You think I'm fine
I have nothing to hide
no cuts on my arms
'Cause I'm torn up inside

and when i finally decided to let you go
you showed me the one thing
that you said was never a lie
and that was behind all the black and white
you hid more than the truth
but how you knew how to break me down
and torture me from the inside out

I want to kiss you.
It sometimes physically hurts not to kiss you.
I don't want to look into your eyes,
because I don't want to see the confusion in them.
I don't want to explain myself.
I just want to feel your breathing on my face as
my lips fit onto yours.
I want to slip my thumb
under the line of your jaw,
and tip your head back,
to expose your beautiful, long neck.
I want to run the tip of my nose along it
and to hear nothing but our breathing.
Sometimes I look at that face and
it's like I've been hypnotized,
my greatest desires want to come out.
I want to kiss you sweet god in another life
I would kiss you.
And then afterward,
press a soft hand to your lovely head
and wash the memory from it.

I wish I could put into words
The way I still reach for you
In my sleep

i thought that you were heaven sent
i had no idea of the hell you'd bring
thinking of all the time we spent
screaming when we should sing

you left me hurt, left me bent
left me feeling that bitter sting
wondering where the heaven went
struggling with a broken wing

arms
made for carrying the words that spill out of my mouth
not for holding you together
hands
used to create art and write things that hurt too much to say
not to touch you
chest
made to feed the children I have yet to bear
not for your pleasure
legs
to carry me throughout life
not for you to stare at as I walk by
my body is mine
it is for me and will only ever be