I barely dipped my feet
while you dove head first,
into treacherous waters,
seeking enlightenment
only to find each euphoric second
drip away
draining your sea.

Ten dollars a hit,
five dollars a hit.
"I promise I'm finished,
I promise I'll quit."
A cost higher than you imagined, unfortunately.
Not just for you,
but me as well.

We got high in the mountains,
dilated eyes gazing up to the stars,
seeing God masterfully paint the universe.
It was beyond description.
Then...
it ended.
I treasured the memory like a secret lover
you chased it in fervor,
one after another.

****** powder dripping from your nostrils,
hiding holes in your skin,
you stared in my eyes claiming you saw the heavens,
opening your palm,
as if you held the key to paradise.
I closed it and offered mine,
a key to escape the unseen prison
you've bound yourself in.
You frowned and turned away.

I wanted to scream,
whisper,
plead...
but I said nothing.
I let you sink farther and deeper into chasms of the deep.
Merely, watching.

Now I sit here at the edge,
with the waves around my feet,
watching your figure disappear
into the foam
and the unforgiving jaws
of choices you've made.
Forgive me.
I gazed into the abyss while it swallowed you whole,
I could have done more to save you.
I should have tried to save your soul.


**...but I didn't...