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Stumbling into ancient scripts, authored a decades plus ago,
ago being a modifier of time quantities, minute or large, unspecific
without an objective adjective additive, that faucets a stream of an interlocutory elocution of a batter of rooted emotional histories,
but not histrionics

fanciful words for dredged up memories, acute, but tarnished,
powered yet worn by a cousin of ago, a/k/a,
age
and yet
renews as of,

at this very second, as if it were a first, a tumult of visions, swelling of remembrances, embodied scars, and I weep anew but not
for me, as much for the resonating simpatico souls with whom
they even  now vibrate with resonance of the immediacy of
If not now, When?

Aside: The exterior environment is noisy wet pelting of thunderstorms and ****** sheets of bulleting rain, piercing projectiles, but I am safe in the sunroom, sadly happy my dog is no longer here to shiver and tremble, cuddle and be soothed by steady stroking

But I am here, wrestling with this dredging operation, digging up
tons of sand that require dumping, and I ask, inquire, beg:

Who will take this detritus off my hands, once more, now uncovered,
now recovered, the soil is already soaked and can absorb no more,
the soul is already soaked and can absorb no more, the weakened
heart, damaged and occluded, suffer cannot bare twice the

outrageous misfortune

of unbared recollections, twice, or thrice, and I feel myself drowning in revisiting pain, **** **** ****, these old poems, not nuggets, but boulders dropping from night skies, shot from a pitching machine, without letup, piercing of agonies that once ago  
freshly desecrated and decorated my basic training in humanity.

Enough whining:
I wrote those poems to
eject out those pains,
and I write this now, once more,
to realize that so so many still face
uncertain and unrelenting similarities,
doing their own sums,
and I wish them easing,
strength to compose and
thereby dispose of
the ineloquent
and eloquent
words of staining suffering


3:30am
Thur
July 10
2025
it ain't easy, when you relate, restrict and delegate,
when you draw a narrow lane on a highway that says
only left footed
poets need apply
<>
it does not say
slow cars stay to the right,
only trucks,
or oddly even,
no trucks



I love seasonality,
without thickly thinking
you take a break
from the poetry writing

one day I'll figure out a way
to monetize my love poems,
publish them as Shakespeare's couple(t)s,
"new edition plus
a couple of
newfound poems!"

maybe some fools will buy some thinking Shakespeare has been, resurrected!

love grows goes hot all over and
grow slower older
and grow colder,
in between those fine
ticklish teasing moments


when the miracle of resurrection repeats itself

something is said
a gesture is made
a finger strokes the cheek,
unexpected
and it all comes
rushing back again,
overfilling
that coffee cup mug she bought
just(ice)
for you

ain't gonna check how long it's been
since last I declaimed, disclaimed,
inflamed,
these pages with an only love poem

but I do know this:
it is something I think about,
It is something I know about,
it is something I feel about
daily
even on the nothing days,
when routine takes over
I know you couldn't remember of its passage,
is the waking up and the lying down to sleep


but the poets eyes are always open his emotive secret senses,
always alert,
what's that thing they always say,

his heart just wasn't in it!
(🥴if they only knew the truth😘)
What if today I took up space,
Decided it’s okay to love my face?
I’m allowed to scream and shout,
Don’t have to fake it, or hide to pout.

What if I told you you’d caught my eye,
Instead of waiting as moments pass by?
Would I then be viewed aggressive?
For knowing what I want, deemed obsessive?

Maybe I just want my needs fulfilled,
To show you I’m here, and equally skilled.

What if I let myself laugh too loud,
Not worrying about standing out in a crowd?
Let my opinions spill like wine,
No apologizing for these thoughts that are mine.

What if I danced alone in the street,
Made strangers smile at my untamed beat?
Would I still be called too much,
Or would someone finally crave my touch?

What if I didn’t talk myself down,
Lived my truth without fearing your frown?

I could say whatever comes to mind,
No more stitches, my lips now unbind.
I’ve made myself so small these days,
But I want to be big, have my turn on the stage.

This time I won’t even perform,
I’ll give a speech, I’ll change my norm.
Maybe it’s time to be unhinged,
To let myself out, chase a few whims.
What if I dared to love myself?
Peasants squabble,
the homeless freeze,
repeating the mantra:
Spare change, please!
Magazines for bedding
The Big Issue, Forbes Rich List...
Maybe we should eat the rich.

Billionaires in ivory towers,
snatched milk,
now turning sour.
Poundland Tories,
in desperate hours
“Five more years!” they stubbornly hiss...
Maybe we should eat the rich.

A 2p tax cut
up their sleeve,
while children starve
and pensioners freeze.
So out of touch
those pompous ******...
Maybe we should eat the rich.

If monkeys exhibited
hording behaviour,
they’d be studied
to see what makes them tick.
The thought of watching others starve
makes me sick...
Maybe we should eat the rich.

We could solve the energy crisis
in two quick flicks
render blue fat
for candle wicks.
No point in playing
Champagne socialists...
I think we should eat the rich.
A rewrite of an old poem from a couple of years ago.
Limerence is an odd thing.
I went over to your house again.
The same situation, all over again.
Except this time it was slightly different.
I had more control and felt euphoric.
Now I feel insane when I’m without you.
When you’re gone, who will I talk to?

I want to be so close to you that I can’t get any closer.
I guess I was when we were together.
With you, I feel happier than ever.
Are we meant to be together?

I think it’s best if we stay apart,
But oh how it hurts my heart.
I don’t wanna leave your side.
Maybe I am broken inside.

I hope, I ache, I reach for love but you can’t see my true face.
You only see my silhouette
You can see me but you can’t see who I am.

You’ve crossed every border of my skin,
But never asked who lives within.
When I think of you my palms get clammy and my stomach turns.
This doesn’t feel like love should.
This is just wrong.

When I think about you I get anxious.
So do I really like everything about you?
And do you like everything about me?
Or do you just make me feel loved?
And do I just satisfy you?
Do I like you?
Or do you solve my Limerence?
Joints… aching like rusted hinges
Hair… slipping away like autumn leaves
Memory…flaking off like the old paint that covered my walls
Fatigue… like a tide that never recedes

I feel as if
I've carried centuries in a single skin
Lived lives I can’t remember
But still feel in my marrow

And yet
I’m nowhere near the halfway mark

The same clock hands, circling
Almost in slow motion
Same dull rhythmic beating
Routine wears like sandpaper
Smoothing the edges
As the years blur and blow away
Before I thought one day I'd wake up in bed
Happy with no problems
Peace lying right next to me
no more worries, no more weight
that was what I thought healing was

The older I get I feel like thats not it not even close
Healing isn't a place, a destination
Its a journey, a rhythm, an acceptance

Healing or at least what I think it is
is being okay with having the bad days
not letting them eat you up

Its not about perfect mornings
its about getting up each day
not forgetting what happened the last
but just accepting
but who knows maybe that'll change
The moon sits above
Screaming you don't need to be
whole in order to shine
I love the moon and how it can be a good mentor and symbol of humans!!
There is a thing about
Putting a thing about
In a place
That makes it easy to do it
That makes the folks
That  might
Have had less of a light
If this website
Had maybe
Just
Eschewed it.
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