I have masks for every feeling

They often save me from reeling

.

I must have done some wrong

Don’t know for how long i could be strong

I thought I cherished all I had

But I realise now that it was my bad

I was holding maybe too tight

Strangling, what I cared, with no respite

I have learned to pull back now

Hiding, what I used to share, anyhow

Now, I have masks for every feeling

They often save me fron reeling

.

I am lying here, crying under the moonlight

The lost moments find it easy to alight

I wish the sleep would come

the endless thoughts make me numb

What if I had done it differently

I might not have run into regret incidentally

I am counting the mistakes I made somehow

Maybe I am not guilty but they hurt anyhow

So, I have masks for every feeling

They often save me from reeling

.

I am not hiding under the plain sight

Still sometimes, I make the mistake, in spite

It’s a mistake to show your all

Nobody gives a **** in long haul

So I have started using these masks

Which makes hiding a less daunting task

I am now unlike the old me

Who used to let her feelings run free

That’s why, I have masks for every feeling

They often save me from reeling

.

I am lying here, hiding under the moonlight

Burying the moments that wish to alight

Sometimes the old me, still runs wild

Crumbling the walls I so carefully compiled

I often let her do as she wishes

then see her tumble down into pieces

I have seen her hope crush a million times

falling down after a hopeful climb

It’s the reason, I have masks for every feeling

They often save me from reeling

.

this armor i wear
strong and solid
heavy and rusted
shielded me from
arrows of suffering
but i grow tired
carrying this weight
to continue on
the path of life
i must shed
my battle-worn armor
and be free once more

She might be beautiful
On the outside

Hair, makeup, false smiles
Perfectly applied

She reflects warmth
Taking credit for stolen heat

She claims to protect
But she welcomes their defeat

A symbol of humanity
Though she possesses none

Propping up evil incarnate
Isn't a job for just anyone

NCL August 2019

akhila
queen of masks!
each veil worn
to germanic perfection
they’ve become you,
hiding that true deity
lurking deep within

each motley camouflage
a charade to quell
a rising dam
of kaleidoscopic emotions
bubbling from regrettable actions
of lives past

this towering fortress
surrounding your jello heart
self built, brick by brick
and coated with
the leaded paint of distrust,
is now impenetrable

akhila
sporting a thousand faces!
lose that stealthy visor of denial,
and true to your name
open your white silk kimono
at once
to let the tides in
and watch that inner pink lotus coruscate

who am i?

the beleaguered king
tired of wearing a million cloaks
and desperately looking
to lose them all
in order to find
my true goddess akhila

© 2019