the coffee is brewing,
i hear the clock ticking
the vendors outside, doing their part selling
birds calling out to their mates and their mates, responding.
Everything that’s happening around me, I can sense clearly
But what will happen to you and me?
I wish we had eternal clarity.

The coffee did brew, leaving an essence in the air
But the clock is refusing to tick;
refusing to let this moment pass by
giving me chances that I'm refusing to take
chances to be stuck in the moments our eyes met
the vendor's curious silence
curious to see if I'll make a move
the birds and their mates are quiet now
Waiting for us to say to each other-
“I love you..”

i’ve barely slept,
i’m running on adderal and self loathing,
a mix that has kept me alive for far too long.
i’ve barely slept,
i want you to kiss me until our lips are bruised and touch me hard enough that traces of your fingertips can still be seen on my skin.
i’ve barely slept,
i miss the feeling of someone’s mouth on my neck,
the feeling of gentle kisses starting at my collarbone and falling lower and lower and lower.
i’ve barely slept,
i’m running on adderal and self loathing,
when what i really need is to find my relief in you.

It's kinda cool how when life is normal
rainy days make me lethargic and unmotivated.
But when life is hard and I'm struggling
rainy days are the greatest comfort,
as if the earth is crying with me
saying that I'm allowed to feel it all

When I'm out with friends, I talk
When I'm at home, I regret talking
When I'm angry, I yell  
When I calm down, I regret yelling  
When I eat food, I enjoy it
When I'm done, I regret eating
I regret my entire life

Your fingers caressed the keys
like a gentle waltz
I was utterly transfixed
by the way you carried a conversation
I shivered at each note
the melody resonated within
You were telling the piano about me.

The storm blew through
You can see forever
Stars gaze through
You can see forever
Swayed by the moon
You can see forever
Irrevocable wish I need you
You can see forever
Yet time I wait for you

Adieu

people always leave.