Tatiana

Tatiana Jun 2019

................................................................................................
If there is somebody listening, please let me know,
so I can shield my thoughts so you don't get lost.
It's a twisting, weaving, nightmarish maze in my head.
Don't listen so closely, you won't like what is said.

If I drive into this pole I would-
DIE yeah I know that brain thanks for-
PLAYING with his heart! She's playing-
GAMES which game? What do-
YOU want to know? How much wood-
WOULD anyone care if I jumped off a cliff-
RATHER than learning how to fly, I just-
AVOID the treacherous oceans of my-
MIND the gap, mind the gap, mind-
THE best of times, it was the worst of-
TIMES, divide, subtract-
ADD a face to a name and see its-
LIES that stab me like swords and I-
CRY from happiness, the world is okay.

If there is somebody listening, please let me know,
so I can shield my thoughts so you don't get lost.
It's a twisting, weaving, nightmarish maze in my head.
Don't listen so closely, you won't like what is said.
................................................................................................

©Tatiana
Sometimes one word can trigger a newish thought which just leads to a bizarre continuation of the previous thought.
Die playing games you would rather avoid. Mind the times. Add lies. Cry.

#frantic #thoughts

Tatiana May 2019

Not My Cup of Tea

-------------------------------------------------------
                 I
                    feel
                        so
                         woozy
                            uneasy
                            my mind
                        is feeling
                   queasy
                 and
                   nothing
                       that I do
                           seems to
                      make this
                    go away
       not even just a cup of tea
   can keep these dreadful shivers
  at bay and I am left wondering if I will
  ever feel okay. Am I going to         turn
    out to be something great? Or will I
          stumble into oblivion
and no one will remember my name.

-------------------------------------------------------

©Tatiana
I guess I'm going to have to make another cup of tea and see if I like that one.

#not #my #cup #of #tea #uneasy #unsure #uncertain

Tatiana May 2019

I don't know

I don't think I know everything.
In fact, I know I don't
but I wish I knew what I know now,
and I wish I could know what I don't know,
but I don't know what I don't know,
and that's frustrating.

©Tatiana
I don't know

#i #dont #know

Tatiana May 2019

Have You?

Have you ever had to fight the urge
to get in your car and drive
away from the cold,
from hands so old
that grip you tight,
hold you to the light
and mock you for being
unable to reach it?

©Tatiana
Because getting behind the wheel when you're having a mental breakdown is a terrible decision.

#depression #drive #fear #run #away

Tatiana May 2019

Trying to Reach the End

When you turn the last page and see my face
do you find that you now hate
the story I wrote?
The part that you played?
The time you had wasted?
When you were trying to reach the end.

©Tatiana

#trying #to #reach #the #end

Tatiana May 2019

I'm Not in Your Atmosphere

I know i'm not in your
a t m o s p h e r e
and I fear
that our connection
won't be
v e r y  c l e a r

The words I speak will be
muffled with s t a t i c
I'll wait for you in the a t t i c
with
my
t e l e s c o p e

I know
I know
I  k n o w

I won't see you in f o r e v e r

I hope
I hope
I  h o p e

You'll be a star that does more than
g l i m m e r

But my vision is growing
d i m m e r

And the chances are growing
s l i m m e r

As the stars
f a l l
.
.
.

©Tatiana
Here's more of the Saturn song that I posted which people seemed to like. Which beckons the question, do you want to hear the song? I have no issues posting it to youtube. I might do that even if no one responds.

#saturn #atmosphere