In this small world
Everybody has his own world
#world #

this is how i have chosen to show my love for you
i wrote you a poem
i haven't written in so long
that spiders have claimed their home
at the crook of my right palm
i try not to pick a pen up
just so i won't disturb them
but this is how i have chosen to show my love for you
i want to write you a poem
although i have forgotten every stored metaphor
every beautiful way to say,
'you are like the sun on a rainy day'
and i can't seem to remember
all the comforting ways to say,
'i want to be there for you'
you see, this is how i have chosen to show my love for you
i will write you a poem
because i have never really been good
at saying the right thing at the right time
but somehow
i have discovered the Lost and Found
between my mouth and my hands
where the words i have lost on my lips
have been found on my fingertips
this is how i have chosen to show my love for you
i want to tell you
you don't have to be alone
and carrying heavy things is always easier
with someone else to help lift the weight
don't you think that the world is too heavy
to be carried all on your own shoulders?
let me help
for it is how i have chosen to show my love for you
because for a while i have thought
that i had nothing left in me
but maybe i still have little pieces left
and i will find them
so you can borrow them
just until you find yours too
i hope you see
that this is how i have chosen to show my love for you
because for the longest time
i have been afraid to write
but this is how i have chosen to show my love for you
i wrote you a poem

her body;

i refuse to compare it to another 60's                                      
                      ­                                   cliché.
she's not a movie, not a painting.
not a flower.
not a galaxy.

she's unique enough
to be called
         a
            river
                   of
                       her
                             own

because her body is made from the same matter clouds are made of.
mountains, oceans, fields cannot compare, to the pretty girl
with the curves
that could drown you
or make you
                              float


away, she is nicotine,
she is the balloon that guided my dreams
she leaves and i do too
wherever she goes i will follow.
a quest to look for the very strengh that belongs in the core of her eyes.

if she could only see
the way she looks to me.

I am defined
By the blood
And tears I've shed,

I was formed
By the pieces
That were put together,

I am not whole
Not who I was
Not what I want
But what I got,

I was made
Not made from clay
And a hand,
But from flesh
And a knife

Who I am isn't due to love
Who I am was caused by fear
But that doesn't make me less
It makes me more,
I should remember that
I came from pain
And have made it far.

One step forward,
two steps back.
Every day brings
another setback,
another backtrack,
another reminder
of the things I lack.
My mind never quiets,
I can't take the feedback.
An eternal panic attack,
I should double the Prozac,
it's making a comeback.
One step forward,
two steps back.

I hate the way I wanted to be with you more than you’ll ever be.
I hate the way I talk about you more than you’ll speak of me.
I hate the way I’ve always thought of you when I never crossed at yours
I hate the way I sacrifice things without your appreciation.
I hate the way you talk to me when I cry in pain.
I hate the way you walked out on me when everything’s messed up.
I hate the way you get mad more than I should be.
I hate the way you can’t fight for me and just apologize for what I am.
I hate the way you make me feel bad of loving you more than I should have.
I hate the way I still love you more than the pain I never thought I could bear.
I hate the way I feel that I love you more than you’ll ever be.
I hate the way I feel.
I hate the way I feel selfish and selfless at the same time.
I hate the way I prioritize you more than anyone else.
I hate you but I hate myself more for not hating you as much as I love you.
It will never be the same.
‘Cause there is no amount that would be greater than the love I have for you.
I hate myself more than you’ve ever love me.

Absence doesn't always make the heart grow fonder
Sometimes it makes it forget
And what doesn't **** you doesn't always make you stronger
Sometimes it tears you apart with regret