The doctors did everything they could to save you but it wasn't a success.
I knew you were dead when I saw you lying on the hospital bed motionless.
When the nurse examined you, she confirmed that you were gone.
I knew life would never be the same and it would be hard to go on.

You were buried with a stuffed Easter Bunny and a card that I bought for you.
When they lowered you into the ground, saying goodbye was hard to do.
You died on a Wednesday which was your least favorite day.
It has been six years since the date when you passed away.

This year, the anniversary of your death has landed on Wednesday.
You despised that day of the week and your death made my life gray.
When you were in the hospital, you were also visited by your niece.
You were the greatest mother on the planet, may you Rest in Peace.

The Kool-Aid Man isn't cool at all, he's actually a ****.
He's a low life **** bag who poisons people with drugs.
He puts the drugs in the kool-aid, mostly ******* and ****.
He doesn't care that his products cause addiction and death.
He doesn't care who he hurts just as long as he gets paid.
The cops just found his hideout, it's a raid.
He fired at the police because he's out of control.
The police just opened fire and filled him full of holes.
But instead of spilling blood, kool-aid was what was spilled.
Everybody can rest easy because the Kool-Aid Man has been killed.
That's the end of the Kool-Aid Man distributing coke and ****.
The Kool-Aid Man flipped off the cops with his final breath.
The Kool-Aid Man fought the law but he didn't win.
That fat and bloated punk will never say "Oh Yeah!" again.

I moved to this neighborhood forty-two years ago today.
I moved here six months before Elvis Presley passed away.
Crosby Park is the name of my neighborhood.
I've been here for a long time and I'll be here for good.
I still remember the day when I moved here.
It's been over four decades, that's a lot of years.
I became the owner of my property eight years ago in 2011.
My parents gave it to me two years before they went to Heaven.
I moved to Crosby Park forty-two years ago today.
I've been here since I was five and I'm here to stay.

I have a son who is so stupid that I want to give him a slap.
He wanted hushpuppies and I said "We got no time for that crap!"
I'm Buford T. Justice and I'm a bubblegum machine.
I'm the best sheriff that the state of Texas has ever seen.
I've been chasing a man who calls himself the Bandit.
He frustrates me so **** much that I can't stand it.
I've tried and tried but he's somebody who I can't catch.
He drives 110 miles per hour, I've finally met my match.
When I starred in the 3rd Bandit movie, the Bandit turned out to be fake.
My idiotic son and I will catch the real Bandit no matter what it takes.

Certain people like the new Doctor Who TV show but I think It's foul.
If I had a choice between watching it and having dental surgery, I'd choose a root canal.
And rather than watching Doctor Who, I'd rather have that root canal without anesthetic.
I stopped watching the new Doctor Who because It's pathetic.
I loved the classic Doctor Who television show, it was my favorite show on TV.
And I honestly believe that the new Doctor Who has been ruined by the BBC.
If you like and want to watch the new Doctor Who, that's okay.
But If I had a Genie, I'd wish for that **** TV show to go away.

One day Barney Fife was practicing his quick draw.
He accidentally shot Thelma Lou, he broke the law.
Andy had no choice but to put Barney in jail.
But Andy let Barney out when he said he had a crop of marijuana to sell.
Barney offered Andy a fifty-fifty deal.
But Andy wanted it all, he decided to steal.
He shot poor Barney and dumped his body in Myers Lake.
Andy became furious when he learned the marijuana was fake.
The crop of marijuana turned out to be oregano.
Andy was arrested and jail was where he had to go.
Andy will be pounding rocks for the rest of his days.
The Sheriff soon learned that crime doesn't pay.

I didn't get much schooling so I can't read or write.
Many people don't understand my situation and plight.
I thought I was buying sugar but I bought salt.
My cake made people puke and it was my fault.
When I drive, I can't read stop signs so I always crash.
Over thirty people have sued because of whiplash.
When I was seven, Dad wouldn't let me go to school anymore.
When a person can't read or write, it closes so many doors.
I can count to ten but I have to use my fingers and thumbs.
And if you actually believe I can't read or write after reading this poem, you are dumb.