In all my strength as a child
I was a pebble in someone else's shoe
and the boulder he rolled every day.

Dreaming cat beside me
teaching ease.

This ink bleeds
words of betrayal from a lacerated mind.
My fountain heart pumps more imagination.
My pen has an inspiration unkind.
No fruit to be had
yet I hold the rind.
I'd like to find love
but I couldn't find time.

Devastation ravages a tight-knotted soul.
Create room for another.
Make space for a lover.
How far will I fall down that rabbit hole?
The nature of my yearning is conflicted.
A golden road of good intentions
has led down a path convicted.
Followed by all my bad contentions
Winds of Fortune continually shifted.

You see the siren but not the rocks.
A skeleton key but found no locks.

Isolation is seen from the weak to kings.
Desolation leaves no crowns nor rings.

Three cheers for broken things!
Those who god rapes
and what the cat brings
inside causing screams. The last laugh.
Reduced to a shocking object;
denied personal being, a personal hell,
alone, touched by shadows.
All shadows imply light.
Torture of existence transforms to bliss.
This is what you signed up for now give it a kiss.
See and be seen.
Be vulnerable, be keen to love the ugly.
Cringing dancing singing -
Obscene wisdom, divine pain:
******* of fate.
Tainted blood yet the soul won't stain.

Hunger hurts. I have hunger pains.
Last night in a dream I murdered my mother.
What to do with tenacious voracity?
Uncalm, I wait. Breathing.

How can humility match this raging fire within?

The furnace breaths. Alive
in harmony. Hearth built strong.
Bellows balanced in a steady stream.
Useful : Proud in action and function.
My body steams
learning to trust
temperament.