he was holding at the end
holding at the end of the line
maybe hoping maybe ending
I dare not to see what's in his mind

I teased a little bit
shaking the end of the line
it was me holding on
it was me at the other end of the line

where were we?
both at the ends of a road
ends of the road
not together but a part

realized that by the end
tried to hold on by the ends
oh, but it slip! you let go
you let go of the string that connects our line.

One day I'll go
One day you will know
One day we'll see
and one day we'll understand

besides me, there was her
besides you, there was two
besides everything, it stops and go
life, and whatever that comes in between

there were many uncertain certainties
many

all alone, listening to the radio
trying to find the song that caught you
trying to find the song that caught me
trying to find the song that caught us

I was never this sad
I was never this stressed
I tried to see the clearing
should have just asked for spacing

Now I have to wander and wonder
all alone, deserted by you, and your
pieces of letters, pieces of songs, pieces...
pieces of you that you have left for me

What was that for?

Can't break the pretense
it's what keeps me straying
Can't really help but keep it
to spill will fill nothing but hatred

holding the act just a little bit
just maybe someone may see it
not from you but maybe
just a little and maybe you...

laughing and squealing our heart out
I almost asked it, almost say it
what was it, where did it began?
always dazing, that was me fallin'

what are "we" really?
maybe there ain't we
just me and you
nothing more than two.

Remember when we talked about death?
I said it must have been a savior to those
who suffered
who seeks but does not found reason
who was left out
who was unloved, unadored
who was pained
and who regrets the most

but you said otherwise
you said death is the reason
for beauty, love, hope and good to exist
you said that people would not expect anything in life
without death...

I have gone to a lot of thinking again
I was troubled with sweet and sad memories this morning
and I have thought...

that the reason we fear death
the idea of oblivion
memories slipping into that black hole...that nothingness
it pains every inch of me and cringe my very soul.

that must be it.

In these devious time
you had bring forth your light
once again, you have saved me
that smile and stare of yours

how could I ever repay you
you have kept me from sanity
you have made me look into tomorrow
let that continue still

let me see you more, and feel you more

he was looking at her
her mistakes and petty trouble
he says he loves her because of that
he looks at her more and less of me

he tells me his troubles
oh and I think I am the one concerned
for I toss and turn and bleed
for its me who hurts most and her the least

he tells me his secrets
and I tell him I'll be quiet as I can be
but the bottle has been crushed
I am not amused at the very least

he made me mad
while her... fall fast asleep
he tell me he loves her
and me his bottle of list

I cannot hold on
I needed to move on
for I fall and fall hard for him
but he never sees me and never will

I will fall and break
nothing will say 'poor ye girl'
for I was not warned
this was the consequence of falling in love to someone.

Am I finally at the entrance?

where according to hearsay;  
no one dared to enter?
no one ever came back?
no one can escape?

Is this the dark wood?
where man has lost and lost his path?
where man face his fears and damns his past?
Is this the dark wood if I may ask?

If it be so I dare pray
that light may shine and show my way
It is cold and at the same time blazing hot
this may be a delusion or confusion

If it be so I dare pray
that I may be let and live again
I have learned my lessons
I shall never return and turn my back again

Dear heart,
how could thou hold still all tis while?
how could thou beat all forms of throbbing and hurting?
how could thou hold?
how could thou?

I am unworthy of thy service
I am unworthy of thy trust
I am unworthy of anything
for I fall and I break
I never learned

I am fragile
I am stubborn
I am weak,
and that is trouble

If I were thou and you were I
I should be in trouble
for you know the mind and will are sometimes lost
Oh dear heart,
how will I ever repay you?

Why are you wearing a purple top?
I want to know.

It's whenever I look at him I fall in love again
It's like a paradox, you love in order to hate
It's like wanting to live life but wanting to die anyway
It's the love and hate relationship I will never bargain to anyone else.

It started with a simple glimpse
then an exchange of smiles, then eventually 'hi's' and 'hello's'
then we veered away
then one day we're back.

It hurts, it feels good
what else is there
it's a roller coaster that I never want to get over with
it's the danger I keep looking for

Yes, I am in love.
With him who does not know
I do not need him to reciprocate.

What to do?
What to do today?
We have talked about Confessional Poetry
but I realized that I have none to confess

I am no Sylvia Plath
I have nothing to distress about
I have no daughter nor Daddy
no love to suffer to and fro

I am no Annie Lennox too
I dare not put my hands on you
you..
you are a vegetable
I compare you with a green vegetable
you are off no use
of no feelings
nor hatred.

Oh, what to do
What to do.

Despite the difference between us...
You being a law student, and I a humanities student
I have come to like and gradually love you.

We have never talk...yes
but I assume the days we get to bump in the library is our main date
our simple glimpse is the very expression that 'we know'
our awkward gesture suggests we are moved and somehow flattered

I may be delusional at those part said
but those sparks in your eyes suggest otherwise

I thought that at night the sky is sleeping
That everything God ever created goes to bed
That even the night creatures... in a second collapses and joins rest
But one night, I stayed wide awake
I stared at the sky and it stared back at me
It winks through the glitters of the stars
Made it feel its presence through the wind...


Have you ever wondered how livelier it is than at daytime? I did for the first time in my life.