I find love to be a painful concept. Each time i love, i risk opening a wound dug out by the animal in me. And in love's sick game i've grown tired of the fight, tired of the constant tug of war between the past, the present and the ****** heartache. After awhile, it all just seems easier to give up on, then to move forward. And i guess this is the feeling of losing yourself.

Love is a bleeding mess, red paint splattered on a ****** canvas. My heart decays like petals off a rose, wanting to be whole again. To be enslaved, I seek an act of closure because it's an ongoing issue. I get emotionally attached to someone then begin to push them away for unexplainable reasons.

Why did you have to go and say that you wanted to be with me when you had no intention of doing that at all?

The way you looked at me and said things to me, I thought it was real. It was nothing but a ruse to perhaps get me to love you.

If your plan was always to walk away, there was no need to bring in your family.

I miss your touch but most I miss your smile. I miss your tender eyes looking at me in the morning.

I never minded your baggage. I looked at it as something we both could face.

When I expressed my fears you always reminded me that you would stand by me. How was i to know that this was all a lie?

This isn’t a poem but a lament from my heart. These are the words I wish I could say to you.

With each tear that falls I am reminded of my stupidity, of being naive for ever believing you.

Just the thought of you being with another tears my heart apart. I curse the day you crossed my path.

You’ve become nothing but a dagger in my mind and existence.

And I am nothing to you.

The singing rotted chimeras, of the oozing blood church

Sing their disemboweled hymns, as the somber bell chimes to the dead

Along the pews are dried blood bibles, words of horror and sorrow

Written by men who thought to play God, and reap the values of the meek

As the suicide clocks strike their hands, and the blood soaked ravens take their flight

The blackened sun sets on the streets of acid, and the blissful dread plays as a music box

Sometimes I wish a planet would crash
right into this godforsaken world.
I wouldn't flinch, I wouldn't thrash
knowing that around my heart, your hands are curled.

Sometimes I wish we could just nuke
each other to oblivion . It wouldn't hurt
A flash, I wouldn't have the chance to puke
as finally we would be buried in the dirt.

Sometimes I wish your loving hand would come and take us away.
Sometimes I wish He would come again.
Lord, please come again,
For I resent being made from my clay.

I wouldn't have to hide,
I wouldn't have to see the tears of the broken-hearted.
For too long I have cried,
But the time has come for me to join the departed.

Your kiss, like the newest rose
its scent filling my weary head
I dream of you
with the utmost passion
We tumble, entwined
our legs and love
the sweetness
of the midnight breeze
upon your lavished skin
I tremble at the thought
of losing your adoration
The fierce beating of my heart
to be held skillfully
in fragile hands
of the one most loved
through all of eternity
I beg of thee my beauty
forsake all others
and I shall shower you
with rose petal water
in the early morn
and drench you in
sinful passion in the night