When I was 14 and younger I had my uncle Tom he was not only my uncle he was my bestfriend. I loved him dearly and he loved me. When I would come home from being in Montanna or I would just be comming over he would hug me like I was gone for attornity. He would hug me so tight it felt so good to be held like that and to know I was missed so much by a special man. His hugs were not the only thing his name for me was to I was called moon. When I was born he was the first man to hold me other then my father and from the time I was put in his arms to the time he looked at me and into my eyes I have been his moon. To this day I still dont know why I was his moon but when I would be upset and be crying he would wrap me in his arms and tell me "Dont cry my moon everything is going to be ok" and from those words I would fall asleep in his arms and know everything was going to be ok. Although my uncle died in 2006 he is greatly thought of and missed by his moon. My uncles death was the hardest death for me not only because it was the first in my life but because he was such a special man in my life. For the first year it was hard to think of him gone I would always think I was gone and I would see him soon. It is very hard to finally realize a person that you love and meens so much to u is offically gone forever. A few years go by and you are finally getting the hang of being without  that specail person and finally feel ok about it. You do heal from it just takes a long time and you do move on. My advice is do the things that special someone would want for you and accomplish them. If its a sport dont stop playing because you feel like you are teasing them do it cause you and that special someone loved to do it together. Dont stop something you love to do just because that special someone you did it with isnt there to do it with you. Its not rubbing it in its keeping a good game or activity going that you and that special someone did together. I promise you keep thriving they will be proud because you know what makes them proud.

10.23.11
he caught me at a young age.
swept me off my feet and held me close.
he was
perfection to me.
he was my everything.
who was i without him?
before i could prepare,
heartbreak happened.
in a fury of lies and deception,
i lost my only lover.
my only friend.
insults like weapons
took away the parts of me that
made me feel alive.
250 pills and
one ***** razor blade later,
i was officially ****** up.
and he was offically
my downfall.
two years later we
were healed.
fragile and broken.
but knitting the threads of our past
to find each other again.
the love that was always there
surprised us both.
and terrified me.
the distance made it unbearable.
and he was so dedicated.
while i was so fickle.
how could i love someone
who had caused me so much pain?
i knew if i gave myself to him again,
i would never make it out alive.

then i met you.
and everything changed.
because something about you
is so addicting.
and i cannot stay away.
we dont have history.
we arent in love.
but in time,
i,
we..
could be.
and with you,
i feel right.
this feels right.
i could talk for hours
about nothing with you.
sleep has never
been so easy,
when i know you are
keeping me safe.
and smiling has never
been so natural
as when i look at you.
you give me butterflies
and pick me up so high.
that there is no point
in even looking at the world below.
there is only you.
and that is all i need.

Don't let these ******
out here sell you dreams and feed you lies.
Don't let them tell you deep things,
then only show up with paper-thin actions.
It shouldn't work like that.
Hold ****** accountable.
Don't hand out your soul, make a ***** earn your heart.
I don't care how much money they have.
At the end of the day, if you ain't offically the wife,
then none of the riches is yours anyway.
The only thing you will eventually end up owning is heartache.

Taste remains on lips,
Sweet scent on fingers,
Vivid memories scorched,
Internal desire still lingers.

Hair air blown and tossed,
Cheek lovingly stroked,
Burning pure passion
Vibrant embers now stoked.

Calmness ultimately present
Company offically confirmed
Heart currently divided
Life lesson learnt.