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 Jul 2017 Xiao - SparKticas
g
5 year old me
thought it was
sharing things with people
crying with them

12 year old me
thought it was
holding hands
the term "boyfriend"

15 year old me
thought it was
kissing
touching

18 year old me
now understands
love comes in many different forms
sometimes in words
sometimes in expressions
sometimes in staying
and sometimes in leaving.
maybe someday i can fully comprehend what love is :")
 Jul 2017 Xiao - SparKticas
kgl
i miss you is harder to say than i love you.

i love you is difficult, it's true.

but i miss you suggests something more;
"you were here, now you're not, i'm hurting from a lack of you."

and that somehow feels more vulnerable than love
whose fleeting, temporary words
i have said to those
i now most abhor.

love's promises and delights
are crushed into dust
while i miss you means
"i want more."
not really a poem, more a thought.
I have fallen
Into the ashes
Of what we were
You have forgotten
Who I am
The minute I fell
Into the mess you made
I have fallen
Away from us
Because I was never enough
To make you feel alive
So instead I died
I have fallen
To my heartbreak
Because I somehow thought
You would change.
Exhausted.
And completely drained;
Of songs being played on the radio over,
And over,
How I have to spent my time,
Alone.
Noticing,
Almost everything.

Almost.
And lonely.
Almost there,
I almost let them go,
But I am a sea of hello and goodbyes.
They are the waves that comes back everytime.
Without failing.

Lonely,
If there’s a more accurate word,
To describe being,
Alone.
With emotions,
Which then I’ll turn into words and words,
Of poems.

I am tired,
From this rain,
I want sunshine.
Not to live in;
Vain.
I just don't
Want to share
You with
Anyone

I need you
I want you
I think about you
Is that my fault?

Others treat you
Like you are nothing
And pass you around
Like it's a joke

That's why I stay
Inside
Don't let anyone
See me and you hide
This poem is about alcohol, take drinking seriously
i hope i find you someday
again.

walking down the street
as beautiful as the first day
again.

wearing same smile
world in your eyes.

bearing all this while
my reason to be alive.

i hope i find you someday
again.

walking down the street
and it's about to rain.

i hope i see you like that
once again.

i know then,
i'll remember your voice
for in the end,
i had no choice but to
delete you

and now after so many
years without you

i still don't have a clue
if there was any without you

for i can still feel you
in my arms

as if you never left
as if you have always been.

you were right here always
in my dreams,
walking down the street,
like we're still sixteen.

always.
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