I was a child once
And it was truly, truly fun
I had dinosaurs for company
And when I was free, I was a Power Ranger
With the rest of the elite team in blue, green, pink and yellow
And I was the special red.
I swam through great seas and turquoise water
With mermaids
And talked to princesses while I skipped away on an adventure
If I had magic in me, I could live as a child again.
And I wake up, this fine day
The sky is blue, strewn with wispy white clouds
Floating away, above my head
Far, far away.
I wish, Please, just once
Take me away
From this boring world I despise to live
In because
It’s not the way it used to be
And everything’s so much harder
When you know you have to be so alone
And no one’s going to help you along the way, because, just because, you reach a certain age
And people expect of you to behave in a most ‘mature way’, and that you couldn’t believe in what you
Used to believe in
Those magical stories, those boundless wild imaginations of how the world’s going to be
like
And of how I could achieve anything I wanted, and most of all
I was free.
I want to live again, be free
So that I didn’t have to listen to all those expectations of society and experience
changes, horrible changes that I go through during puberty
Those changes really ****.
And people expect me to know about ‘reality’ and that you can’t achieve your dreams even if you tried really hard
But I know that they’re only saying that because they want to reach out their hands towards the night sky,
Enclose those stars which are the burning flames, my wildest, craziest ideas and dreams
And extinguish the fire, because once, their stars died too, in the same
Cruel
Way.
I try to forget about all this, and imagine a most beautiful place
I breathe in the air; it’s fresh and so clean
I try to think of this:
A cozy little mountain, topped with white, cool snug blankets
Of crystalline snow, a gathering of piney, tall giants
And then also, another mountain, but cows graze
Over warm, soft, so soft
Of grass, like milk slowly running down the mountainside and making everything it touches feel smooth
A cool breeze comes this way, carrying scents of far away
Valleys of mountains stretch for miles and miles, into the distance, the sign of a slowly rising sun
A tiny spill of a light pink inkbottle on a parchment of lavender and sunrise orange
I slowly see pixies hiding in their hollows and a dash of green flashes by!
Could it be, a Power Ranger? Saving the world from evil monsters and dictators
And clad in Stylish Spandex.
Slowly, like a small somersault in the air
I rise and the breeze lifts me off the soft green carpet
I can fly.
My first destination-the mountains and I sing as I go:
Here I come, my precious cones
Of snow and trees and mountains trolls
Wherever you’re hiding I’ll find you there
Better get hiding, trolls, and beware!
I’ll slide down your ice caps and into the sea
Where I’ll swim with the fishes and mermaids who’ll greet me!
With their angelic voices, harmonious in tune and melody
And their dances under the sea, with such elegant beauty!
Here, a shark has corals for dinner
fishes waves at me as I swim by!
I become a dolphin, with lengths I swim
Up, down, Up, down
In synchronizing rhythm of the bobbing waves
With a great, big, final leap
My first ascend towards the light blue, sprout wings, fairy wings, ones with glitter and pink and more shiny things
Am I finally free?
I can go where none as gone before-
Into dangerous caves and rivers and seas
carrying only a bottle of water with me.
My yearning for adventure and the sweet thrill it brings
when you step outside and await great things
It’s amazing. You feel like you could conquer the world. You can do anything.
Nobody’s going to scoff or ridicule
Or push down that spark you have inside
Your glowing heart, beating with the soft rhythm of gentle, falling rain
and yet so passionate and fierce, ready to lose, waiting to gain.
My costumes! How bright and wonderful!
You could just take off your clothes
run around the park,
and yet No one will mind.
You didn’t have to worry, not a single thing
About a single hair or girls’ monthly gifts
You were carefree and free, that you could
Possibly. Ever. Be.
Oh, but that’s so sad, because nothing
Ever lasts, even if the sweetest of my youth
And the loveliest of my days
Must end.
I realise, oh, the pain!
I wish I could just bring back one more day!
Of blissful moments and wishes
Blown away by the wind.
All those memories, I shall bottle up
in a small treasure box.
I’ll never forget them. I can only cherish and savour
the wonderful memories, but never quite escaping
the reality of growing up, and always ponder
what if…
I could be a child again.
