I look for you
In passing faces
A stranger's glance
In haunted places

I feel you among
Nature's grandest setting
It is you that I remember
Even when I'm forgetting

I see you wherever I go
In everyone I meet
Your words echo in conversations
That pass me on the street

Your soft, easy way
That safe familiar tone
That always takes me back
To a time long gone

Do you love me
       Or do you not?
You told me once,
        But I forgot.

What are fallen stars?

Are they
Faded dreams,
Disappointments
Streaking across the night sky
Resoundingly repeating and reminding us of our failures? or

Are they,
The gaiety of children
Running amuck amongst the planets
Causing mischief and mayhem

Could it be,
That they are missives just for me,
Of a love Waiting patiently?

A love
I have yet to find divine
Tangible
A love all mine

Could fallen stars be
Remnants of a broken heart
Broken once too many,
Or love sabotaged?

For you see,
I have yet to find
My true love

But in searching
I have drowned...

In many a
Mirage

My behaviour erratic
My speech far from smooth
These days I can't wait to cut down anyone
Who thinks life is a bed of roses on a cloud
Life is not effortless like the rainbow you so seek
These days people are afraid
The spark dying
The fire extinguishable
Do not be depressed from what I say
There is family to hold you up
And words to console
These things are meant to be
There is a correctness in some rare person
But Me? I am far from right
I am twisted
Like a crooked spine, I hurt
If someone out there feels as I do
That no consolation may come due to uncorrectable mistakes
Please let me not feel so alone
Hopeless cases that we are
Erasures all over our life's draft
I can see my follies plain as day
I can see you clearly
There is a correctness in some rare person
Judgement, I pray you be far from swift and close to gentle
I plan to live out my days trying
Best efforts are like flower buds blooming
I plan to be celebrated for my triumphs over my trials
When I have died trying

you can swim.
but you wont get there.
you can try.
but you wont reach it.
my hands will turn,
and
stroke
and hit,
and
my legs- my legs
will pound like ribbons,
stretching out-
unending.

and then it will end,
no longer will I go.
and bone will turn to thread
and muscle to
heat.

and from the fatigue i will find it
reach it.

every bone a body, every muscle
a life
and everything....
everything water.
water stroking through water
combing
and
twining
to
one
water so intense
in
water so sleek-
so aware of every stroke
every turn
and every hit.

you can try.
but you can never stay
there.