I'm made of all;
The books I've ever read
Poems I've ever written
Faces who have smiled at me
Hugs that have wrapped around me
Caresses that have graced my inner thigh
Countries & continents my feet have touched
The lovers as we simultaneously reach ecstasy within
Lonely nights shedding tear drops
Nights gazing black skies moon & stars
Children falling asleep to my heartbeat
Animals whose soul was found through reflective eye stares
Conversations spoken in French, Spanish, Italian, Xhosa, Afrikaans, Norwegian, German
Years of ******-, cognitive-, dialectical-, art-, drama-, music-, mindfulness-, trauma-, psychiatry-; therapies
The drinks & drugs & mind altering substances dispersing my mind
In all I'm made of;
Love
Lust
Greed
Fear
Joy
Freedom
Longing
Dreams
Despair
Sadne­ss
Anger
Frustrations
Happiness
Anxieties
Insecurities....

In all I'm made of;

A soul; securely contained within a body of battled scars;
over;
pain & triumphs, losses & gains, rejections & acceptances, dishonours & accolades...

With the hope; she too, can live life through.

© Sia Jane

the first time I saw her,
everything in my head fell silent.
her eyes were reflections of galaxies
so many have gotten lost in before me.
her lips formed a smile like a flickering candle,
but a smile nonetheless.
her hair was let loose like a restless ocean.
she was breathtaking.
and it was when i felt my heart skip a beat
that i knew *i had to have her.

Family: a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head.

I need to know the meaning of the word family.
The true meaning.
For years it has eluded me.
But not today.

The family,
your family,
my family,
our families.

What the world perceives and what I perceive as family,
Are the same in words but not in thought.
My wish is for everything to be as one.
No separation of any kind.

When you hear the word family, what comes to mind?
Love and affection?
Support and acceptance?
Haha, I'll tell you about my family.

I've learned that it's immoral to be who you are,
To question how you grew up.
It's wrong to have an opinion..
In my family.

It's wrong to stand for justice,
To turn away from hypocrisy.
To live your life as you intended it to be.
In my family.

You do your best to please,
But then you end up on your knees.
Begging to be accepted..
But forever being rejected.

Does this define family for you?
Yes? No?
Most definitely not for me.
But here's my definition too.

Family: the people who love & accept you for all that you are.

I hear the word family and I think of the people who support me in everything that I do..
They pick me up, not kick me, when I fall.
They understand, they're always there when I call.
They believe when no one else does.

A saying goes,
'You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them.'
This means nothing to me.
Blood makes you related, but loyalty makes you family.

So in the eyes of my blood,
I failed to do right and chose to do wrong.
I chose love & unity
Over pain & anxiety.

The cycle ended.
My wounds are mended.

I am happy.
Because I now know,
The true meaning of
Family.

[r.r.r.w]