A frosted veil
  with haunting voice
Ice shattered
  raining from skies
A world below
  but I know it not
Starlight above
  a longing for love

I can't sleep
The horrible news is bothering me
My fellow Filipinos in Marawi
Are being attacked by Maute Group/ISIS
They are burning down the place
The houses, the hospitals, the churches
And if you can't prove that you are a Muslim
They'll take you as a hostage
Those who don't wear hijabs "are taken care of"
Horrible, really horrible
My fellow filipinos there are suffering
Muslims and non-muslims
It's not supposed to be about religion
It's supose to be being people, human
It's suppose to be "humanity"



*"Save me from people of the world" Psalm 17:14

It's horrible, really horrible. How can these people be so cruel?? It's really scary, really scary

the truth is
i am hoping
you remember
me soft and malleable
sweet wine vinegar
wandering
the backwoods in all
my bittersweetness
twisting in my sleep
or humming
incoherent songs
in the passenger
seat.

I wish you were still here,
but I'm kinda glad you're not,
you'd see the miserable excuse,
of a man I have become.

I love you so much,
I wish our hands were,
intertwined tightly,
your head on my chest.

I miss you, y'know?
You had all of my heart,
all of me, period you had,
it hurt like hell when you left.

You probably had to leave,
couldn't keep me in your life,
with all the family drama,
but I understand.

If you could have kept me you,
would have kept me,
but it doesn't stop the pain
of you not being here with me.

I miss you, y'know?
I love you.

An arrow points to the
hole in my chest
where my heart
once lived.

Happiness?
Where have I gone?
Cold and darkness
embraces my mind.

The mirror
shows me as
hollow and dead
like I'm a corpse.

I'm totally disconnected
and disjointed in this
reality, this plane
of existence.

Where has the me
that I once was
gone to?
Where am I?

I feel nothing
tasting only the
loneliness and dust
on my lips.

I've become paralyzed
in the waters of despair.

I still can't really process
you left.
My best friend, through the
hard times and the good.
You just left.
Violated my trust and then left.
Blamed me and then left.
I put everything on us and
you just left.
I'm too scared to cry.
I'm too scared to breathe.
My mind is just in a fog
can't understand you.
Were you looking for an excuse
to leave?
Was I that bad of a friend to you?
Did you suffer the same hell
I went through for you?
Seven years, and the one time I desperately
needed you, you tell me to *******?
Do you not understand I would
do anything for you?
That you were one of the reasons
I didn't pull that trigger last night?
You leave,
block me,
don't respond,
just like that...
And that hurts me more
than my friend who killed herself,
or the second,
or the third...
the lover I lost,
all the rejections,
the family issues,
the PTSD,
all of it combined...
You never even asked
why I was suicidal last night.
What did I do to you
to think of me with such
little regard? To discard me?
We talked everyday.
I supported you through
every ****** boyfriend you had.
I did everything I could
to make sure you were okay
when your mom had the stroke.
I've written you hundreds
of heartfelt poems
(that you never would read
unless I sent them to you)
and you leave
when I cry out for help...

**Who have you become?
Because you're not the woman I knew.