i am imagining my guts spilt all over
your bedroom floor;
and you are licking my skin clean of all the
***** blood -

but the bones are all white and strong,
built tough from the labored years
of having a life
not worth living.

you will pick your teeth with them and call the police -
tell them:

there's been an emergency...
i'm a killer, stone cold killer
and there is no blood on my hands

a red beginning on the crown of his head;
king of nothing,
prince of everything -
yet

there's room to grow.

under a black horizon,
the shades of red hidden in bleak
discreteness
are delicious and
demonic.

demon king, demon king

he spreads his wing under the eclipsed sun:
a shadow of a former self.

no longer does he wait for the world
for a seat at the table.

he has learned that hell can be raised
when heaven won't come down.

i'll blow my brains out
to your favorite song;

if you see the lyrics
spelt out in my gore
maybe you can see
how much i cared

i wish i could tell you i love you, but i can not.

the words are too heavy on my tongue
to utter such a
bone-dry lie.

i'm high on your tar-black darkness -
that sick cloud of evil;
deep, dark, and broken.

my sun-blood will swallow you whole, so i can not tell you
that i love you.

you must split my lip and lick the lie from
my dripping
red
gore,

then beg me
to **** you again.

my mouth has been filled with a flood;
the waters are tainted with the acid of the world.

it wears my teeth down into
pearled-knives,
and they cut the insides of my cheeks -
mixing in
bad blood with
a devilish pollution.

i cannot release a cry.
i cannot stomach the feeling.
i cannot ***** the sickness.

i've been sleepwalking into blackholes,
turning cartwheels by oblivion
with a hell
stuck between my lips.

i've been swallowed from the inside out -
flashing in and out of life
with the firestorm of
sirens.

the reds and blues scream in unison
for a world greater than you and i.

there has been a silence in my life
that has been ringing  
with the furor
of gunshots.

the hot-smoked blow of air
giving birth to death in metal -

and my ears bleed a red
more red than blood.

i am deaf to all reason and numb to every feeling.

i am a doll made of dirt
and fake gold.

no marks of teeth will ever scar me.

i stand proudly with a broken back
smiling
even though
there's nothing to live for.