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woke up  
on tuesday morning,  

one foot  
in front of the other.  

no rush,  
no hurry—  

just me,  
blue and under  
the weather.  

i used to find  
sunshine  
in so many places,  

but i lost  
the best  
i’ve ever had—  

and now,  
the sun feels  
a little colder
now.

i wonder  
whether  
it gets better.  

i used to be  
a goal-getter.  
now i’m in overdrive,  

short-term PTSD—  
nerves wrecked,  
spirit stretched.  

so many days  
crying,  
wondering if  
this ever ends—  

’cause i’m tired  
of living  
a bittersweet story,  

and tired  
of being  
down bad.  

you were  
the best—  

the best  
i’ve ever had.
There are mornings where the sunlight doesn’t hit quite the same—when grief lingers in the corners of routine, and you realize you're no longer who you used to be.

Inspired by All Time Low’s "The Weather", this piece reflects the quiet unraveling after losing someone who felt like your sun.
Joshua Phelps Jul 11
prayed for love,
prayed for life,
prayed for hope—

searched for,
longed for
something more

than just
a reason to believe,
a reason to
be less alone.

i prayed for days
to take
the pain away,

but the pain
was mine
to bear.

and the cross—
my testament,
a vow

to never let
fear interfere.

but one prayer
remains unanswered:

will i
make it
out okay?

surely,
because i hope—

it doesn’t always
have to stay
this way.
Sometimes the loudest prayer is the one left unanswered. This piece is a quiet reckoning with pain, faith, and the fragile hope that tomorrow might feel different. Inspired by Anberlin’s 'Nothing More,' it’s a reminder that even in the silence, you are not alone."
i don’t know
why i allow
you to step
into my life.

i’ve fought
so long
for peace—

you walk right in
like you’ve got
the right.

you got me
feeling stuck
in place.
i waived the flag,
called a truce—

but instead of
stillness,
you chose
the chase.

what do you want,
anyway?

i spent so long
trying to figure it out—

but it’s still
the same lines
on a different day.

i don’t know
why i let you
circle back
again,

when all you do
is skirt the truth
and keep me
in your game.
Some people keep stepping in and out of your life like it’s a revolving door, never giving answers—just echoes. I wrote this piece from the heart, tired of the repetition, tired of the silence, and finally needing something real. Inspired by Stand Atlantic’s “Love U Anyway,” this poem is my voice in the static. If you've ever waited too long for someone to make up their mind, this is for you.
Joshua Phelps Jun 29
i try to see
the bright side
every day,

but deep down,
i’m scared—

my nerves
frayed,
worn thin
like overused threads.

i spent years
simply surviving,

keeping my head low,
waiting
for the right timing

to make it out
unscathed.

but cuts
and scrapes
still touch the surface,

and the light
inside my heart
flickers—
on repeat.

i know
what it’s like
to feel something,

but life
isn’t fair,

and the pain
i bear
makes me question:

will i remain
broken forever?

or will i
break free
from this cycle—

free from
the fear—

and like a phoenix,
take flight,
rise from the ashes,

and finally
fix my broken heart?
this poem is about survival, exhaustion, and the hope that somehow…
even after everything, you’ll rise.

inspired by Point North’s “Into the Dark,”

this is for anyone still fighting to find the light again.

sometimes healing doesn’t roar—it flickers, then burns bright.
Joshua Phelps Jun 18
lately,
i've been down—
and i don't understand
why it still haunts me.

i thought
this would be
the last time.

i was ready
to move on,
but there was
one last storm
i didn’t account for.

i know—
pain isn’t linear,
and sometimes,
the thunder rolls
before the rain
takes form.

but love
was never meant
to last,

not today,
not tomorrow—
not even
if you asked.

so baby,
i ask of you:
let this love
live in the past.

there won’t be
a final act—
just two hearts
moving forward,
intact.
let this love (live in the past)

a quiet goodbye.

not out of anger—just out of finally knowing when to let go.

this one’s about the storm you didn’t see coming,

the closure you had to create yourself,

and the kind of love that’s better left behind.
Joshua Phelps Jun 13
like a car crash,
explosions fill
my head

emotional wreckage—
thoughts tangled
in dread

am i the problem?
or are they
projecting
instead?

i let go
of the wheel

just to
feel something—

go off the rails,
’cause sanity
feels surreal.

am i the problem?
or just
trapped in
my head?

because dealing
with this

is harder
than i ever
imagined.
inspired by Story of the Year’s “Take the Ride,”

this poem unpacks the moments when self-reflection spirals into self-blame.
it’s about losing control—mentally, emotionally—and wondering if the crash was your fault...

or if you were set up to break.

for anyone who's ever asked, "is it me?"

this one's for you.
Joshua Phelps Jun 13
waking up  
in a haze,  

state of delirium—  
where am i at?  

i look in the  
mirror and see  
a reflection  

of someone  
i used to know.  

i need a place  
to escape—  

all i wanted  
was to protect  
my peace  

and be safe.  

the waves  
come and go,  

emotional  
instability,  
barreling toward  
insecurity:  

here i go.  

all i wanted  
was only love—  
but that was  
taken away,  

and i’m left  
with all  
the blame.  

you say  
i broke you  
down—  

but all i  
ever wanted  

was to build  
us up—  

and the  
foundation  
was shaky  
ground.  

waking up  
in a haze,  

i fight  
to stay awake.  

please, god,  
let the rain  
wash away—  

and take away  
my pain.  

because i  
don’t want  
to go another day  

getting  
carried  
away.
A raw plea from inside the storm.

WASH AWAY THE PAIN is a desperate cry for release—when love breaks, and you're left staring at your reflection, wondering what went wrong.

This one’s for anyone who’s ever begged the sky for peace and prayed the rain could rinse the heart clean.

If you’ve ever felt like the weight of healing might break you—this poem gets it.

It bleeds, begs, and breaks—but it’s honest.
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