Children are in such a hurry to grow up
I was
I thought grown-ups could be whoever they wanted
I didn’t realize that pieces of you fall away in the meantime
I wish I was a kid again so I still knew everything
Sometimes, you get lucky
And in someone else you find a part of you
One you didn’t even know slipped away
But instantly you recognize it
Like a childhood memento
So it’s really no wonder
Seeing them, being around them
Makes you feel better
Whole
Words become unnecessary, a look says more
And they can find you when you lose yourself
Bring you back
Ground you
And now that all the pieces are together
The puzzle complete
You’re aware
Nothing can break it apart again

I stalked you again .
Don't ask me why i did that .
It's just that i wanted to know how you were doing .
Because im right here ,
Still not doing very well .
And im sorry for reading every posts ,
And have my own thoughts to it .
Your life is no longer a dedication for me ,
I get that . Alot .
Your smile is not mine anymore ,
I know .
It belong to her now .
And i heard that ,
She's hurting you .
I know im supossed to be happy ,
Because you finally felt what i used to felt .
But i don't ,

Maybe because i love you too much and too deep ,
So much that it's hurting to see you hurted .
It's like the pain is back-stabbing me .

I know i should be laughing or tell my friends ,
Then laught at you .
But i just don't feel like to ,
Maybe because you're too perfect to me.

Undeniably too perfect to be hurted .
Im sorry .
So much , because i couldn't save you from her .

It's not that i didn't try ,
You're the one who gave up .
If you don't , you won't be hurting dear .
Maybe Never .

Im sorry .
I wonder ,
Why do i say sorry so much
For something that i didn't do ?
And for something that you deserve .

It's two am
and the thoughts consume me
the thoughts of you
are pulsing through my head
Just like my heart beats for you

For you, forever
Or at least that's how it's supossed to be.
Clearly things change,
but you're still all I see
your face in my eyes
your touch in my dreams

I'll forever think of you
and what we used to be.


(a.f.c)

My tongue feels like lead.
There is a buzzing in my head.
Th lights are too bright,
It's too late in the night,
I just want to leave,
Can you even believe
that I am on a boat?
I'm not supossed to float!
But now I must sing,
for only I can bring
A calm to the sea
These sailors are looking at me
with a new found clarity.
For I can bring them prosperity
all because of my shimmering tail.
But don't worry for I will prevail.
Because with the shinning of the moon.
I will bring them all their doom.

When you are in space without oxygen.. you will suffocate.
A black void will strangle all your life out of you...
And your eyes will gaze right into the abyss.

A lonely drifting rock, floating in a place where time loses all meaning and hope is nothing but floating dust.

A vortex tears through this bored reality.

A bleeding **** oozes out blackness, the flicker of a blinking eye, ******* me in.

Emotions implode, a rush of rage, fists land where they were not supossed to land.

Meteor impacts on your skull...

Hope splattered on the walls washed away with the tears of grief and regret. Remorse.

But then all gone, all absorbed into the gaping maw inside me.

Complete withdrawal from life... a retreat to hibernate.

That is how our love feels... this is how you feel.

When i am  sleeping you will push a pillow on my face.

You feel like breathing

So easy, i do not even notice you are there anymore yet i need you to live.

You are like breathing

With a plastic bag strapped over my head.

And i am all out of breath......

My eyes gaze backwards into the void...

A floating dying planet, dusted by particles of hope..

There is a boy in my walls you see

He is the boy that's supossed to be me

He craws at the brick he screams and shouts

I can't I cry back

My parents can't find out

They'd beat me

They'd shame me

I'd be in hell

At the same time he tells me

It's the only way I'd feel well