while others dream of
getting an education
finding a job
getting a husband
buying a house
choosing curtains
washing sheets
doing chores
and shopping groceries for the week at the local supermarket
going out with the girls for a night out at some nice pub
having a baby
changing diapers
teaching your kid to talk and read
living the dream
cooking pies for pastry contests
growing old and becoming
a nanny
playing bingo in the local club
and driving a nice car
and not having troublesome teenagers
and dying peacefully
and having a fairly nice funeral
and a nice piece of land in the local cemetery,
I dream of
staying up until 4 a.m.
the only light coming from my
laptop screen
killing characters while pressing
keyboard buttons
drinking wine
and smoking rolled
cigarettes
in a cramped apartment
in some unknown city
a room
stuffed with art
and scattered manuscripts
all over the floor
caffeine nights
and starving my body
but feeding my mind
and freeing my soul
I don't dream of getting married
but of getting my characters together and
then drifting them apart
I don't dream of having children
but of writing children who
grab the opportunity and live
a fascinating life
I don't dream of living
I dream of creating lives
and deaths
and dreams
and love
I don't dream of dying an old lady
I dream of immortalising myself
in creating fictional lives

they told me i could find out
how you feel about me
by the way you kiss me.

you kissed with all your strength
yet at the same time gentle
you kissed with passion and with rage
you kissed me all-consuming.

i could've judged by those
so many kisses
that i meant the world to you
and that you ******* adored me

oh! was i such a fool!
it turns out you could kiss me
like i was everything
and at the same time i meant
**N O T H I N G

You stab me in the back with a knife,
and I apologize for bleeding on it.

The idea of love is so beautiful
but the execution, so dire.

Your eyes are telling a tale
Everywhere you go

Your steps are making rhythms
silent and slow

Your head was never high
Nor does your voice

Every tremble of your hands
Every quiver on your lips
I know.

i wanna take the pain of yesterday
and all the pain of your tomorrow
i wanna make your fears go away
i wanna steal away your sorrow

i wanna wipe your tears away
and heal your scars forever
i wanna hold you day by day
and be with you whenever

you need my helping hand
to wrap myself around you
and never let the idyll end

you're my vanilla
you're my caffeine
you're my sweet fragrance
you're all i need

you taste like chocolate
you feel like silk
you're like cashmere
pressed to my skin

you're cream and sugar
you're pepper and salt
you are my sweetness
you are my boat

you are my books
and you are the films
i watch at midnight
you're under my skin
you are my light
and you're all i need

give me wings.
set me free.
i want to travel
to every edge of the world.
i want to sleep
on park benches.
i want to eat foreign
cuisine
and drink cheap
coffee, half asleep,
in a booth in a
cheap restaurant by
the road.
i want to walk barefoot
through fields of daisies;
i want to bury my toes
in the sand and feel the
wind in my hair
on a beach in October.
i want to breathe the
salty air in
and write poetry on
the cliffs.
i want to recite
cummings under the stars
while drinking cheap whisky
i want to run free
through fields of grass,
those green oceans of
morning dew.
i want to drive on
the highway at full
speed
and ***** the
speed limit.
i want to sing off-key
at the top of my lungs,
i want to hide in the
woods and make my
own recipes,
i want to cook
my own life
not by the rule book.
i want to be whom i've
always wanted to be.
don't tell me how
to live my life;
let me drink hot
chocolate,
sitting on a beach
at 4 a.m. in a
party dress;
let me drink
tequila in baby blue
cotton pyjamas,
let me waltz
to heavy metal,
let me breathe.
for ****'s sake
break my shackles.

you're not your hair:
you can cut it dye it curl it straighten it shave it bend it twist it;

you're not your face:
you can hide it under layers of make-up you can put on lenses you can change your face in a matter of minutes;

you're not your skin:
you can cut it draw on it bite it tear it;

you're not your body:
you can lose weight gain weight;

you're not your clothes:
strip them off;

never reduce
yourself
to
a colour
a number
an adjective
a noun

never reduce
yourself
to a simple
word

you are
the thoughts you have at 3 a.m.
the lame jokes you tell your friends
the art you create
the books you read
the pages you have dog-eared
the quotes you have highlighted
the coffee you never finished drinking
the movie you watch after midnight, wrapped in a blanket
the chocolate cake you ate that night with that girl
the slice of pizza you could've eaten but you gave to your best friend
the kiss that still burns on your lips
the cigarettes that sting in your lungs long after you smoked them
the dreams you dream
the worlds you build in your mind
the song that's stuck in your head
the moments you're in the shower
the iloveyous
the ikindaguessilikeyous
the icareforyous
the seeyoulaters
the words you say
the smiles you smile
the laughs you laugh
the loves you love
the hates you hate

you are
an entire universe:
you're stars
and planets
and galaxies
and asteroids
and comets

you are a cosmos
trapped in
a shell.

you are
a gazillion worlds
locked in
a human cage.

never think
of yourself
as of
anything
less.

I have no limbs.
I have no organs.
I’m not tissues  
and cells.
I’m not atoms
held together by an
unknown force.
I am emptiness.
I’m nothing.
An explosion of pain.
I can feel my skin
peeling off;
I am falling apart.
Today, I’m an exception
from the biology book.
Today, I am a shrapnel
in a futile war.