A little after two A.M.
This morning forty-nine names were read--
The names of forty-nine victims who
Now are sleeping among the dead.

They lost their lives a year ago
When a gunman, ISIS-inspired,
Sneaked his weapon into a nightclub,
Held it up, and open-fired.

Those who survived the horrible shooting
At the gay club where the crime took place
Will constantly relive that nightmare.
It's hardly something that time can erase.

Fifty-three patrons were wounded that night,
Many of whom still are reeling
From the horror, and they still require
Physical and mental healing.

Think of the families and friends of the victims.
Think of the magnitude of their loss.
How do you measure the sadness when
Extremists and innocent lives crisscross?

People from all over the world
Were appalled by the killer's barbarity
And sent kind words of sympathy
As they joined together in solidarity.

However, from under a dark veil
Of hatred and hypocrisy,
Emerged some voices of hatred from those
Hell-bent on a theocracy.

Voices of fanaticism,
No matter the source, always destroy
The goodness that is meant to be
And stifle liberty and joy.

Today in Orlando and in other cities,
Forty-nine times the church bells will sound.
May we remember the innocent victims
And let love and compassion abound.

- by Bob B (6-12-17)

Oh bathing in the water
Cleansing my skin
Trying to wash away
All of my sins
Trying to bring
The best I have back out
Time to burn this heart to the core
I've got love want to release it all

Got a little feeling
Got a little spark
Yeah this fire
I want to light it up
Needed that feeling
To take hold
Needed this feeling
So I can bring it all

Purify me
Wash all this negativity
Away from me
I wanna feel that light
Shining brightly
Purify me
I wanna feel that
Warmth inside me
Purify me
Purify me

Time to shake
My world up
Time to change
This whole landscape
Positivity gotta let it
Shine in, shine so brightly
Come on these demons
They've taken enough from me
Time to believe
We can do better things
No more drowning
I need to breathe freely
From the mountain top
This time, I'll take the time
To enjoy the view
I'm changing me
Are you gonna change you, ooh

Got a little feeling
Got a little spark
Yeah this fire
I want to light it up
Needed that feeling
To take hold
Needed this feeling
So I can bring it all

Purify me
Wash all this negativity
Away from me
I wanna feel that light
Shining brightly
Purify me
I wanna feel that
Warmth inside me
Purify me
Purify me

Kicking these demons
Back to the kerb
Wash them away
back to the sea
I won't disappear
Got a smile on my face
Clearing up my soul
All this darkness inside
Can fill up with light
Let the sun shine
Heat this cold heart up
It's time to make a pact
Yeah time to restart

Got a little feeling
Got a little spark
Yeah this fire
I want to light it up
Needed that feeling
To take hold
Needed this feeling
So I can bring it all

Purify me
Wash all this negativity
Away from me
I wanna feel that light
Shining brightly
Purify me
I wanna feel that
Warmth inside me
Purify me
Purify me

Rewriting this story
From the start
It all begins here
Past memories
Only hanging on to the good
Letting go of the bad
Learnt from mistakes
That made me angry or sad
Time to let go, time to look forward
Leave all those mistakes
That I've made
Cleanse it away
Yeah cleanse it away

Got a little feeling
Got a little spark
Yeah this fire
I want to light it up
Needed that feeling
To take hold
Needed this feeling
So I can bring it all

Purify me
Wash all this negativity
Away from me
I wanna feel that light
Shining brightly
Purify me
I wanna feel that
Warmth inside me
Purify me
Purify me

©2017 Written By Benji James

There's a storm raging
Inside of my stomach
The weight in my mind
Is getting too heavy to hold
I can't seem to focus enough
There are voices in my head
Scheming, Planning where this should end
The life I live has turned upside down
And nobody's around to pull me out
Nobody's around to save me from myself
Oh dear god I don't want your help

In your eyes
I can see how much you couldn't careless
In your eyes
Your Independence shines again
Tell me what do you see in mine?
Can you see all the tears I've cried?
Tell me what do you see in my eyes
Can you see the pain that burns deep inside
In your eyes
I can see the water washing away your soul
Tell me what do you see in mine?

How's it make you feel?
To know your the one
Who brought out the monster in me
What's your explanation?
For bringing forward all these demons
How's it make you feel
To know your the one
Who has brought me to this
Oh, baby, I'm a monster
Lurking in the darkness of the night
Oh, baby, I'm a monster
Watch your step before my teeth sink in
You are the one who conjured all of it.

Can you feel the hurt
Taking control of your body
When you know you lose
The one who means the most to you
And somethings missing
In the darkness of the night
Oh dear lord where is my light
Something doesn't feel right
Something in your stomach turns
The memories you left yearn
And you thought you could learn
From all the mistakes you made
But it was worth every risk you'd take
Because it was her who made you smile
It was her who made you laugh
She was the one who saw you cry
And I wasn't man enough to admit you were right
I wasn't man enough to see that you saw inside of me
Why'd we go and say goodbye
Why'd we go and burn the photographs
Now my mind knows things won't go back to the way they were
But there was nobody else I loved more than her

In your eyes
I can see how much you couldn't careless
In your eyes
Your Independence shines again
Tell me what do you see in mine?
Can you see all the tears I've cried?
Tell me what do you see in my eyes
Can you see the pain that burns deep inside
In your eyes
I can see the water washing away your soul
Tell me what do you see in mine?

How's it make you feel?
To know your the one
Who brought out the monster in me
What's your explanation?
For bringing forward all these demons
How's it make you feel
To know your the one
Who has brought me to this
Oh, baby, I'm a monster
Lurking in the darkness of the night
Oh, baby, I'm a monster
Watch your step before my teeth sink in
You are the one who conjured all of it.

I'm the creation of your own making
What goes wrong falls onto you shoulders
But it's not just you who's to blame
I'm the stupid one for falling for your game
And if you thought this was ugly
You haven't experienced the worst
It's coming swiftly and quick
There's nothing stopping this
Like a wave crashing upon the beach
There is no stopping this
He's gonna lose himself in the darkness of the night
There are no stars lighting up his skies
Just a sensation of revenge burning inside
There's no soul left to save
But I can see into your eyes
What do you see in mine?

In your eyes
I can see how much you couldn't careless
In your eyes
Your Independence shines again
Tell me what do you see in mine?
Can you see all the tears I've cried?
Tell me what do you see in my eyes
Can you see the pain that burns deep inside
In your eyes
I can see the water washing away your soul
Tell me what do you see in mine?

How's it make you feel?
To know your the one
Who brought out the monster in me
What's your explanation?
For bringing forward all these demons
Hows it make you feel
To know your the one
Who has brought me to this
Oh, baby, I'm a monster
Lurking in the darkness of the night
Oh, baby, I'm a monster
Watch your step before my teeth sink in
You are the one who conjured all of it.

©2017 Written By Benji James

I miss the way
You used to sit
On your front lawn
Waiting for me to see you
So that I'd come and talk to you
You were too shy to knock on the door
But your secrets you told me them all
And I miss all the ways
you and I couldn't take our eyes off each other
You had all my attention
I miss that emotional expression

Tell me what happened to us
How did it turn out I wasn't good enough
I think about you every day
Tell do you even think about me?
And every time you were with another guy
The jealousy kicked in
But I couldn't let it show
I just wanted you to be happy

Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
Baby, you don't know
What you mean to me
Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
You're everything I see
You're everything I need
Hey, hey baby
Why don't you want me?

We haven't talked in so long
And I tried to forget
What you meant to me
But it seems every time I forget
Dreams remind me
Just what you mean to me
I don't know how to let you go
I don't know how to show you this love
When you're with someone
And all I want to do
Is hold you close beneath
These stars
Your hands fit perfectly in mine
Yeah, baby, you're always
Running on my mind

Tell me what happened to us
How did it turn out I wasn't good enough
I think about you every day
Tell do you even think about me?
And every time you were with another guy
The jealousy kicked in
But I couldn't let it show
I just wanted you to be happy

Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
Baby, you don't know
What you mean to me
Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
You're everything I see
You're everything I need
Hey, hey baby
Why don't you want me?

Oh honey memories ignite
In my head
while I'm laying in bed
I remember back to conversations that we had
I remember back to every smile every laugh
That we had
I remember every tear that you cried
And every time I had you wrapped in my arms
But there was once where I held you
But you wouldn't hug back
That's when everything
Started to go wrong
And I felt I was losing you more every day
Until I completely lost you one day
I don't wanna relive that again

Tell me what happened to us
How did it turn out I wasn't good enough
I think about you every day
Tell do you even think about me?
And every time you were with another guy
The jealousy kicked in
But I couldn't let it show
I just wanted you to be happy

Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
Baby, you don't know
What you mean to me
Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
You're everything I see
You're everything I need
Hey, hey  baby
Why don't you want me?

I'm missing you
And how we used to think the other people we'd seen
You didn't think any other girl was good enough for me
And I still don't think any guy is good enough for you
It should have been me who ended up with you
Instead, I guess I lost out
So I have to reminisce in memories you left me with
And I'll just have to deal with it
Just know there is nothing I wouldn't do for you
I'm always gonna be here when you call
I'll be there if you ever need help
getting back up after a fall

Tell me what happened to us
How did it turn out I wasn't good enough
I think about you every day
Tell do you even think about me?
And every time you were with another guy
The jealousy kicked in
But I couldn't let it show
I just wanted you to be happy

Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
Baby, you don't know
What you mean to me
Tell me Baby, baby
Why don't you want me?
You're everything I see
You're everything I need
Hey, hey baby
Why don't you want me?

©2017 Written By Benji James