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My life is full of complexities
Still you remain first on my priorities
For it is hard for you to understand
It seems like I lack commitment
I lack devotion
You love and hate me
You smile and cry over my shoulder
Tears fell on my flesh
Touching my heart
I can feel your pain
You kiss me deep
And hold me strong in your arms
You make me feel your warmth
But your heart is feeble and cold
I can feel your breath running down my spine
The scent of your love
Is so strong, so pure
Calling you name
Is a love song for my heart
Healing my soul
Your eyes translate vows of eternal happiness
Nature changes four times a year
Days with sunrays
Nights with stars and moon
Gleaming bright in the sky
Still
I haven’t seen something of your beauty
I was never a big fan of science
And
Its elements and compounds
Yet
the chemistry between our souls
Is hard to ignore
The affection
I feel is so strong
This is our souls love song
While we live long
I was once bullied, beaten
Burned and buried
With sneering slurs

I was an introvert
I gave them love
My compassion
I gave them all I had
They took advantage of me
And still I kept giving
And they took everything
And left me with nothing else to give
But hatred

I was afraid to say no
I felt feeble to stand my grounds

They made fun of me
My ragged garbs
And I could only watch them
Having fun amusing each other
Ripping my soul apart
My heart full of scars
Moaning in sorrow

They made me hate school
I was afraid to raise my hand
And
Ask when I did not understand
Afraid to do presentations and orals
And I failed…Morons
I called them friends
My Classmates

Yet
They filled me with vicious resentment
Burning in my chest
My eyes bleeding Vengeance
My breath became a feral windstorm
Terminating my feelings
I saw nasty curs when I grimaced at them
I tortured and killed insects
Burning them alive because all I could see
Were their evil faces
And I was killing myself
All along

Along the road I forgave them
And started to hate myself
For being a victim of cowardice
I have no one to blame
But myself
They did not chain my hands
Or latched my mouth
I was a coward
I couldn’t man up and defend myself

Or
Maybe I wasn’t scared of them
But
I was scared to become one of those undisciplined
Oaf minded juveniles

You shouldn’t disguise your actual self
To look better
To conform with friends
I am who I am
Not who they want me to be
I trashed myself more than they did
And I have learned my lesson
i see you
formulate in the sky,
until a permanent cloud remains,
for all to see.

You settle in a montaged dream sequence,
a sweeping sentiment of sweet innocence;
in the equilibrium of your natural habitat.

Just a rain clouds tears away.

A utopian notion,
broken reluctance inspired by emotions.
A colloquial calmness
confronts the surface,
we burrow
down,
deeper,
for the winter in preparation of the hibernate soul;

The harsh cold paradise takes toil into the parable.
In the midst of Nirvana with a frozen heart.
A lake remains.
The tears turn to rain and solidify likes scars.
The reign is over,

You melt into my arms.
~~
This is where the earth
There were piles of refuse time
Over millions of years
Wants to stand up

Walk the walk where the stand
Hundreds of thousands of
Light-years away
My friend, the North Star
Of his many friends
Lost in the pit of time

Mother's hair grew gray
All sides of the wall
Of the house has broken
Rust is over the grills of window
Said goodbye to dreams

White childhood,
Blue adolescence,
The red color of youth,
Instead of
Bruises under the eyes
Sending love to the jail
My friend is now hanging
within four frames of the wall

This is where the earth
Everything turns to be
A graveyard
Gray ash color valley
On that
History's foot print
will be exist

Nobody did not come back
The sun may never
rise again
Love is beneath
the silent dark of trash
All the truths will be turned
into devour
~~
@Musfiq us shaleheen
....
She loves me more than I can ever love myself
And so do I
It's costing me all I got to give
Just to dig myself out of this hole
I can't figure out why I was meant to live
Or how I can make myself feel whole

I can't afford to deal with this pain
That's been going on for so long
Even sheltered from the rain
I find a way to do something wrong

It's a struggle just to get out of bed
And go on living a life so empty
I can't erase these thoughts from my head
You can't understand what they do to me
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