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Gwen Pimentel Jul 2017
I lost my mother

No, not to death
I lost my mother to technology
To social media
To that ******* Facebook
I lost her to the bright rectangular shard of glass that was her phone

There she could reconnect with her friends
See what they were doing
Reunite with long lost childhood buddies
And see cute videos of dogs and babies

I used to love going on dates with my mom
Just the two of us
Most would say we were like sisters
We shared clothes and stories
And life lessons in between
Sips of coffee and slices of cakes
And walks in malls just because we wanted aircon

But now when I'm sitting across her at the table
Her eyes fail to meet mine
If they do all she'd say was wait, I'm replying
Then her eyes would fall back to the screen of her phone
Never-ending conversations became conversations that never even started
Loud chatter above food became silence so loud I could hear myself chew
Laughter and smiles were all the same except they were done looking down, facing a phone

And now I would rather dine alone
Than dine infront of someone glued to their phone
And that says a lot coming from someone with social anxiety and fear of being alone
Because if instead of talking to me your talking to your phone
I really would rather just be alone
I promise you it's not that different

Social media was designed to make us all connected
Countries apart, continents in between
We could talk and call like we were together at that very moment
But now the people were beside
The people we can touch and feel
The people with us physically
We forget to talk to, we ignore
We become disconnected with
Yes, you are retying old ties with your old friends who are miles away
I get that
And I am more than happy for you
That you and your highscool friends talk again
But what's the use of making new ties if you don't keep the ones you have now

I lost my mother to technology
I don't know if it's too late
I know technology won't stop advancing any time soon or any time in the future for that matter
But I have faith
I know beneath my mothers eyes glued to the screen
are the same eyes as the ones that first laid their eyes on me
Who looked at me ever so lovingly,
Like the most precious gift in the world

I lost my mother to technology
And I hope it's not too late to find her again
I fear the thought of failure
my name written in the dirt
spat upon
Standing in line
picked out
like a painting
framed,
ashamed of what..
of who I've become
The mistakes
the bad things
Horrible
Unkind
I look back down
at my name in the dirt
a gravelly scribble
I grab a stick,

*Strikethrough.
Your mistakes make you human.
Kara MacLean Jan 2012
You are entitled, they say
I asked for too much on christmas.
I asked for time, and wished for difference.

She stands on stilts and judges outsiders
This is all for you, she claims
From behind the shattered window pain.

I gave birth to you, she says.
You are an adult.
Scratch that.
You are a child.
Strikethrough.
You are a burden.

I am crippled without her
I am broken when she's near
She doesn't want to hear

She's too far gone.
Neon lights Oct 2014
I spent one of my days, somewhere at the end of October, facing all my fears
I let them through my mind and everyone got infected by bad vibes from me
That day I woke up to some distant rambling of my parents fighting
I found myself falling back into sleeping sweet embrace and awake at 9:30, finding dad sleeping on the stairs.
The day before, mum put oil on my hair and I complained about the smell that doesn't fade away after washing it  four times.

I was thinking of buying books and listening to music but can't because mum is beside me
And I don't like doing anything near her.
I asked her if I could change my glasses frame if I get straight A's for finals
She asked me to find a hammer to nail my bamboo box together
I wanted to show her a picture I took at school with another seven people of which I don't even know three of them
but end up telling myself not to because I don't want her to critize my funny body posture.

My sisters came home and suddenly all in a rush rummaging through some old things behind my closet.
They found a picture of me when I was six and another one when I was eleven taking a picture with my favourite teacher.
I told mum to get rid of my kindergarten ones but she kept them
Next thing I knew, I lost the one when I was eleven.

I saw the printer wire and my sister insisted that we should put it up so mum did and I fixed it. I fixed the printer and clear the carriage jams and all while putting up with all of the screamings going on between both my parents and both my sisters.
I blasted ******* bands in my ears and running loud thoughts in my head.

That day I cut my nails only on my left hand
Later, one my right hand finger is stained from printer ink.

Evening came and dusk came, night came. Midnight came.
I talked to the only person I'm sure I love and reachable. Autumn.
She's 17 and leaving school next year also very worried about her big exam on Nov 3.
She told how her emotional day went that day from how her classmate cried and her teacher cried too so that night
she got into the shower and cried and I said that it is okay
and we talked about biology and saliva and ulcers.
I listened to Good Riddance that night for how it constantly reminds me of people I love: Autumn and Luke and people I loved: Nightingale.

One of my friend also had the same vibe saying she is afraid of tomorrow, afraid of turning fifteen next year just like me.
We laughed about our first day going to school few years back then.
I brought up all those people I used to know and asking myself where did they go?
Or was I'm the one who disappeared?
Night came as I sit on a dying school chair listening to the ******* loud TV downstairs
I made coffee and listen to those voices.
Dad switched off the TV I was left with a strangling silent even with music on full volume.

Unconsciously, I grasped the coffee mug in front of me
clinging to its blistering warmth and started to cry for no reason just draining out the weight of life of today.
I shut my eyes with intent to barricade those tears from falling
but
it just pools and pour out and didn't cease and I just let them be until I hear someone going upstairs.
Oh how embarassing to see me in this state wiping off tears on the sleeves of my shirt where my heart should have been

Here I am in this endless mirage with a mug of coffee listening to the low hum of voices so familiar and imagery of many people that I'd like to take their pain away
just to let them breathe for a while.
I sipped the bitter coffee to the last drip
I tried not to think of those times when I haven't listen to this one song quite awhile
and
just before I press play it crossed my mind what if this song changed
It was kind of disappointing that it didn't but the feelings I had for this song did change
I took a few glance at my bookshelf and lost in this flashback when I used to measure my height on it
and
adding another 28 cm just to see how tall Luke was and it turns out he was taller than my bookshelf
so before I went to sleep on the same night, I told myself that I need to be at least 175 cm.

I lean against my chair trying hard to recall when did those things happened?
It can't be that long ago but
the image is so unreachable in my head.
Today, it's emotional day Autumn said it's an emotional day and
I said strikethrough 'an'
Today, life seemed as inevitable as death is
I'm here with no particular purpose of living set in my mind except surviving against a few little distraction
and
let me tell you this

*I like it.
Today is the day and this is what I've gone through today

(12:23AM)
Dhaara T Feb 2017
I don't want to lose you
But I fear I would
If I told you the truth
About how I feel
Oh, where do I start?
Would you stop?
When you stare at me with curiosity
My confidence quivers
Let me speak my mind
And my heart too
Let me let you know
Just how much I love you
You have no idea
You fail to understand
The depths of my feelings
The emotions I swim in every day
You're unaware of what you mean to me
And I fear when I let you know
I will lose you
Because somewhere along
I know the feeling isn't mutual
But because I love you so much
my darling friend
I will muster the courage
To break the silence, risk an end
But I will not bend
To the hands of fear
If fate so desires that you push me away
So be it, but know, you'll always be dear
And now, hush now
Don't you say a word, let me finish
You need to know this
Let me begin, let me finish
Tell me, once I'm done...
Can't we just be friends
Without the romance of romantic love?
For friendship is just as beautiful
and there is a certain romance about pure love
of friendship, nothing more, nothing less
So why can't we be <strikethrough>just</strikethrough> friends?
In friendship, a lot of love is lost. In love, friendship.
Gabriel  Mar 2018
misotheism
Gabriel Mar 2018
do you think he spoke, on the fifth day
before his mistake?
'what beauty, what boundless unerring awe
what great stroke of mighty ingenuity befalls me -‘
his tongue silenced by the sixth

and on the sixth day; man
so let it be written, so let it be done
crudely misspelt, an ink-blotted mess, peeking out from a strikethrough

was the seventh day spent in sleep
or in grief?
in all 6 stages of it, simultaneously?
how could he rest
knowing what his hands had done?

&
if we are made in his image
what ghastly beast sits in his mirror?
what horror portrays him
what stares back from the dark water of a lake?
underneath white walled parallels
the steel beam cemented in block

I think

is if we fail us
in 3D actuality

we stand not even
one oblique chance
with other elses
ever

start thinking it best
to hedge on those bets
table the looming
beyond believables

just to keep cracked
the door to possibility
of extraordinary love

to not strikethrough
reveries pristine
of one day being
lit perpetually
Silver Heinsaar Jun 2017
Turned on my computer, had a conversation with your mother. Sometimes i wonder which one of you actually cares. She has always been there for me from the beginning. Whenever we would have an argument, she would chat me up privately, listen all the problems me and you were having, trying to work it out, offer solutions but you're stubborn and would only get even more upset.
I blamed myself, i'm too needy and like to be in control of your activities. One could say that to a certain point i was being manipulative but i didn't abuse it. That's something i hate more than anything. I guess i just pushed you away... and here i go again, blaming myself. Honestly though, you never really had time for me, your friends were more important and our constant fights about doing things together never ended well because when you weren't with your friends, you wanted to be alone and recharge yourself until i finally had enough and now i'm opening my notepad to write you the following:
*I printed my feelings
The font i used was comic sans
Italic or bold, won't make a difference
Because all the words were strikethrough
That's how much they matter to you
We're over and i love your mother
Be a good daughter and disappear
Needless to say, you were never here
Actually, i can't have that
After all i'm going to be your stepfather
So i hope we get along
PS, your mother looks good in a thong.
Dear Edward,

[When]
In Search of Lost Time[,]
[Try} Looking Through the Glass Of Mice and Men

Anne of Green Gables
'Knew Why the Caged Bird Sings

[While] The Great Gatsby
[had]
Great Expectations
[in]
A Tale of Two Cities

[T'was]
Steel-heart[ed]
[but]
Insufferable

Ida B.
[friended]
Jane Eyre,
Emma,
Rebecca,
Matilda,
Heidi,

Robinson Crusoe,
Frankenstein,
Dracula,
Ulysses,
Pippi Longstocking,

Othello,
Hamlet, [and]
Sherlock Holmes-
[and?]
The Catcher in the Rye

Something Wicked This Way Comes[-]
I've Been Told There'd be Cake
[but alas, too late-]
Things Fall Apart
As I Lay Dying

...

Far From the Madding Crowd
Tender is the Night

The Grapes of Wrath
[is found when]
Looking for Alaska
[with]
The Fault in Our Stars[...]
[a.k.a.]
Romeo and Juliet

To **** A Mockingbird
[thy needs a temperature of]
Fahrenheit 451

[One more thing-]
Pride and Prejudice
[is]
Deathless

[Okay, fine, more than one:]
The Witch of Blackbird Pond
[was at]
The Last Book Party

[so were the]
Invisible Monsters
[and]
The Lord of The Flies[.]

[In the]
Dying of the Light[,]
Divergent
[and]
Breathless[,]

[emerged]
The Lightning Thief

...

[Ultimately, in the end]
[strikethrough "And Then"] There Was None


Love,
Stargirl
SeaChel  Mar 2018
Untitled
SeaChel Mar 2018
Not a poem, just a (silly) question.  I remember a few years ago being able to select italics, bold, strikethrough, etc.  How do you italicize/bold words now?  I've seen it in recent works from others, but for the life of me can't figure it out.

Thank you,
Seachel <3
The best chapter in the book
Most re-read pages of all

with creases on its once smooth edges
Your fingerprints on her pages

Yellow strikethrough markers drawn across her words

You have marked your territory
Made her yours

There is no denying it

The chemistry

Each time your eyes are fixed on Cambria

Her words come flooding through your medulla
A shock wave of euphoria mixed with jolts of guilt

Then you realize

Oh ****!!

She marked her territory!!!
She made you, HERS.

©Belema. S. Ekine
c rogan  Aug 2022
trillium trail
c rogan Aug 2022
Waiting as the leaves float above us  
Delicate joints forgive gravity
As the ground shifts beneath  
Bed of grass

Are you happy?  The wind is blowing north.  You are not a burden.

Warm sassafras earthen outlines
Wispy milkweed nebula within the path
Leaping into further fields,
Splendid happenings in our house of clay,
Sculptures of pure weightlessness.

The rain will come at 4, so we watch the field.
Like the early morning,
The first night,
The windows down, the hills, the trees, feeling safe, feeling missing, feeling music  
Shimmer down the back of my neck.  
Feeling isolation, too little, too much, nothing, everything.  
Meanings are alienated: her ideas connected to mine.
Ambient colors blend in swatches of light.  
The artist stands up, spills the paint, smears the light.
Art is for souls written in silhouettes.



We run barefoot in grass,
Towards the approaching gray
Blades cling to glistening legs like strikethrough text.
Self and ego unite
Thoughts drift as leaves suspended in the rising stream
This rain is an unfinished thought.

The pressure change comes like a broken bone.  
Trillium wildflowers parallel the ravine
Delicate white bodies bend
As warmth is pushed higher,
Water condenses and falls:

Time is places and places are time
Sleeping in old beds,  
Scents of warmth,  
Snow collected over antique film
A garden buried in hibernation,
Sleeping yet seeing
Withering velvet songs underground
Echo in pastel church bell skies.
They taste of light,  
They dream of dawn.
I am not in the garden, it is myself.  It is him.
The cathedral glass swells,
Growing and shrinking like the stars.


Memories  
of dancing in the  
kitchen, steam from boiling pots  
of water hanging on  
windows open to  
pine trees,  
muffled songs.  


Memories of falls petrified in ice.  We climbed a fire tower, slipping between steep planks of lumber to the top of the fall sunset, the moonrise, a red disk on the open horizon.  
He is playing chess.  My mind is quiet.  I have made my bed.
The colors stretch into a fine line- white light permeates the new home.

— The End —