Actually scratch that.
I miss the things we planned to do,
The drives
The lunch dates
The lazy mornings watching movies
And how our just woken up tongues would taste.
I miss the memories I hoped to have,
But I guess you didn't think the same
I'm not quite sure what I said,
Why it all turned out this way
Or what caused you to leave me sitting alone in that park.
Maybe it was the alcohol,
Or maybe you were afraid of what might happen.
Either way.
When I looked down at you
That one lazy morning,
Right before you gave up on me,
I wanted you
With all my heart
But in your eyes I saw how apprehensive you were.
I saw the barbed wire around your tongue
And the metal fences behind your eyes I'm not strong enough to climb.
It doesn't help you kept building it higher.
So to make it simple.
When people ask me what's wrong
Because they see the bags you left under my eyes
Or the flesh you took that used to pad my ribs.
I remember how I came home smelling like you
Because we hadn't stopped touching each other for hours.
And I'll tell them,
I had a few late nights
Waiting for a friend to get home
So I knew they were safe.
If we are being honest
I know you will come home,
But I am not your home.
I tried,
I would have done close to anything to be
But I was too weak to climb your fenses
And I cut myself too many times on your sharp edges
If you hadn't left I would have let myself be cut to ribbons.