Shooting stars shine bright
while they fly through the cosmos
ascending to the highest heights

But all that goes up goes down
And the highest pay the biggest price
For as they once had glory, and world-wide renown
Now they have only fragments of the perfect life

Crashing down forgotten,
spiralling away
Our bodies with sickness rotten
our minds withering with decay

There is bit one thing that can save us
One thing between us and the noose and rope
The brightest shining star of all:

☆Hope☆

i wish you'd write back to me 7.19.25 5:39 pm /17:39
oh, -------,
sometimes i wish you would write a letter back to me.

sometimes i wish you would log onto your old macbook
instinctively go to hellopoetry.com
type in my ariana grande username
find me and my words
find it, these lost sentences,
these trembling letters
i've been trying to send you.

i see why you don't-
the fear that maybe,
one day,
we will wake up and realize we don't love each other
that we don't know each other like we think
we do.

i haven't sent you a letter
because i don't want you to know but i want you to know
that i love you
but what if, what if, what if
one day i don't?

the uncertainty of being not torn apart
but drifting
finding someone new and
figuring out ourselves, finally,
finding that we don't need each other anymore.

of course that's not why you love me
or why i love you

i get that
i get that fear.

but you are not afraid
because you don't even know
that this whole time

i have been screaming
your name.

why? 7.17.25 (6:02 pm / 18:02)
why couldn't i tell what that feeling was?
why, when it should have been really ******* obvious?

why, when i could have saved myself so many tears
and sleepless nights
and blood and thoughts and making my home in a dark corner
telling myself i always wasn't enough

too much ugly unloved
unwanted an outsider
never understood or maybe understood too much
i told myself no one ever cared

why

why?
it's because i was happy
and i thought i didn't deserve it

and now i've thrown away that chance

[playing: fearless by taylor swift]

for you 7.7.25 (8:02 pm / 20:02)
i don't want to stay here

though i could
right?












but if you said

"for me?"


















of course i would.

7.6.25 (10:42 am / 10:42)
ariane.
all those lunches throughout the school year,
do you remember?
not just the two of us,
but somehow that still.

like the day of the dance-
i let you borrow my floral vintage dress,
and we all tried it on at our lunch table.

when i think of you,
i think of the way you twirled
and how the skirts flew in the air
and oh
how you laughed

at the dance we all posed for photos
looking at the camera
our mouths lip-gossed and pouting.
but my eyes always strayed back to you
and in one polaroid,
i’m smiling.

this is what i’ve been trying to tell you.

** m

every possibility 5.19.25 (7:55 pm)
if i told you i loved you
what would you do

would you scream at me
how could i ruin this
would you cry
because i’ve been trying to be someone else
would you just sit there
would you hold me
would you tell me bye

in every possibility i have in my head
you don’t love me back
so i know it can’t be possible

no one ever told me 6.24.25 (4:21 pm / 16:21)
why is it that no one ever prepares you
no one ever thinks you might come to a place like this
that you'll stray off the path and be drawn to the darkest corners of the forest

no one ever explains to you how sadness works
how it clings to you
and you can never shake it off
how it hides and then snaps its teeth bites you
when you dare to be happy

no one ever warns you about panic attacks
how you'll suddenly be dying dying dying
breath gone

no one ever tells you about the dark
how it consumes you
and becomes you
how you become empty
gone
alone

no one every tells you how to be okay
how to stop wanting oblivion death nothing
how to stop cutting
how to be happy

or it seems at least no one ever told me

[playing: second guessing by alina]

one thing and then the other 6.4.25 (8:00 pm) / 20:00)
sometimes i wonder-
well
so many things
a lot really

is betrayal just a metaphor?
for what, honestly, i’m falling apart
i can barely tell what i feel like anymore
sad? happy? one thing and then the other

i’m not in control anymore
i’m a control freak, yes
i can’t stand not knowing what happens next
i’m afraid

maybe i’m spiraling down
or maybe i’m standing on regular ground?
maybe i’m falling falling falling
or maybe you’re holding me up?

maybe everything is breaking shattering broken
or it could be all fine?

maybe i’m laughing maybe i’m smiling
maybe i’m crying maybe my tears are flooding
the floor and drowning me
maybe i’m happy.

i really don’t know

i will love you 5.27.25 (4:34 pm / 16:34)
do you think that anything could make me stop loving you?
do you think that anything you do
anything you say
anything you want
anything you love
anything you wish for
could make me stop loving you?

even if you fall someday for somebody else
even if the earth blows up
and even if the oceans drown us
even if i die right now

i will love you
forever
and from the grave

[playing: would you fall in love with me again by jorge rivera-herrans and anna lea]

Mr. Selfish loves himself
He doesn't care about anyone else
All he does is spew spew spew
About how much better he is than you

Mr. Selfish is a liar
He doesn't care if your mind is on fire
All he cares about is himself
And couldn't give a **** about anyone else

Mr. Selfish pretends to be sweet
He fools everyone into thinking there's nothing to defeat
If you are hurt he wouldn't cry
In fact he'd laugh and wish you'd die

Mr. Selfish is my name
I am evil and I am insane
All I care about is myself
Everyone else can go **** themself.