We all process information differently
I'm not heartless
And I'm not cold
There was a switch I will agree
But I've learned and I've grown
Life lessons that have cut me, broken me
But has yet to killed me
I won't thank you for ripping me apart
Although putting myself back together has been an adventure
That has lead me to bounteous places
Filled with magnificently bizarre people
However I will thank you for releasing me
My walls have collapsed, and my mind has expanded
I hope one day you'll grow as well
Until then I must say goodbye for now

There is something untrustworthy of a man with a half untucked shirt
Walking the late night streets with diamond dew on his heels
You asked with the essence of liquor on your breathe
If you could show me something
I said no
You heard yes
And now I walk alone
Tears running and mixing with the red gore of life
Broken and used
Stumbling helplessly home
I can still feel the inferno burning inside of me
What was seized and what was deposited are one now
Why me?
Why now?
Only four more miles until home
There is something so untrustworthy of life

The emptiness that comes to me
Doesn't come when the sun shines
It comes when the night stars litter the sky
Where the darkest souls come to play
That is when the desolation of my soul begins
Burning memories remind me of where I am
Lost in the past, while drowning in the future
What future could be placed in this obscure void
Glimmering moments of ecstasy slip through the holes
Seconds of bliss show what could be
To be content
Before the flood of hopelessness returns again

You know that moment when you realize everything is just one big ******* joke
We make promises, we declare love, we fight and we lose..
But when will we break from this cycle and create change
Or is change just a strain of hope that falls from the violet and silent universe
Will I ever get you out of my head
Did you move on
And what's next?
What would you want next in life when everything will be ripped away in the end
Relationships fail, people lie, and death fills the air
What could be next?
Maybe a small connection will ignite the strain of hope and bring light back
Maybe you'll mean nothing to me some day
But why wait for something that will never happen.

You were suppose to be my friend
Someone that I could count on
Someone that was going to be looking out for me always
But you weren't
You dumped pill after pill into my hands
And darkness into my heart
You promised to make my life better
But I could have lost it with you
I wonder if you even see what you are doing to others
You pass by without a care in the world
If only you knew how much you hurt everyone
How much you hurt me
I'm sure you don't
But I'm sure you wouldn't care either
And with that I must pay you ado
I would rather love myself then lose myself again
Thanks tho... for everything

All I wanted was to party
To loose myself for a couple of days
To let go of everything that has been piling up on my life
But instead i made my life even worse
I took some of this with that
And did I mention the free drinks
But hours in I met my match and it was all over
He said I was nice, and that I was funny
He also gave me drinks
And soon I couldn't even remember my own name
Let alone scream for help when he attacked me
It only took a couple of minutes and it was done
Taken away from me while I was loosing myself
Why didn't I think that would happen?
Because I didn't think that I could be hurt by anything anymore
But I was

How do I explain to people what this feels like
This feeling of wanting it all to end
I never wanted to be apart of this
All I've wanted is to feel full
This empty feeling has been pulling me down
I can't stand on my own anymore
But all you can see is my smile
A smile that I practice everyday
My laugh is full of desperation
All I want to do is lay down and die