I'm drunk and I just
want to let you know
my head hurts when I see you
because I like you
and I am scared
because I get intense
and clingy
and you don't like that.
So sitting next to you
makes my bones ache
and my muscles scream
like I just ran a marathon. 

When you're sad
which seems all the time now
it gets worse
because now
I want to hold you
rub your back
kiss your head
and tell you it'll be okay, 
but you won't believe me
and I don't wanna be clingy.
I know you like it when I'm not
but I like you
so I have to scream
in my head that I can't
that sitting next to you is fine
but not TOO close
can't text him all day
can't show him this poem
can't constantly kiss him
on the shoulder or cheek
can't make him think
I'm clingy.

My body aches 
head hurts
eyes sink in
pale red lips
cuts in my thighs like
Swiss cheese
and all I want
is to feel those lips
and hear your voice
and see that smile.
I want to text all day
and know you're okay.
Call you when I get 
off work
and hear about your day
and how you feel.
Hear that laugh
that makes my old bones
vibrate as if I'm at a concert.

I am a crazy
clingy boy
and you want someone
that can sit alone
in a house
in quiet
and not feel
a thousand hands
clawing at his skin
and voices screeching and
calling him names.
You want someone that
can fend for himself
but I can't do either
and
I don't wanna lose you.

The space inbetween
Our ******
And your sleep
Is my favorite
Because I can pretend
That for once
You love me

Despite all my losses
never a loser

all the jokes; word games.
no clown

take all that I own
no poor man

****** palms, non-  
Messiah

I rest to strike
with greater force,

saving all my laughs
for last.

Tangled up
in broken lines of
communication,
seeking out a
melody
that was never there.

Discordant sounds,
blocking them out like a
dam of
sticks and stones.

But your words, your
honest
unchosen
words
will never
break my bones.

For they are frail,
crumbling away when I
catch them in my
fingers
if even there at all.

Hanging for a moment
in the flushing heat
between us
before
dropping
like orbs of clouded glass
and shattering at my
feet.

Worthless now.
Fragments.

All the cuts on my
fingers
from trying to
pick up the pieces,
put them together,
nurse them
tenderly.
Seeking some meaning
hidden in
fractured light.

But you didn't
think of that:
do not realise
what I am
looking for.

But I am here.
I am here and I am
listening -
listening to endless
nothing.

For you make
pitiful words
priceless

because they are
yours.

Poetry
stops
the brain
and starts
the heart.

Pointy shoulder blade
- yours - digging into my cheek
Comfortable pain.

Now you hold my hand
Fingers threaded between mine
Hold it forever.

Interlocking limbs
You draw me in closer still:
Don't ever let go.

Fingertips tracing
(Please excuse my sweaty back)
Painting words on skin.

Your lips against mine
Tongues searching for an answer
How it came to this.

Though we won't complain
Laugh it off in the morning -
Just please don't forget.

All I ever got
out of loving you
was a snog and a
fuckload
of poetry.