Today in an overweight society,
The type of society that deals anxiety,
Anxiety, anxiety, in this overweight society.

Today in an overweight society,
The type of society where diet pills are a normality,
Normality, Normality in an overweight society.

Today in the eyes of an underweight tragedy,
Influenced so greatly by an overweight society,
Tragedy, Tragedy, in an overweight society.

Influenced by a society of fatty foods,
Fear becoming a more common mood,
The fear of falling into the normality
The normality of this tragedy.
The overweight society.

Influence by obesity.
Striving to be what their minds see,
The minds of the children trapped,
Trapped by this overweight society.

Influenced by the skinny girls on TV
Only followed by ads showing fatty foods society demans you eat
Have a cheeseburger, upgrade to a large fry, yet still look like her, it's pounded in her mind.

Young minds believe what they see.
Morphed into the tragedy of society.
A society where eating disorders strive
A society where an 8 year old can consious you starve themselve to feel pretty.
The definition of pretty based simply on TV
Yet nobody questions this more than imperfect society.

Elementary ages childern being fed fat then forced to stand in front of a mirror.
Put a toy in poison and call it magic.
Oh yes, what a fantasy.
A fantasy forcing you into reality.

The reality becoming your worst nightmare.
The reality of your fears driven by society.
I'm overweight, yet pizza is the best choice for a happy family.

A society where mental illness strives.
Why can't people open their eyes?
Spoon feeding childern poison and expecting them to love themselves.

In school teachers force health into thier minds.
At home, parents feed them poison to save time.
Re-creating, reprogramming their fragile little minds, yet still expecting them to feel fine.

Feeling down?
Have a happy meal, gain a pound.
Overweight?
Shame, shame, you must maintain the image.
The image forced into your mind.
           This was our greatest fall.
           Upon dieting we call.
           Skelington stave me.
Anorexia at it's finest.
Anorexia thin and spineless.
Some call you timeless.
But only recently you made your debute.
Make me feel brand new.
Reprogram my mind.
Make me feel fine.
Thank God for thinsperation.
Oh Anorexia, my new inspiration.
Make me feel pretty.
Just like the skinny girls on TV.
Loosing pounds, one by one.
Still weighed down by a ton.
The weight of pleasing it.
The nightmare society created.
Influenced by what we see.
Finally morphed into the tragedy of the normality of this weight obsessed society.

This addiction is bad
These injections will change your life
It is everything, it is nothing, it is unexplainable
Like being stabbed a million times with a knife

It burns my whole body
Inside and out
I want to stop so bad
But it fills my mind with doubt

I become obsessive,
Sometimes I'm in rage
Even saying something simple
Will put me on a rampage

There are bugs in my skin
I get constant heat flashes
I can't stop itching
It leaves me with gashes

Your friends become enemies
Every family member is now a stranger
No one can be around you
Everyone is in danger

I'm loosing my body
I'm loosing mind
This specific drug,
It's the worst kind

I can't feel my body
Now it's all down hill
I no longer shake
I am completely still

My vision is impaired
Feels like it was injected into my eyes
I lay here stiff as a board
As my body slowly dies

My anxiety is taking over
My anxiety is taking over
My life, is not yet over
My life, is not yet over
I'm stone cold, yeah and sober
I'm stone cold,  yeah and sober
My anxiety is breaking me down
Its causing me to drown
It erased my smile
I've been without it a long, long while
And replaced it with a frown from a clown
My anxiety is taking over
My anxiety is taking over

I feel like I'm always losing
Even tho I should be winning
I'm close to losing this fight
Even tho I'm giving it all my might
I try to breathe, I can't breathe
My anxiety is killing me
I roll over, I become colder
My blanket is giving me the cold shoulder
Im usually hot, but tonight I'm not
I'm doing a better now,  I'm remaining sober somehow
I'm one year older
I endure pain, i experience fear
I don't feel I compare to all of my peers
Because of that these eyes are pouring tears
Everyday I ask whats keeping me here
Just a misunderstood youth, who speaks the truth
It doesn't matter how much these eyes rain
No one ever understands my pain
When poison entered my veins
Never once did I complain
It knew my name
It played my game
It was a hard lion to tame
I have been robbed
For falling for the wrong heartthrob
Never again will i bring my walls down easily
My anxiety defeating me will not be easy

My anxiety is taking over
My anxiety is taking over
My life, is not yet over
My life, is not yet over
I'm stone cold, yeah and sober
I'm stone cold,  yeah and sober
My anxiety is breaking me down
Its causing me to drown
It erased my smile
I've been without it a long, long while
And replaced it with a frown from a clown
My anxiety is taking over
My anxiety is taking over

I'm remaining in the slow lane, I'm staying in the right lane
Just because I do well at carrying myself
Doesn't mean I'm steady, cuz lets honest, **** is getting really heavy
I'm all the time being put down
I look in the mirror and stare at my frown
I wanna turn it upside down
I wanna know the secret to finding true happiness
Because what I'm feeling isn't happiness
I feel like with my luck **** with end like city of angels
No fairytale ending just a nightmare fable
I do all I can, I know I'm able
To turn over this ******* table
I must find the the right content
It might take me a while
Its something I'm probably going to have to invent
I truly ******* hate this
Is there a secret recipe to ending this
Where is the cheat codes
Triangle, square, circle,X it didn't work
Where is the correct code?
I'm still feeling hurt
Without Chester I feel lost
Withour Wrld I know what's at cost
I wanna hold on, but its getting hard
I have so much but I don't want to loose it all
I'm stronger now but I feel I'm still going to fall

My anxiety is taking over
My anxiety is taking over
My life, is not yet over
My life, is not yet over
I'm stone cold, yeah and sober
I'm stone cold,  yeah and sober
My anxiety is breaking me down
Its causing me to drown
It erased my smile
They replaced it with a frown from a clown
I haven't seen it in a long, long while
My anxiety is taking over
My anxiety is taking over

I can't believe the neglect
I've done to myself
I wanted to eject
I felt like such a reject
I lost my way
And I'm paving it now
I embrace each day
No matter what I'll make it go my way
No more keeping my head down
I'll keep it held high
As I look up into the sky
I am so blessed to still be alive

My anxiety is losing the battle
My anxiety is loosing the battle
I've got my **** handled
I've got my **** handled
No more relying on poison I don't need it
I'm doing the best now better believe it
I'm awake now, no more narrow minded
My heart is free no longer binded
My heart is free no longer binded
My source of warmth is now my friend
It will be with me till the very end
My anxiety is losing the battle
My anxiety is losing the battle

Waiting for your life to begin

Waiting for your team to win


Waiting for the bus to arrive

Waiting for your kid to strive


Waiting for the rain to pass

Waiting for the bell after class


Waiting for the job of your dream

Waiting for things to become what they seem


Waiting for inspiration to come

Waiting to become rich and then some


Waiting for a person to change

Waiting for motion to become a range


Waiting for a bad mood to disappear

Waiting for your head to clear


Waiting for your boss to see your worth

Waiting for heaven on earth


Waiting for what is your due

Waiting for a cue


Waiting for someone to understand

Waiting for your enemies to be banned


Waiting for the world to get better

Waiting for that liberating letter


Waiting for something that will never come

Waiting for things to become undone


Waiting for wisdom to teach you

that waiting is just loosing time to get through

Saved by the Sunflower

A very strong storm was arriving,
there were large black clouds coming from the east,
strong gusting turbulent winds threating to snap everything,
severe down poring of flooding rain,
as if the clouds were crying out in pain,
it did not seem there would be anyway to save the flower garden,
nothing could survive this unannounced exploding of nature,
this seemingly uncontrollable outburst,
something, maybe everything was going to be destroyed,
this day turned in to this night of hell,
the rain, the wind, the flashes of lightning,
this violent death would not be stopped this time,
then a small voice could barely be heard,
at first it was ignored, flicked away like a mosquito,
the voice did not give up though, once again it cried out,
once again it was ignored, brushed aside,
the voice continued gaining strength, it refused to be shut down,
the creator of the storm suddenly took a step back,
looking down to see where this voice was coming from,
it was emanating from this one lone sunflower,
it was the sunflower that had been given the name Perly,
Perly would not, could not be denied as she screamed out,
leave this garden oh evil storm, I will not except the outcome,
the outcome that you predict will occur, we are fighters,
we will never give in to your senseless urges,
please wake up and hear my plea for sanity,
the storm started to weaken, slowly at first, but continued
gaining momentum loosing it's grip on this act of violence
until finally secumbing to this cry of desperation from
the little sunflower. Gradually, the wind stopped blowing,
the rain stopped falling, the sun began peaking thru the clouds.
Perly Sunflower had saved the lives of all the other flowers
in the garden, and the life of gardens caretaker.
A plaque is now erected on this spot proclaiming the
bravery of this little sunflower that would not give in,
would not accept, would not cower away.
The caretaker of the garden professes eternal gratitude
and love for this brave creature of Gods doing.
Thank you Perly sunflower
Gomer LePoet..

Tomorrow morning they are going to take them,
what am I going to do?
He says it doesn’t matter to him, because I have a pretty face.
In all the years we've been married, he’s never told me I had a pretty face.
I don’t think he’s going to be able to handle this.
Hell, I don’t think I'm going to be able to handle this.
God ******, I am going to loose my hair,
I am gonna loose my beautiful ******* hair, then everyone will know.
People will put sanitizer on their hands after they shake mine.
All my friends and family will treat me differently.
They’ll feel sorry for me, they won’t know what to say.
And then there’ll be those who will say too much, or the wrong thing.
"I’ll pray for you", some will say,
But I know what they are thinking, they think....
"that is what she gets for drinking her martinis and smoking her ***".
Some will even say it is God’s will.
**** God!
He is stealing my beauty,
my wonderfully gorgeous ****, my hair.
They are a part of me.
I don’t give a **** what a man thinks about my *******,
that they are **** or voluptuous,
they are a part of me.
And now, like a side of beef,
they are going to section me up and take them from me.
What will they do with them?
I mean after they biopsy.
Can I have them to bury?
Sorry, I know that wasn't necessary, but I am mad.
I am mad and afraid, I am so afraid.
I know my husband, he will never be the same.
He doesn’t **** me with his eyes closed, my **** turn him on.
But then any woman’s **** turn him on.
When he reaches to touch them, there’ll be nothing there.
I’ll look like a little boy, nothing.
Maybe I have identified with them too much,
I have made them a big part of my personality.
I've fed my children with them, my boyfriends fought over them,
they have got me into and out of trouble more than once.
****, I am going to have to get a whole new wardrobe.
And now, in the morning
they are going to cut them off of me
and put them in a stainless steel operating room bowl.
Like chicken fat.
Why do I feel like this,
I didn’t cry when the dentist pulled my wisdom teeth?
What if he told me I had to or else I would die, I’d pulled them myself?
I trim my nails, and get my hair cut and dyed.
I exfoliate my skin.
I lost 10lbs last year and I didn’t shed one tear,
my ******* will weigh more than that.
But I am loosing something else,
I am loosing normal.
I'll have to find a new normal.
I am loosing myself
and replacing it with a different person.
I’ll be one of them,
I’ll be a survivor,
a hero.
I'll hold hands with other survivors and walk 10 miles
and wear a **** load of pink.
Hey, but I don't look too bad in pink.

*later this week a friend is going to have a double mastectomy.  These are just a few of the words I have collected from other breast cancer survivors. I had to do something for her. My hope is that we become more aware of the fear and pain that breast cancer victims go through.

walk away from your computer lay down and make a call

i want you to travel deep into my voice i wont touch you at all

with ya own hand i want you to carress ya face slowly go down to ya breast

rub them squeeze them lick the tip of ya finger and moisten ya ****** yes

glide ya fingers across ya thighs listen to my voice as i take you on this ride

lights off door locked im not in arms reach

but if you close ya eyes my face you will see

i want you in a deep trance

as you explore with your hands

"where i wanna be"

right next to you in the dark, naked between ya sheets

kissing and carressing every inch of your body i want to taste

i go inch by inch i promise to not let a drop go to waste

"wait baby dont let go of the phone"

i know it feels real and right but in reality it is wrong

continue, take that finger you use oh so much and let it play

rub ya **** left to right up and down every which a way

now go inside hit that spot to the left , im ya director baby

switch to the right go deeper in you didnt know ya fingers felt this amazing

you are wet, soaked and yet and still you listen to my voice

begging me to direct you a little bit more

so i explain how my warms lips are ready to explore

my wet tongue adds to the juices you already have flowing

i am eating you slow genuinely feasting on your soup of lust

circular motions on ya **** i know you never felt this and thats y you were about to bust

your fingers have found there way back inside of you for a new journey

now ya body is getting hot, **** *****, amd this nut you want it

chris is going to give it to you

back to being the director i put you in school

my voice guides you to a unforgettable moment

go a lil faster baby on that thing wet ya fingers a lil more

i know you already wet so let ya fingers slide ya ****** to the front door

loose yaself this last time

im ******* ya **** and you are loosing ya mind

ya body gets a chill from ya head to ya toes

you scream chris and i already know

on the phone i read you this *** poetry

now dont instantly stop i say carress it to ease

still i can hear you breathing heavily

you stretch, yawn and say i pushed you to the max

because you never had poetic *******.......

Anxious
Dull, a boy is he
names he would not plea
eyes like baby blue-
lips a crimson hue
Feelings like me and you

Reclusive
Outsiders he'd not choose
In his mansions he bore
luring himself-
with enchanting lore's
drifting away, loosing woes

A Xenos
Traveling in his hallways
unknown, ominous
a wretched life he portrays
even in his heart, he'd say-
"Loneliness, such a Cliché"

Forsaken
Befriended, unseen
though he's not a devil
-for I believe
tortured, battered on thee
delude by his mistress' skim

He Left
portals out from misery
gone himself eagerly
then comes back, with such
-A Victory
for now, a statured man is he

Knights & Kings
upon bended knees
and everything he please
from a man to a boy
-in a dream
A Castle, now he redeems