You were asleep
When I walked into your room
You're the one person
Who I would wake up
I put my hand on your shoulder and sit down
Your eyes open
You're still in your work shirt
I take your earrings off
I give you my hands and move close
"So warm," you say
"Only your hands are cold"
I would walk through your double doors
rarely are they both open
And everything is warm in this house
Only my hands are cold
And the sky's heart of fire
in this sea of burning coal
Our feet feel the bricks get warmer
Only my hands are cold
And when the rare day comes
You're chilled to the bone
I would run to help you
Only...my hands are cold

My dear Icarus,
Have you brought tales of gold for me?
You-- the master of self,
The one who held his own thread and shears.
Don't share of how hard you beat your wings
But how the air beat against your brow.
Don't echo your father's faded cries
But sing the songs of the Aegean sea--
Sing them only for me!

My sweet Icarus,
Is the world as grand as the travelers say?
Are crumbling maps and hand-spun tales nothing to compare?
I've read of Sicily, where your father rests his mourning head.
I've traced its rivers as they curved against my torn papyrus.
Sicily, the land of Aetna.
Oh, to watch the land shake at the beckoning of her call
(Oh, to fly free of these labyrinth walls)!

My darling Icarus,
Tell me-- is life better above the blanket of Grecian blue?
Is it better than what the Fates designed?
Is it better than what I hold today
(please, let it be more than today)?

My beloved Icarus,
Will you give me your wings--
The mingling of feather, wax, and dreams.
Will you give me your wings and
Your will to yearn higher and higher

So that I too can reach the city of gold.

I watched as the sun broke over the horizon.
It occurred to me that nothing
In its most natural essence
Could ever be more beautiful.
Nothing could be more constant
Than the sun rising and setting
East to west
Every dusk and dawn.

I wondered
Why couldn't I be as beautiful
As that sky on which my eyes were fixed?
After all
They do say
We're made up of those same particles;
We may as well be one with the stars.

So, if in fact, that statement is true
How could I be so cold and dark?
Why does the darkness inside me
Never dissipate with a rising sun.
Why don't the kaleidoscopic colors
Infiltrate my darkness.

With the rising sun
And the pinks and purples spreading across the early morning sky
I wonder why I will never be anything other than
Dark.

small cheap rooms where you walk
down the hall to the
bathroom can seem romantic to
a young writer.
even the rejection slips are
amusing because you are sure that
you are
one of the best.

but while sitting there
looking across the room
at the portable typer
waiting for you on the table
you are really
in a sense
insane

as you wait for
one more night to arrive to sit and
type Immortal Words--but now you
just sit and think about it
on your first afternoon in a strange city.

looking over at the door you
almost
expect a beautiful woman to walk in.

being young
helps get you through
many senseless and terrible
days.

being old
does
too.

upon a ledge i felt this urge
to look beyond
the rock under my feet
crazy
is not a goal
a destination maybe
listened to people
some experts on cliff psychiatry
say
an urge to jump
is an urge to live
so high places
I seek
precarious
a bit
of anxiety sensitivity
some said
I look out over
the roofs
after all
down is where
we go
eventually

A bad liar could speak truth
If he could at first speak dreams
and Wishes become wants
and wants tie in the seams.

I wish I wanted to be clean
I wish I wanted the best for me
and one day I will find what it means

to be purity

I see two different places,
one out of each eye
And it keeps causing my wires to get crossed just like my footsteps
I'm always tripping over my own two feet, like a kid wearing their mom or dad's shoes
I just don't seem to have it down, yet

I've seen a few dozen worlds,
met a few hundred folks
Maybe even thousands
I honestly stopped counting
Too many fake names and forced handshakes
Too many lines traced over my skin by people completely and obviously unworthy of my time
I've loved the horrible
The evil
The insane
I don't believe in the devil, but I swear, I once slept along his side
Kissed him every morning
And said "I love you" every time
I've danced with werewolves under the full moon
I've ripped the flesh from innocent bones and howled with all my friends
I've captured fireflies and held the galaxy in my hands
But I've never been happy

Things have always had a way of working themselves out
I'm lucky to be alive after all the times I've teased death with my body
I've shown him parts of me no one else has seen
He knows me well
And he's waiting patiently for me to be his

I'm walking forward with heavy boots slowing down my progress, but the heaviness is only making me stronger
By the time I reach my destination, I'm going to be ******* unstoppable
I hope you're ready for me when I show up on the other side of the shadow