I wrote you a letter
which is ridiculous because I could call you
but a letter seemed more appropriate
and well, I can't just turn back now.

I put that letter in an envelope
and went to buy some stamps
The same kind that you had a collection of
I find it difficult to think of it

I placed a stamp on the envelope
I addressed it to you
the address was not the same
you moved so long ago

But I never sent it
I never let it go to you
and I regret that so much
because I knew you would have liked it

I took that letter
The envelope has yellowed with age
and I put it in a fire pit
and watched as it burned

I figure the smoke will carry it to you
To let you know I've been thinking
because this family season makes me sad
since it reminds me of who I once had

The words were only ever meant for you
and as the smoke drifts into the sky
and it slowly disappears
One single rain drop falls onto my face

and I know that you are here with me

" But then again, life itself is a paradox. All in betweens and slow dances between yes & no.

Maybe what I would like is certainty and promise.
I want a sunday morning, 2:49pm phone calls,
unwashed dinner plates in the sink, two towels needing a tumble-dry.
Two tooth-brushes. Grocery bills worth two & a half stomachs.

To know the taste of someone's laugh.
Something that started as butterfly kisses
that burned into
                   a slow bloom of an inferno.

But Monday will come and life continues."