Stare at the clouds all day
Watch the shifting shapes
Dance, roll, and fade
Sit there all day
Awe-struck and inspired
But you can't be the clouds
When you are there

Looking away

All day

Here I stand at the top of this hill
Which I once thought was high.
It is nothing but a burial mound
For every instance of my life.
At least I know it will only grow
But it builds me up with
Disturbances and time.
When I lie down
On the treacherous ground,
Whispers grow louder
Louder and louder in my head
Chiding this growing man
Until he goes mad
Until he goes tumbling down
Away from the sounds
Which only grow louder
Louder and louder

I do not know where I am
I do not recognize this place

This mind
What I thought was so well seasoned
Ready for great things
Now blackened charcoal
And somehow forgotten
Along with the ability to keep up

Please
Slow the **** down, man
I
Think
I'm

Lost.

How can I not dream big
In this lackluster life of mine?
Overwhelming fear forces my hand
To play against any notion that this is it.
An artist, a writer,
A musician, a scientist
I'll take anything to get me out
Away from this life that is so called Mine.
To finally get the chance at an exhale
And have it not be my dying breath
I have to do something
Why must dreams only exist in my sleep?
I have to wake up.
I have to live.

I'm sad
I'm hungry
It's hard to breathe

How do I sleep at night?
When you're losing this fight
Choking on candid emotions
That I can't even eat
Look at me, I'm thinning
Sure you are too
Sure it's a symbol
Of what's going to happen to you
I can't even fathom
You not being here
No more of this chasm
That you've fallen into
I'm sure if you die
I will too.

10th July 2017

To My Husband

As I watch your life, slipping away
We share all the things we want to say

We have time to reflect, encourage and love
To be grateful with warmth, to look beyond and above

We remember the good and laugh at the bad
And take time to listen and embrace the sad

It is a rich time, this time that we have
What has been, what is now, is what will be had

As your strength fades, and your eyes slowly dim
We look beyond the body you are in

When death approaches and your final breath taken
We know your spirit, will soar with elation

You will look at this world and say your goodbyes
And peace will take you as you pass through the sky’s

All the best for your journey
Your loving wife