perhaps
i should have
seen the obvious:
the margins between
hope, fear, illusion
and the bitter truth
and how i
shouldn't have
mixed them all
into a blur
to satiate
my innermost
desire.

You.

like the weather in January
nothing certain about our love
like a misty morning in Jakarta
like a switch to turn it on and off.

oh, these melancholic nights.

I pretend to know love
when I fly blind each time I fall

I pretend to know you
when all I do is make you blue
as you do me too.

Worst of all;
I pretend to know myself
when I get lost in my own thoughts
and lie that I am fine each time I am nervous.

now,
my whole existence
doesn't depend
on you

but
it's sure as hell
a whole lot nicer
with you

you are the monsoon that suddenly left after causing a flood in a village called I.

like the golden sunset
slowly turning red
you are the beauty of the world

i cannot deny
         the feelings i have
erupted like Merapi
                       at the sight of your beauty
your voice softly touching me
         like soft wind in May

goodness, i'm in love.