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Jack Jenkins Sep 2019
A brief breath stolen away
Wishing on a dandelion the rest will follow suit
Wishing the empty page would match my empty heart
Anxiety suffocating me, I'm barely breathing
Distant dark waters call my name to the shore
Lull my senses and deprive my feelings
The right side of my mind hopes
The left side of my mind despairs
My heart loves my head but my head says my heart is weak
Nothing is ever good enough and peace cannot stay
The voice in my throat often lies to me
Coping mechanisms just aren't enough anymore
Even suicide says she has nothing to offer me
In the briefest moment of honesty
I don't want this anymore
Whatever this is
//A reflection of who I am when nobody is looking//
Jack Jenkins Sep 2019
More distant more cold
The frigid waters freeze your fear
The frothy fog fades the shore
Swing low and stare at the stars
Ice halos around each twinkle
Born of broken wishes
Frost lays her sheet across your bones
There is no worry here for you
Be at peace and sink below
One with the salt and the sea
//on the sea & anxiety//
Jack Jenkins Sep 2019
Art should be disturbing to the comfortable
A comfort to the disturbed
A shape of two being one
The creator casting one half
The eye of the beholder creates the other
Unified into a single shape with infinite dimensions
Shining like a diamond
The shape of as heart
Windowed soul
Unshuttered and unfettered
A pouring of everything
Filling of empty spaces
The gap between the ribcages
The pain behind the faces
Unmasked, raw, refined, precise, agonizing
Hopeful and despairing
That is what art should be
Art is nothing more than that
Create beauty
//On art//
Jack Jenkins Sep 2019
it lingers
hovers
encircles me
this simple fear
in the twilight of my reflection
your face
your voice
not the same as my memory
im afraid
i have forgotten you
not your memories
but you
hold my breath in my lungs
to replicate your hugs
it's not the same
am i the one who changed?
i don't remember you as you are
but as you were to me
the painting on the walls
the halls of my loneliness
the emptiness of my heart
still love you always
still love you always
//On her//
  Sep 2019 Jack Jenkins
b e mccomb
saturdays smell like
bleach under my nails
sleep in my eyes
scratches on hands
gluey stuck fingers
glare off an empty parking lot
and other people’s
uncomplicated lives

give me enough time
and i can get rid of
any kind of stain
in your coffee cup
but i don’t take the time
to wash out my own

and i can’t get rid of
how i sometimes feel
like less than a person
a second class citizen
or some kind of
preprogrammed robot
just here to assist with
strangers personal quests

i’m not the
swashbuckling hero
out on an adventure
i’m the placid villager who
never moves from behind
the counter night or
day and only ever repeats
the same half dozen lines
wears the same outfit every
time you see them

i don’t want
to be the hero
anymore
all i want is
to live comfortably
in this town
and let my life
unfold

all i want is
to get the dirt out
from my fingernails
and get enough sleep

to love
and be loved
to drink coffee
in the morning
wine at night
and water all day

but i never
want to be the
chosen one
i just want to be
the one who points
you in the right direction
copyright 9/18/19 by b. e. mccomb
Jack Jenkins Sep 2019
I sit at the window and wonder
If your memories are like mine
Or have they been scorched by time
I wonder if you remember my voice
Or if I remember yours
God I miss you more and more
My throat wants to shout on the shore
Just to see if my voice could carry to you
Useless and fruitless as it may be
Just to say I'm sorry
~~~
the ghost i knew still haunts my view...
//on her//
Jack Jenkins Sep 2019
I'm okay with not being okay
and that's okay
I didn't want to wake up
and face the day today
Didn't want to be alone again
Surrounded only by empty air
and voices in my head
Telling me they've told me
For the millionth time to let go
and I hold on tighter
Let it out but keep the leash on
Let it leech my hopes out of me
But that's okay I guess
I promise I'm okay
Even when I'm not
//On anxiety and depression//
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