she gave me her nudes
she was bare
and naked
and so out
and open
and i willingly
accepted it
because it wasnt the nudes
that showed her body
the physical aspects
that made her beautiful
it was the words
she didnt choose
and the spontaneity
that left her
either from her lips
or her fingers
or ink

she was as bare
as her nudes
and i accepted
her for her.

I can no longer be lost

Among the stars

Wishing to shine

More brightly than others

Never content in my own

Light


When I have finally realized

That it is no longer the time

To light up a starless sky

In this age of dreams

Bright than a thousand suns


For there are trinket souls

Of a rare and fragile beauty

Like corals in a paperweight

Abandoned by a world

Mindlessly chasing transient

Glamours


I cannot sow every seed

In this spring of an evermore

Inexperienced yet happier world

Of self-fulfillment


I cannot bring the sun

To every shadowed

And unfortunate being

Yet to be blessed with the

Summer of a much

kinder world

  

I cannot save every leaf

Falling soundlessly  

Within this autumn of a

Wizened universe


I cannot shield every

Hungry soul from

This wintry world of

Indifference


But I see a trinket soul

Around me, around

All of us

Fading, almost invisible

Withering and suffering


They are beautiful

But not glamorous

So no one praises them

Like they do to the others

Around these glass souls


They are not poor

Not hungry

Not visibly sick

Nor in desperate

Need of care

So no one ever

Rushes to their side


So they've build a wall

Around themselves

Without doors

Not that they don't

Want anyone to knock


It's just that they know

No one will knock

And deafening silence

Suffocates them


And they can’t stand

Being overlooked

By the seekers

The seekers of

The brightest and darkest

Stunning brilliance and

Obvious sorrow


Some of them feel like

They need the whole world

To love them to death

And no attention is ever enough


But, no one can really

Handle the weight of

The universe

The weight of a billion

Judging eyes on their

Already vulnerable and

Solitary shoulders


They have so much love to give

But they don’t know how to give

Those that already have enough

Couldn’t care less for them


Those that also built a wall

Around themselves

Cower to be broken

By equally fragile mirrors

Of themselves


Most of them have turned to hate

They despise this indifferent world

That have rejected them

Even when the world have done

Nothing to them


Like the empty glass shells

They have become

They project their inner

Bitterness upon every

Living soul

Even those that are hurting

Invisibly just as much as

Them

So the world stayed away

From each and every

Glass child

As it seemed that

There is no cure

For an unseeable illness

Spreading among those

With healthy and able

Bodies


And I was one of them

I wasn’t exactly sick

Mentally or physically

I was just angry

Stubborn

Unhappy


I tried to fight the world

And despised everything

Threw my tantrums

And begged for love

While being the least

Lovable person


And then something happened


I wouldn’t say I burst through my wall

I wouldn’t say I tore it down completely


But, I found my mirror

I found another glass being

That seemed bitter on the outside

But held so much sweetness

Ready to burst through the shell

Yet afraid to be wasted on

Another bland or bitter soul


I gave it all of my love

Even if it’s like artificially

Earning that love through

The looking glass

Loving myself in the process


I never broke both of

Our walls

Yet, I learned to be

A little happier

I learned to love the world

Just a little bit more

Not because I was for once

Or ever above everyone else

In this world

But I was at last a more

Significant part of a little universe

I wasn’t never the sun in anyone’s

Heart

But I like to think I was a moon

In the starless dream of nights


And

At last I was in possession

Of a trinket soul

Beautiful and sweet

That might never light up

The sky

But it finally

For once,

Lit up my whole world

of one thing
i am sure
and that is
that i am
unsure of
myself
and it’s funny
how i can’t
sleep but my
chest closes its
eyes and hums
with a heartbeat
that is unsure of
itself, too.
i try to morph
into a body
i don’t feel
belongs to me
just so i can
fit somewhere
fit in somewhere
and i tell so
many stories
about the
universe, it
forever feels
like i am trying
to remain lost.
i am unsure
of myself;
connecting the
moles on my
skin as if they
will spell out
something bigger
so i can feel
like i matter,
at least for
a little while.
i sleep beside
myself, stare at
a reflection
so unfamiliar
i couldn’t even
identify it in
a crowd of
strangers, but
i am trying.
and one day
i’m sure i’ll
be sure
of myself but
until then,
i’ll morph into
someone i can
be proud of
and hope that
the universe
sends me back
to myself.