You had friends, not many, but
still, you had friends. You were
happy, felt mature and never
worried about anything, but
recently you seem to be moving
backwards, walking in the wrong
direction. You shed your friends
like you shed your dead skin cells.
You are growing backwards even, you
are becoming a whiny, jealous,
insecure, and self aware toddler;
everything looks to harm you, and
you are afraid even daddy and mommy
won't love you anymore or just
you've grown so old that their love
for their baby has diminished to a
critical point where the care and
attention you now desperately need
are no longer an option.
You feel horribly lonely, but in
isolation, who cares, who will hear
you. No one, you are dead inside,
but you are afraid of ****** death,
for even in heaven, you are afraid
you will be alone. But, how can you
live when you don't even feel your
own breath, let alone anyone
else’s. You don't scream, don't
want to scream, don't need to
scream, NO ONE will HEAR YOU.
You are dead and alive, you are invisible.
More of a monologue from my unhappier days.