I’m addicted to the feel of cold metal sliding across bare flesh
Addicted to the instant
when nothing marks smooth skin
immediately before
red rivers rapidly rise
painting a once white canvas
with a flood of emotion,
tears on my cheeks,
sobs caught in my throat,
numbness replaced by pain & sadness.
Addicted to the imperfection
of red welts and dotted scabs that follow,
fingers drawn like magnets
to the texture of healing skin,
tracing over and over and over now fading ridges
Amazed that I am strong enough
to heal myself over and over and over.
Convincing myself that I am strong enough.
I find strength in my weakness.

poetry in disguise
soothing for the soul
thousands of playlists
waiting to be explored

Can you see that light?
Deep inside you
It has weathered the storms
Yet it is still burning

The darkness surrounds it
Crashing it into tiny pieces
But it just keeps burning
Small, but bright

Can you see the love in your pain?
The beauty in your blood
The reason for your loss
And the greatness of your pasts?

It happens so quick you won’t be able to react
When you finally see the love that you have
To realize the meaning behind all of your pasts
And look to the direction of that golden path

It takes a shift in perspective
To see the world as a great act
To realize the perfection in our existence
And accept the flow of creation

The infinite wholeness is always us
It is eternally together and forever apart
As we dreamed of this endless love
We danced in joy and sadness
As love

When the world becomes black
Im almost safe
The impossible becomes possible
And the unreal becomes real
My darkness is kept low
And my imagination flys high
But that can only last for so long
The world will come to color
The impossible will escape out of reach
And the unreal will hide away
My darkness will creep back
And my imagination will be shoved in

But eventually I will go back to the blackness,
Forever
We all will
And then we will be safe forever

tonight my mind
is running in place

in a desert
I am a boiling

brain

there are no
words to express

or there is
nothing to feel

I am raw but I
want to be naked

exposed to my
demons

I hear
the black bird

screech I watch
it descend

I want it to
enter me

I splay my arms
display my soul

I want it to rip out
all my elements

so I can start over

You touched my heart
And broke it gently