Fingers of fire
Flaming desire
Flirting with strings
Melted angel wings
Acoustic profanity
Electric insanity
Liquid bricks in your heart
Tearing you apart
A nuclear star
Now that is the sound of a proper guitar!

'First ray of light I saw with my eyes
Face seemed to me the world in size,
Called her Maa when, I don’t know!
Was ready to me, the world to show...

'I don’t remember the tears of pain
Tearful eyes while a child to gain,
Joy rolled down from head to toe!
Was ready to me, the world to show...

'Kept me safe from even a scratch
None must find forever a match,
I call her Maa, I will always call so!
Was ready to me, the world to show...

'Mistakes I have done so many more
You have led me but the right door,
Helped me find the right place to go
Was ready to me, the world to show...

'In my darkest hours to live
You have always hands to give,
You have always Yes, never No...!
Are ready to me, the world to show...

'I am heavenly blessed getting you
As my soul guide always new,
You have much to teach me though...!
Are ready to me, the world to show...

'Hard is the time and long is the way
I am blessed having you still today,
I admit so clearly to you, I owe...!  
Are ready to me, the world to show...

"Manic depression..." you sing and I can't bear the idea of you not being happy. I would give my life for you to keep smiling and one day I hope you can realize how much I think I loved you. You made me want to be a better person and I'll happily commit myself to a God if you told me there was something in it I haven't seen. But I know you wouldn't, I know you would look forward to me making my own decisions. That's what makes you lovely. You would support me and my idiotic ideas, saying we could conquer the world after breakfast. "I know what I want, but i just don't know..." I could climb the highest mountain if you told me you would still be here when I came down. Thank you so much, thank you for understanding my ****** train of thought. "Manic depression is catching my soul..."
If one day you can realize all the light you gave to my world, I hope you could let me know regardless whether I was in heaven or hell.

I need castles made of sand
instead of men made of snow,
eventually we'll fall into the sea
and bath in sun induced slumber
among our kingdom in the sand.

Jimi Hendrix was your favorite band,
So I wanted to be able to connect with you.
I obsessed my time to understand,
The same knowledge of him you knew.

Every time i listened to Hendrix
I tried to think the thoughts you thought;
An attempt to connect with your senses
With the same joy to you he brought.

He always kept his guitar on rhythm
Like a heart beat's pulse.
Is it this that gave you peace within,
To make the problems seem false?

But you were overtaken by temptation
Before I could get to know you better.
Death disguised through a drug's sensation.
Now i listen to Hendrix like you wrote me a letter.

I hear the life that was exposed
Through the plucking of his string
When he produced what he composed,
When sang what he would sing.

I close my eyes and picture you, dad;
What you would look like.
The rare moment you'd be glad,
When your elation would take flight.

I love Hendrix because i love you, dad;
And i wish you could know that.
I don't judge you for going mad,
I just listen to Hendrix because you'd love that.
                                                           ­                           
                                     ­         And read your letter.

Time, I found you, sky was clear blue…
Lake-fish plays, sunny summer days,
Flowers of Spring, brown guitar string
Ease our hearts, playing own parts…

Lonely wooden bench, narrow little trench
Save us for sure from being so impure,
All the way down, white long gown
Makes you my bride, tomato sun dried…

Micro-oven hot, tequila double shot
Nothing else matters, whoever scatters,
Only you & me, floating on the sea
Watching our sky, ready to full-fly…

So many days, we’ll remain always
Both of us care with faithful share
Wish to be there, lowest depth layer
Seems flatland, the life we planned…
 
You are my girl, precious hidden pearl
Love you always; bird in the cage
If you ever feel, stay there until,
Ever free you are, to fly forever …

But be ever sure, what you endure
Goes truly wrong or misread song!
Betrayer is better than wrong mind setter,
Love’s always new, can avail only few!…

Wish you my dear, nothing to fear
You’ll find me, in middle of the sea,
In troubled rainy day, I must say
I’m here with you, a friend so true…

Look up the sky, white clouds dry
Amid the Blue, only me & you
Will remain forever, ever & ever
I’ll love you, Honey days are still sunny… 

 
~ Anwar Parvez Shishir ~

Dhaka Bangladesh
15/JUNE/2014/Sunday

She walked. While I shuffled my feet and stared at the ground.
Lights. Dancing around her in neon moonlit sound.
Grey rainclouds, they hummed a mournful tune
But I kept walking, and I tried to make a little room.
She turned, and the sun crept out and gave a little grin.
He smiled, awed at the sight in front of him but,
I mustered up, and sent her a slight return
And with a wave, she kissed away my concern-
Now we're walking. I can't speak a word.
The shy duck with the beautiful red bird,
We flew off; And soared high in the sky-
The sun had set, slightly reflected while I'm...
Bold as Love.
We're all... Bold as Love.
And I'm Bold as Love.
Just ask the Axis.

I strive for any sense of sanity my body has left
and you could inject lithium into my bloodstream
all you wanted but that will never take away
the stream of conscious to which I face every **** day.
And I speak these words in a volume only sincere ears
could hone into and leech off of for their own sanity,
but things are never that easy.
Affirmation is like a drug and sanity like a ghost
you get addicted to those things in which
we are not usually accustomed to
that sincerity so comforting it's hard to let go.
Most people do drugs to forget,
but ******* with you,
I want to remember every single moment-
harness it inside my memory and save it as draft
so I can post it to my retinas later that night
when I'm loosing sleep because I cannot rid of the ghosts
I've spent both my night and day fighting off.

I want to crash and burn
I want to live a life like all the crazy poets
and authors and writers that never held dear to their sanity
they embraced their madness and embarked on a journey
throwing away any sense of normalcy they had.

But maybe, I should do as you say
or do as my father says-
ya know,  just deal with my problems on my own.
It's kind of crazy because you both say the same thing
which leads me to believe that women do end up
marrying their fathers which I fear-
more than any other obstacle in my life
because my broken wings were built upon my fathers shoulders
and upon mine is more weight than I can carry,
So i'm sorry you've become a muse for my misplaced sanity
and a drawing board for my dilemmas
but baby, you have not seen dramatic.
Not from me at least and it's not safe for me
to hide this part of myself away from you..
But it's like you want me to.
And one day, oh god one day
I will crack under the pressure placed upon these shoulders
and try to fly with these broken wings
and I will crash and burn like alll those people
and it's then I will realize
that hiding away this part of myself
in spite of everything I know,
will be the best and the worst thing I've ever done.

and I'm so ******* tired,
that tired isn't even the word to describe it,
more like futile or unavailing because
I hide away parts of myself for the ones I love
and they itch to come at the surface like a growing tick
ready to explode distracted by euphoria filling it's stomach.
I am not okay, and I'm kind of tired of acting like it.
I am a ticking time bomb
ready to blow your ******* head off at any second
one you will never be able to disable-
and this, this is manic depression.
I wish it was as beautiful as Hendrix made it seem.