one day you'll look back on your life
and realize
you were born a caterpillar
and grew into a butterfly
in the midst of absurdity.
you'll look down
and see everything beneath you
because you'll be flying,
with wings you didn't even know you had.
growing up is a process that happens over time,
and even though it feels as if it takes an eternity,
you don't always see her there when she arrives.
i think humans are just butterflies
that have more emotions.
we are stronger than we look,
but our wings should not be touched.
for the oils on your hands will weigh us down.

When I began to cry; the sky did too
Cotton candy clouds dripping blue in June

as depression left
anxiety moved in

its almost as if my brain
is renting itself out to various diseases

one is evicted
another pays its way in

We are what we are
I am what I am

Nothing but a replica
Of imagined will
For all this effort
Scrapes don't fade
On porcelain skin

i ain't got time for their *******

A new phone does not need to mean the latest model.
After the last firmware update meant to throttle your
speed.
I still have a Samsung Galaxy
S7, and no, not the ones that explode.
Those were the Note.
Mine is fine and every single day five PM sharp,
another update readies itself to start and download.
But I say, "No."
And push it off another twenty-four.
It's become my own version of an alarm.
A reminder that putting off what you don't want to do
is fine, too.
Fear of missing out?
**** that, my life is in my hands.
Which shake as they screen calls from numbers I don't recognize.

As well as any other anxiety.
Keeping pace with the Joneses doesn't interest me.
If it were organic, the push to upgrade and not be obsolete,
then maybe
I could find myself worrying about sending out faster tweets.
But life lived parallel to somebody speeding through on tracks.
Makes the living-now too blurry in a time when looking back
is called depression.