a man you could miss for two days straight,
wouldn’t miss you for a year

the jacket you left here still smells like cigarettes,
yet i'm wearing it because it makes me feel like i'm not alone

i'm waiting for us to fade to dust.
the both of us.
because this love cannot last forever.

I know how you like your coffee,
I know who you see,
I know what you order from me,

I hand out the paperwork and email the documents,
this isn't my first job,
I am confident in myself,

I know the names of your clients,
friends,
and your missus.

But I'm the mistress, the secret
secretariat

I see you're getting old, sitting there,
With youthful eyes, but graying hair;
But I recall the splash of tresses
Blending with the golden sands.
The time shows in your hands;
You don't hide the blemishes
That youthful pride concerned you with;
The thin lines of loosening skin
Are not what keep you in.
But I recall your winter porcelain,
And summer lines of worship;
Cherokee cheeks and Burmese neck,
Sun-dappled tops and blue jean dress,
The tennis smash and victory dance,
The on and off of our romance.
And in your memory, locked away,
You dance and sing and nurse your babies,
As if it were today.

I'm filled up w so much pain, everyday I'm driving myself insane, to you it's all a game but I never wanted to play, I just got ****** up in ways that i can't explain, days pass by and I wish I wasn't alive, I don't blame you my regret nights always start w I, I try to stop myself and try to be happy, try to locate a part of me that doesn't rely on you but it never happens, I need you by my side and I can't find the reason why I guess I'm just a sucker to when I was inlove, this feeling used to be awesome but now it all just *****, good luck to the next fool that falls, I hope they find the true one that won't break their heart, you like to make me jealous and play me like a doll bc you know for a fact I'm not strong enough to move on, you use that against me knowing I'll come back, if only I knew then what I know now man I would take it all back, I would've never met your ***, always down to the point where there's no return and when I thought you could change, I was a fool when will I ever learn? Learn this one fact though, here take a lesson this ones personal, don't let people walk all over you, stand up for yourself don't depend your happiness on someone bc they'll leave and you'll have nothing. Baby where'd you go? This isn't the girl I fell inlove w or we're you playing me since the first day we met. ****.

I don't want to talk, and I don't want to speak, Everything you have say,  well you could let that be, I'm not blind to see, where this will lead, to save to myself from further pain i have to leave, but before I go, we'll you should know,

I will always loveeee you.