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Patrick Austin Mar 2021
To Whom it may concern,

I am unable to locate or purchase Dijonnaise at any local store in my area. This has been an issue since the beginning of 2021. Is this product being discontinued? Amazon and other online retailers offer highly marked up versions of this product but this East Coast/West Coast, Hellmann's/Bestfoods branding has always been off-putting to me, especially in this day and age plus I despise supporting Amazon or similar box stores/corporations. I would also be more likely to purchase Dijonnaise if it came in a glass container. Plastic is not what millennials want and it no longer "makes it possible" as the ads of yesteryear have stated. I use Dijonnaise very often, I am highly disappointed with the small and awkwardly shaped plastic containers, plastic squeeze bottles make it very difficult to expel or retrieve the entirety of the product. I am strongly considering switching to Durkee's brand mustard in the future as they have always used glass containers, I would mix it with Trader Joe's mayonnaise since it is the only one I can find in a glass container. I understand that the added weight of glass cuts into your profits when distributing your products but I have not seen an advertisement for Dijonnaise in years, where are all these profits being spent? The main reason I purchase Dijonnaise is for the nostalgia of the television ads I grew up watching containing a parody of the song "Duke of Earl". I would strongly recommend re-running these retro advertisements on YouTube ad services in the future if you want to keep this product in production. I feel there is no need to attempt re-creating these ads either, it would be a waste of resources and a disappointment to those who grew up with the original versions. I work in marketing and people are voting with their dollars nowadays, your structure and model could benefit from some evaluation. Please tell me how to buy your product locally and take note that myself and many others prefer plastic free packaging. Thanks for your time. Please do not sell my information or use it to contact me for anything not mentioned above.
Sincerely

...

The response I received was that the product has been discontinued. I was offered a coupon for a complimentary 8oz jar of Mayonnaise as it's the only product still available in a glass container. Unfortunately this is only sold on the opposite side of the Rocky Mountains from my location and only at limited locations. How dissatisfying...
This is a sad tale of the American dream gone awry.
Peter Farsje Feb 2020
March! March! March!
Marketing's pounding drum.

Beat! Beat! Beat!
Hear the thundering feet.

Come one, Come all!
Answer the piper's call.

Act fast! Act fast!
The sale will not last!

Need, Need, Need!
You will not be freed.

Credit, Credit, Credit!
As long as you can get it.

Spend, Spend, Spend!
Will it never end?

Pawn, Pawns, Pawns,

The illusion We are in control.
S Bharat Apr 2019
The Condition

I liked when I partly heard
They had the vacancy
Reserved especially for a girl.

They didn't want very educated
But the beautiful one.
And my head was in a whirl.

S. Bharat
All of my targeted ads remember
that we wanted to go to Iceland
in winter
to see the Aurora Borealis,

and they bombard me relentlessly
as if marketing in memories.

This instance is not unique.

It seems
no matter how many buttons I push
in attempts to subdue
these bright incursions,

I can't mute you completely.
Middle Class Sep 2018
Drank the morning rain and felt it in my chest
Clung, suspended with the fog on my vanity
I have a pencil to my temple,the graphite looks impressed

It sees the twitch in my neck, before you ever spoke with breath like turpentine
All in all the days are just one big joke
-I should be the chummy punchline
Maria Etre Jul 2018
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