Its the answer I’ve rehearsed,
The shield I raise without thinking.
Three words stacked like bricks between me and the world.
Because if I say more,
If I let the cracks show.
They might fall through.
And then I’d have to explain
why my heart feels heavy,
Why my mind wont stop spinning,
Why the silence inside me is louder than any noice outside.
So I say,
“I’m fine”
Like a broken record,
Like a lie I tell myself first.
It’s easier this way,
to tuck the storm away,
To hide the pain behind a smile,
To keep the floodgates closed.
But sometimes, in the quiet, when no one’s watching those words echo back at me.
A hollow, Empty promise that doesn’t mean a thing.
Because inside,
Im not fine.
Not really.
But the world doesn’t need to know that.
So I say it again,
Softly,
As prayer,
As a lie,
“I’m fine.”