do you ever get in one of those moods where you just want to punch holes in the walls to match the sizes of the ones in your chest and you want to scream until your vocal chords burn as intensely as your longing to be anywhere but here and your eyes will not stop allowing your emotions to flow from your tear ducts and you are so broken and you cannot seem to fix yourself no matter how hard you try yet you have to just shove the tightness in your throat away and pretend like you are okay and I just don’t know how to do this anymore

these few words are for you.

*******.
i hate you.
i'm sorry.
i miss you.
i hate you.
*******.

every morning i wake
with your voice in my head
your taste on my lips
your breath on my neck
your head on my chest
your fingers in my hands

and your memory in this empty room

it is that time of the night again
when nothing but rabid thoughts
swamp every recess of my mind

it is that time of the night again
where i contemplate taking either
my own life or a cigarette from my pocket

it is that time of the night again
where i am forever plagued
by these three words

i.
am.
sorry.

if you want to forget her,
never stay ******* sober.

i am forever sorry
and i am forever yours

(here's hoping)

you are forever forgiving
and forever mine