dead end
Leaving everyone anxious but no one convinced now that you speak true
When you've weaved in so many dreams and science fiction
How will you ever know what is real
If you won't let yourself trust anything
I was real and I was trust
But the world is fake and plastic like blonde Barbie dolls
And only the artificial temporary flavors of things taste the best.
© AlyssiaAnderson

Awkward reactions encouraged.
sobroquet May 2013
Often the news gives me the blues
I really ought to choose
to simply refuse
I mean really, what will I lose

Schadenfreude?
no that isn't it
truth is stranger than fiction
more like a fascination with the surreal
or a blinded  self-affliction with the scroungy real deal

Talking heads  that speak for work
punctuate sentences with erratic  head jerks
nobody normal talks that way, they ask  rhetorical questions
when the answer's are known, they’re killing time
“rephrase the question, run the clock  out
a commercial will spare us the embarrassment of doubt.”

Take’s a special person to face each new day
with zillions of prying eyes  hanging on every word you say
the mendicant voyeurs  of utter destruction’s  charming new  day
the slashing  machete melt down of the abject speakers foray
"Oh say, can you see  by the dawns early light"
What's become of your people  and their obsession with fright
desensitization  is paramount  to  achieve  an abeyance of light

Frankenfoods, and "side affects" hideous monsters in the making
high resolution mayhem require victims for the taking
awaking half-dead like Dracula’s  each dusk
they'll find a cure, there's another vaccine, there’s always dumb luck
maybe you won't be the sucker that makes that dreadful scene
bludgeon your mind with a another  faker, a different fresh  news team
fobbing  your leery eyes you ponder “they can’t  possibly all be  the same!”
different day, different month, different  year, same game
Raven Feels Jun 2021
DEAR PENPAL PEOPLE, looks like far is better than the unknown:\


I rephrase I say again haunted by the devils
God is unfair sorting mindlessly things for innocent souls to rebel

why should I be in a no landing deprive ???
of a sunlight in a stream of shallows and happy cries

chains and chords struck my nights would
like a movie scene I want like a music video in snow-none should

guess core in me is blinded in tomorrow edged with rage
seems like I'm the one one hurting myself not them in that cage

belting on drums my heart writes it explodes
far from the cheers and the spotlight affection in the feels I showed

for a ****** serenity in hatred
I hope blood shedding no stays in me sacred

no November curses left to decay a fatal I
no tears left to shed tearing in time


                                                          ­                      ------ravenfeels
Nat Lipstadt Jul 2014
As the surface clouds cleared
and the sovereign sun arose
My perspective was no longer fixed
on what lay below
Yet on what awaits before me…..the unknown.
I fly, with the rocky shoreline behind me.

Maria

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

the emperor of the solar system
demands obeisance
but for half of our life
ceding us to the
super moon's sequestration,
a velvet coated, cosseted,
the other-half-of-a-lifetime
remainder reminder
of the divide no poet
can supersede

yet, even these planet pulling,
tide churning bodies
are eclipsed,
their torrented powers
have human
shortcomings

orbits prescribed, predictable,
they too can only look down
upon us and wonder
what if and what lays beyond
their lawful curves

but I can look
up* to you
watch you, human,
so powerful are you!
you, you, you
can reset your course,
irrespective of tides, gravity

I can watch you
rephrase your life,
knowing that my eyes  
cherish what ere,
before in time,
what will be your
course selection

as I write,
I wonder if
my thoughts sufficiently
clarified,
do they require editing?

no matter,
the way they fall is
how they'll be served

I live with the same orbs,
and the winds that lifted your wings,
changelings of perspective,
now but the breeze that coats me,
were the hot air currents that lifted you,
now here, days later,
my genlest cloak,
as I inscribe to you

and the waters that I see,
not lapping today,
but modestly erupting,
the same Atlantic green
you have seen days pre-me,
but my shoreline sandy,
rocks removed,
for your comfort,
awaiting your arrival

the woman sends the seagull,
French Toast is ready,
(one piece, that talkative white bird's commission)
coffee hot n' salted
all ready, prepped to your taste

and for some reason random,
clueless why on, in my Long island offshoot sheltered isle
tears wave over my cheeks,
which I must erase/disguise,
before the repast begins

Surprise!
How came thee to be at our table?
How good the meal will taste,
now that you chosen to fly/stop by!

and this gibberish nonsensical
cup of words
is your welcoming present,
for here,
humans are the sovereigns,
and the celesetes bow to our wishes,
we select our own direction,
regardless of how the orbs try our souls,
we are most powerful human,
sovereigns of our selves
Cam E Jan 2014
when i was little, i dreamt of being a princess
because taking charge is what i do best
and why not do it in a long pink dress?

i may not be royalty but i am royally *******
by being an overemotional teenager who ...
listens a bit too much to what society says
and not enough to what she has to say
about herself

i feel like that needle in a haystack
when it comes to the future.
i’m still asking if i can use the bathroom
when i’m expected to have my whole life planned out
by the time the leaves start to change
and i have to surgically remove my arm to sell on the streets so four years from now i’m not living on one ... with nothing but a fancy degree held above my head when it rains the cold realization that i am $100,000 in debt
and have no idea what i’m doing


so what am i supposed to do
when i still find myself comparing who i am now,
to who i could have become
without the challenges of 2012
still hanging on my shoulders


when i lay in bed at night,
thinking about how different i would be
if life hadn’t thrown me a curveball
that knocked me off home plate and out of my comfort zone,
out of the dreams of an ivy league school or graduating with high honors -
when i’m just lucky to be graduating on time.

while my peers are getting acceptance letters,
i’m getting the reminder that the battle has just begun,
the war of me against myself in accepting the past as it is,
regretting my mental disorder will not make it go away no matter how hard i fight.

i know that forgiveness equals growth,
a never-ending road of
constantly changing
twisting and winding
paths that never seem to have any clues
as to which one is the right one.

i’ve blindly picked a path, a quest if you will.
i am on a quest to be the best
no no, let me rephrase, MY best
because my best is all i can give and someday,
those that told me otherwise
will be eating those sugar coated words
when i have finally accepted MY best is true success.

so when i was little, i did dream of becoming a princess
but today, i’m dreaming of being a better me than yesterday
storm siren Dec 2016
I write word after word after word
Backspace backspace backspace

Not good enough.

Needs to be

Better.

Isn't that how it always is,
Though?

Wanting to be better
And better
And better than that.

Nothing is good enough,
Right?

You rewrite and rewrite
And change your clothes
And change your clothes again.

You make a cup of tea,
But there's too much honey,
So you drink it and make it again,
This time there's not enough.
I swear the only reason I stay hydrated
Is because I keep remaking these cups of tea.

And I go and change my clothes,
And I rewrite and rephrase that sentence
And then that scene
And then this stanza,
And then I change my clothes again
All in hopes
To be better
Than before.

When will I be good enough
For myself?
Enough that I am even
Good enough for you?

Too casual, change into something cute.
Too cute, change into something ****.
Ugh, why bother?

The fear of never being good enough
Eating away at my brain,
And my brain screams and cries
Striving at perfection
That I'll never
Achieve.
I grew up knowing we are a broken race,
A race that changes smiles to frowns on everyone's face,
A race of pity, a race of self destruction,
A race of slaves, a race of savages.
I grew up knowing that we are the poison to the sea,
Acid to the earth
And pollution to the air.
I grew up embarassed of my colour,
Embarassed of my Nation,
Embarassed of my Continent...

I guess I didn't know better
That one day I will discover of our Greatness.
I discovered that our forefathers walked all four corners of the Earth.

Let me rephrase that...

Our forefathers were acknowledged in all corners of the Earth.
I discovered we were once tutors of the world,
We were once Astronomers of the stars,
Travellers of Mother Earth,
Doctors to the sick
And Founders of great kingdoms like Cambodia, parts of Egypt, America etc...
We were founders of some of the world's oldest civilisations,
The olmec vivilization.

African child, how far have you fallen?

I get so much joy and pride when I look back,
Back beyond the slave's era,
Further before the missionaries,
The beauty I see.
I am overwhelmed by the greatness of our Africanism.

Where did it all go wrong?

We have such great history
But it all sounds like a myth or a mystery
Especially when I say that we once walked tall and high in the foreign lands of America,
Not as slaves but as residents and rulers.
Our history shouts of our greatness,
It tells us that the first man to be saluted as Emperor of China
Was the son of the soil, the son of Africa.
Our history tells a story of our existence in India,
Our great kingdoms in Cambodia and Scotland.
Our history even goes back further to the ancient times of the Bible.
It speaks of ******, a great man in the eyes of the Lord,
The father of Cush, the founder of Cushite, a black nation.

It saddens me to see us disrespect our elders like this
For they hold our rich history.
They hold the bridges we have forgotten,
They hold the secrets of our Nation.
They were there when mama Africa gave birth to us
And we will weep when mama Africa swallows them up.
We will not cry for they have gone
But we will cry for the knowledge we have buried.

If you don't believe me ask the sage Ntate Credo Mutwa.

Wake up Africa. Wake up and Rise...
Rise African Child!
Poetry In Motion
IG: rapnapoleon_za
#DearSelf
#Bang4Lifé
J Arturo Feb 2017
When the sweat is dry on my brow
I will get up.
I'll be able to focus then better, I think.
The sweat is linked to a general malaise,
where objects drift in double shapes...
Not unpleasantly.
But smarter, I think, to stay. At least,
Let the pupils dilate, and left eye
Recalibrate it's aim.
The salt and sweat malign the eyes,
which either slip too fast past the the target,
or arrive a bit delayed.

You said:
Maybe we'd be happier if we moved on with our lives.
You're seeing something in Iowa that was likely there all along.
And the more I feel like you could slip away
I become more paranoid and afraid.
Wondering now who you're with,
Whether this path ultimately leads to my replace.

Though maybe we both agree, then, with what you said.
I can't hang on to something that long got on a plane and left.
Or try and **** through wires the delusion of a scent,
that dissipates, reductively, with every breath.

Though I will rephrase, in my own way,
the sentiment I think remains:
It would be more prudent to
Let the nose and lungs to rest.

         Let us be ungreedy with breath.


If you move on I will let you pass.
I cannot hold you within me,
And these cavities have not the space.


         But I will taste your color again, perhaps,
         In the wind, a laugh,
         The wet heat of a lovers face.

         I will taste your color again,
         In the wind, a laugh,
         The wet heat of a lovers face.



If you move on I will let you not just pass but
dissipate.
And rebuild a more modest faith:
Just once, to inhale again something like what went.

(And still remember what it meant.)
Leseywut Mar 2016
All I hear from the outside are muffled sounds. There are cars honking and people chatting but I am too focused with the idea of you being here, of you making sounds while you play with your cat. So, let me rephrase that. I hear everything that’s happening outside but I choose to hear you in my mind.

Everything is foggy but I am not anywhere near dizzy. Everything is foggy. I can’t remember the place where I come from before all these. Everything is crumpled into a piece of paper where I let my heart bled before you happened to me. Everything seems to be scary with the loud people and beeps of vehicles. I won’t ever take on risking my life for anything except here, in this place where you and I exist. Maybe from now on I will be.

This place must be big to fit the furniture and stuff you have but with you and I inside it just seems to shrink into a size of a doll house. It couldn’t contain what we feel that I can hear your heart beating from a meter. I will just try my best to pretend I am not staring at you with my peripheral vision. I will pretend that I can’t see you gazing at me with those mellow-painted eyes. I will pretend that you can’t hear my heart beating all for you. If I surrender, and I submit, we could both get into trouble.

Don’t laugh. I know we both can see everything from here. The curtains are closed but we have eyes to see beyond. That’s how we found each other’s arms. That’s how we ended up here. I repeat. Don’t laugh for the curtains may be closed but we both know we have audiences waiting for us to end this show.

For now, you may laugh. We both may laugh with sugar on our tongues and words as our cape. I have just one last request of you. May you never get tired of seeing my light that you’ll choose to open the curtains and I promise you. I’ll never dim this light to give to another except you.
brooke Oct 2012
I can't stand not knowing
when you don't speak and
i am unsure what you are
thinking when you're quiet
when you don't answer my
questions directly you wait
till later and at that point I
do not even remember what
i had asked in the first place
you make this funny face at
things I say so i rephrase and
stutter because i assume that
I sound stupid or naive or any
other kind of adolescent feeling
then i have this instant urge
to spill all these thoughts at
once let the floodgates break
and dump all my psychological
waste on you but i have to
remember that that is what
drove everyone away in the
first place so instead...


So instead, I remain silent.
I watch your fingers and watch the movie.
With all these thoughts rampaging through my mind in a single sentence.
Whichever relationship made me afraid of talking, I'll never know.
(c) Brooke Otto
elizabeth Mar 2015
I still do not have words for you
and my silence in the restaurant
was not due to speechlessness
or too many thoughts
trying to force their way out

I have just run out of ways
to rephrase the sentences
I say to you
every time
we do this

It doesn't hurt any less
and I still haven't lost
my will to fight for you
but I have learned
when to save my breath with you
because I know there will be
another time
when you will take it away
Isabella H Aug 2013
Do you think of me?
I'm dreading the thought,
Over and over again,
There's no insecurities,
just curiosity,
I stated the truth,
never implied,
meant for you,
only you,
your's to keep,
realism put into countless sonnets,
Literal and figurative,
I can only say and do,
All that I want to see,
All that I want to touch,
All that I want to feel,
All that I want to hear,
All that I want to love,
All that I want to miss,
All pointing to you,
Shall I rephrase it again?
All I can think ,
is of you,
I wonder again, do you think of me?
My dear,
Spoken like a letter,
a note filled with warmth,
I ask openly,
Is it wrong?
I stumbled upon you first sight,
Help me answer this question,
Because,
missing you never hurted so much,
until now.

— The End —