The strain on me is much,
Th clutch of death seem a relief,
The burden of life seem hard to bear,
And its scars unsightly

I breath in am choked,
The air acrid and horrid,
The grim awaken and seeks me,
I have ran for four decades,
Its snares i have escaped,
When i just feel relief,
I then hear grim on my path again.

At times i got tired i needed rest,
The unending has had a toil on me,
Am a living zombie,

If i let death get me,
I know pain will just be for once,
Then eternal peace i will be ,
Or so I think.

Then i heard him call,
Daddy daddy is all he could say,
My heart melted and swelled with joy,
Another smaller version of me.

If i go today, who will be called daddy,
Whom will the younger me look upto,
Who will guide and defend,
Who will coach and direct .

I have made a resolution,
Against all odds and thought,
If not for me, let me be ,
I will fight it, I will engage
I will not make it easy,
I will never go down without a fight,
Just for the younger versions of me.

Vulnerable ain't weak
Hurting ain't broken
Pausing isn't giving up
Tired isn’t beaten

bulletproof vest.

Yet, I still bled.

Crossed my heart,

and held my head.



.

it just doesn't
come naturally
there's an awkwardness
a failure
to accurately convey
what needs
to be
conveyed

either that
or uncontrolled words
twist sentences
contort the sentiment
that was intended

feigning the expected
mimicking those witnessed
bought success
in the past
but
under closer scrutiny
the charade
would be discovered

for now though;
this silence
has drawn on
far
     too
           long
without response

another chance
wasted